He’d obviously waited too long. After one particularly bad fight about why he was gone so much and working so hard, she had given him back his ring. After a long spell of work and rodeoing, he realized he had to tell her about Cyrus’s will. He called her, saying that he had important news. Nothing.
Then he texted her. Again, nothing.
He came back to Saddlebank to talk to her in person, but she was gone. She couldn’t or wouldn’t give him that second chance or any explanation why.
He hadn’t heard from her since.
“Hey, ladies, look who I brought,” Monty announced as they stepped into the large, exposed-beamed living room. A fire crackled in the woodstove, generating a welcome heat.
His stepmother sat on a leather easy chair, facing him, her blond hair cut in a serviceable page boy, dark framed glasses emphasizing her green eyes. She wore a white shirt, black chinos and sensible white shoes, all of which combined to make her look precisely like the nurse she was.
Ellen sat with her back to him, her long brown hair, tinged with gray, pulled back in a ponytail hanging over the large brace that held her neck and upper chest immobilized. She sat upright in a chair and as she slowly got to her feet Tanner winced at the sight of the brace.
“I know, I know, I look like an alien,” Ellen said, her voice sounding restricted and strained. “I hope I don’t scare you too much. I’d still like a hug.”
“Be careful,” Monty whispered, detaining Tanner a moment. “She’s still in a lot of pain.”
Tanner nodded and slowly approached Ellen and, bending over, brushed a gentle kiss on her cheek. “Sorry, Ellen, that’s all you get from me for now.”
She smiled up at him and reached up to touch his face, then blanched in pain. “I keep thinking I can do what I used to. But it’s great to see you again. Though you look tired.”
“Been a long drive,” was all he said, glancing over at his stepmother. “Hello, Alice,” he said.
Alice set her cup aside, brushed her hands over her pants and slowly rose to greet him, as well. That Ellen, in spite of her disability, was quicker to greet him than his stepmother rankled.
Alice walked over and managed a perfunctory hug then pulled back, folding her arms over her chest. “Hello, Tanner. Good to see you. How have you been?”
“Good.” He struggled to think of what else to say. Since that horrible conversation when she’d accused him of causing David’s death, every exchange with her was stilted and strained.
The problem was, her accusations—spoken and unspoken—only underlined what he had always thought himself.
If he hadn’t let David stay behind to spend time with that girl, David would still be alive.
Monty walked over to his wife and kissed her lightly on the cheek. “How are you feeling, my dear?” Concern laced his voice and Ellen gave him a faint smile.
“Exactly the same as I did when you left two hours ago to go coffee drinking,” she said, a note of humor in her voice. “Would you like some coffee, Tanner?”
“Sorry, but I’d like to get back to the ranch and catch up on some phone calls and paperwork.” He caught a frown from Alice. “If that’s okay?” he added.
His stepmother shook her head with an expression of regret. “I’m sorry, but you can’t. I thought while I was here taking care of Ellen, I would get some renovations done on the house,” she said. “So it isn’t livable right now. In fact, I’ve been staying here at the ranch the past couple of nights.”
“So you’re saying I should stay somewhere else?”
“Might be a good idea.”
Her voice held a bite that he was too tired to interpret.
“You can stay here,” Monty said, slapping Tanner on the back. “Give you a chance to spend time with your mother, catch up with us. Keep tabs on your saddle’s repair.”
His stepmother didn’t seem pleased with the idea and he guessed that Keira would feel much the same.
“I don’t think so,” Tanner said. “I’ll try to find a place in town instead.”
“Don’t know if you’ll be able to,” Monty said. “There’s some hockey tournament going on this weekend in Saddlebank. Fairly sure the few hotels we got are full. So I guess you’re stuck here.”
Tanner stifled a sigh, feeling as if he was slowly getting pushed into a tight corner. Never a good place to be. “I’m not sure—”
“Not sure about what? We got plenty of room. John is staying in the house his parents used to live in, and our last hired hand quit on us so the bunkhouse is empty. You can stay there. It’s all ready to go. Trust me, its no problem.”
Tanner was about to object again but felt that doing so would make him look ungrateful and un-neighborly. He eased out a smile. “Sure. I guess I can stay. I’m only here for a couple of days.”
“It will take longer than that to fix David’s saddle,” Monty said. “Besides, you can help. You know a few things about saddle repair. You and Keira used to hang out at the shop all the time.”
“David’s saddle?” Alice glanced from Tanner to Monty, looking confused. “Why does Monty need to fix David’s saddle?”
“I’ve been using it all season and it needs some work,” Tanner said, glancing over at his stepmother. “It got a real working over the last time I competed.”
“You’ve been using it this year?” Alice asked.
“All year,” Tanner replied. “It’s been a busy run.”
“When are you ever going to quit the rodeo?” Ellen asked, a note of disappointment lacing her voice. “Surely your mechanic work keeps you busy enough?”
“It does. But I’ve got some good workers who are running it for me. Just hired a foreman last year so I could do this one last circuit.”
“Will this really be the last?” Monty asked. “I know you cowboys. You don’t quit until you’re dragged from the arena on a backboard. Surely you need to decide when the time comes...” He let the sentence fade away but Tanner finished it for him.
“To hang up my rigging and my spurs,” Tanner said. “Yeah. I know. Hopefully this year will be that year.”
“Why are you using David’s saddle?” Alice asked. “Don’t you have your own?”
Tanner was silent a moment, trying to find the right way to answer her.
“I do. But I wanted to finish what David started before...before he died.” It had been two years since David’s death, and those words could still cut like a knife. “So I thought I would use his saddle and dedicate the season to him. I want to take the saddle all the way to the NFR. But it got busted up at the last rodeo. Monty said he would fix it for me so I could finish with it at Las Vegas.”
He hadn’t told Alice what he’d been doing. He had hoped to surprise her after the season was over and give her David’s saddle as a memento. Tell her face-to-face why he did what he did. Hope that, by some miracle, she would grant him some measure of absolution.