This would make a good photo.
The thought was enough to sober him up completely. ‘And to think,’ he said just a little too flatly, ‘if you’d been wearing flats we might not even be married.’
‘No,’ Alyse agreed, all traces of laughter gone from her face. ‘We might not be.’ They stared at each other for a moment, and this time Leo felt a certain bleakness in their shared look. Their engagement—their whole lives, entwined as they were—had hinged on something so trivial. So ridiculous.
Why did the thought—which wouldn’t have bothered him a bit before; hell, he’d have appreciated the irony—make him feel almost sad now? Sad not just for himself but for Alyse, for the way her eyes shuttered and her mouth twisted, and the warmth and ease they’d been sharing seemed to disappear completely.
He needed to put a stop to this somehow. He needed to stop wondering, stop feeling so damn much. The trouble was, he didn’t know how to stop it. And, worse, part of him didn’t even want to.
Alyse knew she shouldn’t be hurt by Leo’s observation. It was no more than the truth, the truth she’d known all along. Yet the reminder stung, when for the first time they’d actually seemed to be enjoying each other’s company.
Not wanting Leo to see how absurdly hurt she felt, she rose from the table and headed for the buffet, filling her plate up with a variety of tempting items. Leo followed, and by the time they were both back at the table her composure was firmly restored.
‘So,’ she said, spearing a piece of papaya, ‘your turn. Secret fear, embarrassing moment, funny dream. Take your pick.’
‘I don’t have any of those,’ Leo answered. She watched him neatly break a croissant in two and rolled her eyes.
‘Come on, Leo. You’re not a robot. You’re a man with feelings and thoughts, hopes and fears. You’re human. Aren’t you? Or am I going to roll over in bed one night and see a little key in the back of your neck, like that Dr Who episode with the creepy dolls?’
His eyebrows lifted. ‘Creepy dolls?’
‘Haven’t you ever watched that television programme?’
‘I don’t watch television.’
She let out a laugh. ‘You really are a robot.’
‘Ah, you’ve discovered my one deep secret. And here I thought I hid it so well.’
She laughed again, and his answering smile made everything in her lighten and lift. They’d never, ever joked around before. Teased each other. Enjoyed each other. It was as heady as a drug, his smile, his light tone. She craved more, and she knew just how dangerous and foolhardy that was.
Leo had made it abundantly clear last night. As long as it’s enough for you.
Already she knew it wasn’t.
‘All right, then,’ she said, taking a pastry from her plate. ‘No secret fears, funny dreams, or embarrassing moments. How about hobbies, then?’
‘Hobbies?’ he repeated in something so close to incredulity that Alyse nearly laughed.
‘Yes, you have heard of them? Pleasant pastimes such as reading, gardening, stamp-collecting?’ He simply stared and she supplied helpfully, ‘Tennis? Golf? Pottery?’
‘Pottery? I thought macramé was bad enough.’
‘You must do something to unwind.’
He arched an eyebrow. ‘Do I seem unwound to you?’
‘Now that you mention it...maybe I should suggest something? Watercolours, perhaps?’
His lips twitched and he shook his head. ‘I play chess.’
‘Chess?’ She smiled, felt the sweet thrill of a small victory. ‘I should have been able to guess that.’
‘Oh? How so?’
‘Chess is a game requiring patience and precision. You have both in spades.’
‘I’m not sure that was a compliment,’ he answered. ‘But I’ll take it as one.’
‘Are you very good?’
‘Passable.’
Which probably meant he was amazing. She could picture him in front of a chessboard, his long, tapered fingers caressing the smooth ivory shape of the queen... A shaft of desire blazed through her. She really needed to get a grip if she was fantasising about chess. Well, really, about Leo.
‘Do you play?’ he asked.
‘I’m passable, but probably not as passable as you.’
‘I didn’t know there were degrees of passable.’
‘There is when I feel your “passable” is a gross understatement.’
‘We’ll have to have a match.’
‘You’ll trounce me, I’m sure.’ Yet the thought of playing chess—really, of doing anything with him—made her spirits lift. See? she wanted to say. We are friends. This is working.
But she still wanted more.
‘So.’ Leo pushed his plate away and nodded to hers. ‘Are you finished? I’ll just speak to the staff about arranging the snorkelling.’
Alyse watched him stride away as she sipped the last of her coffee. Despite her fledgling hope, she still wished that they were a normal couple. That this was a normal honeymoon. That Leo was striding away with a spring in his step instead of a man resigned to a lifetime of duty. That they’d spent last night wrapped in each other’s arms, lost in mutual pleasure, instead of lying next to each other as rigid as two cadavers in a mortuary.
She could go on and on, Alyse knew, pointlessly wishing things had been different before, were different now. She forced herself to stop. This was what she had to deal with, to accept and make work. And this morning had been a beginning, a hopeful one. She needed to focus on that and let it be enough, for now at least. Maybe for ever.
Half an hour later they’d changed into swimsuits underneath tee-shirts and shorts and Leo was leading the way along the beach to where a gorgeous catamaran was pulled up on the sand.
Alyse came to a stop in front of the boat. ‘Are we going in that?’
‘I arranged it with the staff. I thought we’d have a better time if we could go out a bit farther.’ He glanced at her, his brows knitted together in a frown. ‘Are you all right with boats? I know some people are afraid of open water.’
His thoughtfulness touched her, belated as it was. It really was so confoundedly easy for Leo to affect her, she thought. To make her love him. ‘It’s fine,’ she told him. ‘It’s great, actually. I love sailing.’
And as Leo navigated the boat out into the sea, the sun bathing them both in warm, golden light, Alyse stretched out on the bridge deck, it was great. It was fantastic.
She tilted her head back so the sun bathed her face and felt herself begin to relax, the tension dropping from her shoulders, her body loosening and leaning into the sun. She’d been strung as taut as a bow for far too long; it felt good to unbend.
When they were out on the open water, the sea shimmering in every direction, Leo came and joined her on the bridge deck.
‘You look like you’re enjoying yourself.’
She lowered her head to smile at him, one hand shading her eyes from the dazzling sun. ‘I am. It’s good to be away from it all.’
He sat beside her, his long, muscular legs stretched out next to hers, his hands braced behind him. ‘The media attention was a bit wild these last