‘Why weren’t they able to deal with it today?’ Zoë asked curiously.
Ben pushed the thought aside. In truth, it shouldn’t have bothered him and the fact that it did had him hurrying on. ‘Most of the emergency response vehicles are out of commission at the moment. There’s a problem with the fuel supply, apparently. That’s why the surgery was contacted, and how Ross and I ended up helping out. It certainly wasn’t what we had planned for today.’
‘No, of course not.’ Zoë sighed. ‘Poor Ross, he must be devastated. And Heather too. She couldn’t have taken such a decision lightly.’
‘I don’t imagine so,’ Ben concurred, wondering if he should explain that Ross hadn’t appeared to be that cut up about what had happened. In the end, he decided not to say anything. People responded differently and who was he to judge?
‘What’s happening about the guests?’ Zoë frowned as she looked around the foyer. ‘I expect a lot of them are staying here. Do they all know that the wedding has been called off?’
‘I did my best to let everyone know, but I wasn’t all that successful, unfortunately.’ He saw the question in her eyes and continued. ‘Ross gave me the guest list and asked if I’d do the honours. I got in touch with as many people as I could, but some had already left home by the time I phoned. Ross has arranged for the vicar to meet any who slipped through the net when they turn up at the church.’
‘What a mess!’ Zoë exclaimed. ‘It’s going to cause a real stir, isn’t it? I’d hate to be in Ross’s or Heather’s shoes for the next few weeks.’
‘It won’t hit Heather as hard. She’s gone to London— caught the train last night, I believe. At least she’ll be spared a lot of the flak.’
‘I see.’ Zoë gave a little sigh and then stood up. ‘Well, thanks for letting me know what’s happened, Ben. It’s a real shame, but if it wasn’t going to work, it’s probably best that Heather called things off.’
‘I’m sure you’re right,’ Ben agreed, feeling something akin to panic grip him. Was that it? Was Zoë going to bid him goodbye and leave? There was nothing to keep her here now, nothing and no one.
That thought stung more than it should have done and it annoyed him too. He was over Zoë and he refused to let her influence his life in any way, shape or form. He stood up as well, a polite little smile curving his mouth, a smile that was guaranteed to convince her that he was well and truly over her. ‘When are you flying back to Paris?’
‘Tomorrow lunchtime.’ She glanced at her watch and grimaced. ‘I’ve got hours to kill now, unless I can re-book onto an earlier flight.’
‘Sounds like a lot of hassle to me,’ he said lightly. ‘Why don’t you stick to your original plan and enjoy a day here instead?’
‘Doing what?’ She glanced down at the elegant suit that clung to every delicious curve of her body. ‘I didn’t exactly come equipped for a weekend in the country.’
‘I could lend you some stuff.’ He managed a couldn’t-careless smile when she looked at him, although he was as surprised as she was that he’d made the suggestion. ‘All you need is a pair of jeans, a sweater and a jacket,’ he continued because there was no way he could stop now he’d begun. ‘And you’re ready for anything.’
‘Such as what?’ she demanded with a touch of challenge in her voice.
‘Oh, I don’t know…how about a hike up into the hills to get some fresh air?’
He glanced out of the window, using the moment to gather his thoughts. He hadn’t planned on spending any time with Zoë while she was here, but wouldn’t it prove, once and for all, that he was over her? Ever since he’d seen her name on that guest list he’d felt uneasy and he hated feeling that he wasn’t in control. Zoë had hurt him badly, destroyed his faith in love and commitment, all the givens he’d once believed in. He may appear the same old Ben on the outside, always up for some fun and ready to enjoy a joke, but inside he was a completely different person.
He no longer believed that love could conquer any obstacle. He no longer believed that two people were meant to be together. When Zoë had left him, turned her back on him and his love, she had destroyed all those certainties he had taken for granted. He would never love anyone the way he had loved Zoë. He would never allow himself to love that deeply again.
‘It is a gorgeous day,’ she said wistfully, and he glanced back at her.
‘Is that a yes, then?’
‘I don’t know.’ Her gaze lifted to his and he saw her mentally raise the barriers. ‘I didn’t plan on spending any time with you, Ben.’
‘I’m sure you didn’t.’ He ignored the jibe, didn’t even flinch when the arrow pierced his skin. He knew how she felt, that she didn’t want him and never would. Zoë didn’t do commitment. She didn’t do love and marriage and happy-ever-after, and he had accepted that. However, this time with her could be just what he needed to lay the past to rest.
‘I didn’t plan on spending time with you either, Zoë, but neither of us could have foretold what was going to happen. Why don’t we make the best of a bad job?’
His tone was calm and it seemed to work. He saw her relax and carried on, inwardly smiling. He had women falling at his feet, women eager to spend days—and nights!—with him but he didn’t want any of them at the moment. He wanted these few hours with Zoë to prove he could cope without her.
‘We’re both at a loose end this afternoon and we can fill in the time by having a walk, maybe even have dinner later if we’re not too knackered by then.’ He shrugged, a gesture that reeked of indifference even though he wanted this very much. ‘At least the weekend won’t have been a complete loss, will it? So what do you say, Zoë? It’s up to you.’
CHAPTER TWO
THEY drove to Capper’s Fell and parked in a lay-by. Zoë got out of the car, trying not to think about the last time they’d been there. There was no point looking back when she wouldn’t have done things any differently. She didn’t want to get married, didn’t want children, didn’t want to spend her life with Ben or anyone else. She had seen the damage love could do, suffered because of it, and she didn’t intend to give anyone that much power over her.
‘I thought we could walk to the top and down the far side if you’re up to it,’ Ben announced as he joined her and she nodded.
‘Fine by me.’
‘Sure you can manage in those boots? They are a little on the large side for you.’
He crouched down and began tugging at the laces of her borrowed boots. One of his sisters had left them at his house, he’d explained, and although they were half a size too big, Zoë had assured him they would be fine. Now she found herself wishing that she’d told him they had fitted perfectly. At least then she wouldn’t have had to suffer in silence as his fingers gently prodded her toes.
Heat flashed along her veins and she shifted her feet, wanting to make him stop. She could cope so long as Ben didn’t touch her, didn’t make her remember all the other occasions when his hands had caressed her. He’d been such a passionate lover, showing her with his hands and his mouth how much he had wanted her. Zoë had tried to hold something of herself back, to not respond so fully, so completely, but she’d never succeeded. When Ben had made love to her, she had given him everything—her heart, her mind and her soul. And that’s what had scared her most of all. She had no control when she was in Ben’s arms.
‘They’re perfectly adequate for the amount