‘How could I forget?’ He had accompanied her every year to lay flowers on her parents’ graves and sat beside her in the churchyard while she’d grieved.
* * *
Jasper studied Jane, wanting to drive away the strife clouding her eyes. He’d never seen her so weak or vulnerable but, like him, their time apart had changed her. She’d been cast aside by his brother, humiliated in front of everyone, then left to linger as a spinster. He wouldn’t treat her so shabbily, but she’d asked for an openness he couldn’t bestow, all the while having no idea what she was asking for. He couldn’t tell her about Mr and Mrs Robillard and risk her recoiling from him. Nor could he embroil her in the business of the hell and make her as dirty as him.
‘Well, Jasper?’ she prodded.
He might not be able to tell her everything about the hell or his past, but he could share his current situation with her—if not the worst parts of it, then certainly the best. He could help her to enjoy life the way he intended to after so much death and find a way to make sure the darkness never touched either of them again. He took her hand and met her steady gaze. ‘I don’t want you for mere convenience. I want you because you are my closest friend. I promise I will respect you as you deserve and be as open and honest with you as I can be.’
A hope he hadn’t seen in anyone, including himself, since well before the epidemic brightened her face. It lightened some of Jasper’s strain. In her innocence, she believed all would be well. With her beside him, perhaps it would be. ‘We must speak to Philip at once so he can make arrangements. I’m sure he won’t object.’
* * *
‘I do not give my consent.’
Jane stared at her brother, dumbfounded. Laura peered back and forth between the couple and her husband, as shocked as Jane. Jasper stood casually beside her, hands crossed in front of him, hat dangling from his fingers as if their future together wasn’t at risk. It irritated her more than it comforted her, adding to her annoyance at Philip’s answer.
‘What do you mean you don’t consent?’
Philip folded his hands over the blotter. ‘I have reason to doubt the veracity of Mr Charton’s interest in you.’
‘The veracity of his interest?’ She forced herself not to shift on her feet and to face him as she would a difficult butcher trying to overcharge her for poor-quality meat. She recognised this look; it was the one he used to give her whenever she’d ask to go to the milliner’s for a new dress. He’d always suspected her of choosing something much too adult for her young years, and he’d been right. At thirteen, almost everything she’d done had been to test him, to prove to everyone she was no longer a child but a young woman capable of making her own decisions. It had taken Mrs Hale’s gentle guidance to make her realise she was not yet an adult and there was no reason to look older simply to spite the world. However, she was an adult now and she wouldn’t cave under his scrutiny.
‘He did his best to dissuade you from a union yesterday and now he wishes for your hand. I want to know why,’ Philip explained to her, not Jasper.
‘He wasn’t against it. He was merely surprised by the way I went about discussing the matter. Even you said it was ill-advised.’ Her conceding the point didn’t ease the stern set of her brother’s jaw. ‘Since he’s had some time to consider it, he’s come to realise, as I have, we’re still good friends and it would be a perfect union. Don’t you agree?’ She took Jasper’s hand, demonstrating some affection, but careful not to overdo it. If she told Philip the two of them were madly in love, it would make him even more sceptical.
‘I do.’ The lightness in Jasper’s answer made her wonder if he realised how in danger of having their plans thwarted they stood. She might be over the legal age to marry, but they needed Philip to obtain a common licence and arrange the church, and anyway, she wanted his consent. She was going to have to lie about the true source of Jasper’s income, she didn’t wish also to sneak behind her brother’s back to the altar.
Philip eyed Jasper with hard scrutiny. ‘I’d like to speak with Mr Charton, alone.’
Jane threw Jasper a wary look, but he didn’t appear ruffled by the requested interview. Instead, he nodded to let her know all would be well. She hoped so. The idea of having yet another one of her plans fail irked her.
* * *
‘I can’t believe Philip is being so difficult,’ Jane complained to a sympathetic Laura when they were alone together in the front sitting room.
‘He’s doing what he believes best for you,’ Laura explained, despite the perplexed crease between her brows. Evidently, Philip’s behaviour baffled her, too. ‘He always has.’
‘I’ve decided what’s best for me and it’s Jasper.’ Jane dropped on to the sofa near the window.
Laura didn’t argue with her and Jane was almost disappointed. She craved a little vigorous debate. It wasn’t just Laura and Philip who were sceptical. She had her own doubts and they’d been nagging at her since they’d left the garden to speak with her brother. She wondered if there was anything about Jasper she should be concerned with. If there was, Philip was sure to sniff it out. Oh, how he irritated her; she wanted to rely on her own intuition and judgement and stop being dependent on his.
‘Mr Charton strikes me as a very charming and persuasive gentleman. I’m sure he’ll bring your brother around.’ Laura sat down beside her. ‘Though I do wonder how you two arranged all this in so short an amount of time.’
Jane stopped fiddling with the tassel on a pillow and stared at her sister-in-law. Do she and Philip know I slipped out with Jasper last night? No, it wasn’t possible. Philip’s men might be very astute and loyal to him, but they weren’t infallible, as Laura had proven when she’d crept in here. She hadn’t even had the advantage of Jane telling her the best way to do it. Since then, she’d won Philip’s heart and had helped him to move past the grief which had left him distant and closed off from everyone including, at times, her.
She wondered if she and Jasper might ever come to have a relationship like Philip and Laura’s. Love hadn’t been a part of their negotiations. Good. It was better if she never expected it as then she’d never be disappointed. Besides, she was too old to fantasise about romantic nonsense. Compatibility was more valuable than a passion, even if it dampened instead of ignited her heart. She’d believed in love once and maybe some small part of her still did. It didn’t matter. This was an excellent arrangement. She hoped Philip realised it, too. In the meantime, there was Laura’s scrutiny to address.
‘I chanced to meet Jasper while leaving Mrs Fairley’s yesterday afternoon. We had a very long discussion on the matter.’ It was a shady version of the truth, omitting the more scandalous details of his having slipped into her bedroom to spirit her away to a gambling hell in the middle of the night. She wondered if she should mention at least the leaving with him in the middle of the night part to force Philip’s hand. However, if he hadn’t marched her and Jasper up the aisle after the incident at the Chartons’, she doubted he’d insist on a marriage because of some late-night escapade. Philip was much too level-headed to act out of emotion, which further worried her about his conversation with Jasper. She hoped Jasper was managing well.
‘And what did you discuss with Mr Charton?’ Laura leaned forward in the same manner Mrs Hale used to do when she and Jane shared gossip. It was almost enough for Jane to drop her voice and tell her the truth, the way she used to with Laura’s mother. She missed the old intimacy, connection and friendship. It’d never come easy to Jane except with Mrs Hale, and Jasper, but not even they knew the darkest guilt she carried about her parents’ death, nor could she tell them about the hell. Jasper had sworn her to silence and she would be worthy of his faith in her.
‘We discussed his business and how I could help him with it.’ If Jasper was working to win Philip over, then Jane must do the same with Laura.
‘You two discussed business?’