The door clicked shut softly.
“Even if you’re not ready to meet her, she’s ready to meet you. You can meet us at the house tonight. Seven Sisters Road off Highway 5. Only house on the block.”
The part of him that was still a child himself wanted to run. He could just write her a check and he’d never have to face the scorching hope in that child’s face again. That was all she wanted from him, anyway.
For one horrible moment, he wondered what it would be like to have one moment of relief from this pain. Numbing this terror. He knew just what would do that for him, but he pushed it out of his head. He was afraid, but he didn’t want the numbness, not really. He just didn’t want to feel unworthy and he wouldn’t give those feelings validation by making them true, by making himself unworthy.
He wasn’t a boy. He wasn’t a child. He was a man. He’d reached for what he wanted with both hands and he’d gotten it. Now it was his job to protect it.
He nodded. “Thank you, Gina.”
She picked up the pen and with a heavy exhale, she scrawled her name and walked out of the room.
When he picked up the pen, it was still warm from her touch. He signed his name next to hers and with every stroke of ink on the page, he felt more confident about his decision.
Gray, however, wasn’t as sure.
As they walked out he said, “If you were going to let them ream you, why did you bother to call me?”
“I honestly don’t know. But I did the right thing.” He was resolute in that knowledge.
“Did you even read it? Did you know you’re paying for medical school?”
“I don’t care. I have it.” Reed shrugged. At the expression on Gray’s face, he added, “Things were different for us as kids.”
“This is the junkie’s sister? How do you know she’s not using?”
“Gina? Never. Not in a million years.” After setting eyes on her again, he knew that as sure as he knew he was breathing.
“This is going to end badly. I can see the explosions from here. This woman is going to take you for everything you’ve got.” He shook his head. “Do you want me to come with you tonight?” Gray asked, in a low tone, almost like he was telling a secret.
“To meet my daughter?” He shook his head. “No.”
“Why didn’t you meet her inside?”
“It just wasn’t right.” He was too afraid, the idea now a reality that scared the shit out of him. And Amanda Jane deserved better than his fear. She didn’t ask to come into the world. Didn’t ask for him to be her father. Didn’t ask for the hand she’d been dealt.
“I get that, man. I really do.” Gray clapped him on the back. “If you don’t need anything else, brother, I’m going to head back to the city.”
“No, I’m good. Thanks.” He supposed he was good—this was as good as it ever got for Reed Hollingsworth.
“ARE YOU READY to get married yet?” Grams said into the phone when she answered it.
“No.” She didn’t bother to tell her grandmother about the meeting at Emma’s office. She probably already knew.
“That’s not what Marie Hart said. She told me that she saw you and Reed and his lawyer at Emma’s. Were you playing pinochle or planning your wedding?” Her grandmother seemed to think pinochle figured into everything.
She sighed with only the smallest bit of exasperation. “If you already knew, why did you ask?”
“Because you didn’t call me. Why don’t you bring Amanda Jane over and we’ll watch some movies, have popcorn, and maybe I’ll even bake cookies.”
“Reed’s coming over tonight.”
“Oh! Call me later.” Her grandmother hung up before she could say anything else.
She shook her head. Maudine had her cell phone attached to her head just like any teenager. Sometimes Gina felt as if she was the old woman and Maudine the grandchild, but only in the vaguest sense.
Gina suddenly had a craving for that ribbon candy. It reminded her of being a child, when things were good. When they were easy.
It had been strange to be sitting across from Reed in a conference room in Emma Grimes’s office.
Strange wasn’t the right word. Utterly insane might be a better description.
He’d switched faces again so easily it was hard to tell which one was real. The Reed who sat in front of her was the investment genius who got everything he wanted no matter who he had to crush to get it. This suit he wore looked like it cost more than a semester of her tuition. And he wanted her to know it.
She didn’t want to look at him like this, but she knew she should be grateful for the reminder. He could never be just Reed again.
Gina thought he’d been there to crush her, to take everything from her, but instead, he’d only given. He’d agreed to everything she wanted. His shark lawyer could’ve made this so hard, but it seemed like all he wanted was exactly what he said—to be a good parent. Giving her and Amanda Jane safety and security.
That wasn’t something she’d ever felt as though she had, so she didn’t quite know what to do with it. She wondered if he felt the same way or if he’d taken to his new life without ever looking back? She imagined the latter. She had to say if she was in his shoes, she’d do the same. She knew she was lucky to have had Maudine.
God, why had she invited him out to the house?
He’d be here any minute.
What was she thinking?
Well, besides that this was going to crash and burn? She sighed. This was the right thing to do. Not just for the financial support, but so that Amanda Jane never doubted she was loved, or that there were people in the world who wanted her. Who would keep her safe.
Gina took a deep breath. This was going to be her life. She might as well start getting used to it.
“Gina, my braids are too tight.” Amanda Jane squirmed underneath her hand.
“Sorry.” She loosened the length of woven hair. “He’s going to be here soon. And I know you won’t sit still then. Your hair won’t tangle if we do it before you sleep.”
“I like his face,” she said solemnly.
That was good because she looked just like him. Gina smiled at her. “Go on now.”
“I think you like his face, too. You get this funny expression when you look at him.”
She’d have to be more careful. “I do like his face.” Gina liked a lot more than his face. “We were friends a long time ago before you were born.”
“Do you think it’s true that he just didn’t want to be a daddy?” Amanda Jane cast her eyes down at her bare feet and wiggled her toes.
Gina didn’t want to lie to her, but she didn’t know the truth. “I don’t know, honey. But I can tell you that sometimes people make mistakes and we have to forgive them when they’re really sorry.”
“Do you think he likes my face?” Amanda Jane tilted her head up.
“How could anyone not like your face?”
She smiled. “You’re supposed to say that.”
“Yes, I am. But do you remember when I promised I’d always tell you the truth?”
“Even