“I’ll be with you,” he said gently. “You know, like I was at the snow mound.”
She watched him with wary eyes, and he ached that she had lost her faith in herself. He vowed he’d do whatever he had to do to help her get it back.
“Would we go here at the lodge?” she asked.
“Yes. We could even say we are checking it out for an event for our nonskiers. I’ve got two of them.”
“I didn’t get one. Maybe we can swap one of my snowboarders for your nonskier. It’s always weird to me when people live and work this near the Wasatch Range and they don’t ski.”
“Me, too,” he admitted. “I can see it in Cali because there are so many other sports that people can do, but here? It’s pretty much ski or snowboard. Or, at the very least, ice skate. Speaking of which...you ever try that?”
She shook her head. “I’m not that good at it. Plus, my coach used to like me to focus on my sport.”
“Good idea. My coach said something similar but I did it anyway.”
“Rebel.”
“You know it,” he said.
Lindsey bit her lip, then turned to stare out the window before finally looking back over at him. “I wish I had your courage.”
“You do have it. But in your own way. You are a rebel when you need to be. I’ve seen you when you pass through the gates for the downhill. You look very fierce.”
He had never mentioned it, but the first time he’d noticed Lindsey was after her run. She’d broken the world-record time. He’d been so turned on by her he hadn’t known what to do. She hadn’t been his kind of woman, but then suddenly his body had been, like, hell yeah, she is.
“Thank you, Carter. You know, for an egomaniac, you say some really nice things,” she said, tipping her head to the side to study him.
“I’m not as ego driven as you think I am.”
“Really? You’re not going to convince me.” She checked her watch. “But I can probably take off in about an hour if you want to try the tobogganing idea.”
“Great.” He was shameless where she was concerned, using her love of skiing and her need to be back on her skis as a way to keep him by her side. He wondered if she would still be talking to him after their night together if it wasn’t for the fact that she couldn’t get back on her skis.
It was humbling, and he didn’t like the way it made him feel, so he treated those feelings the way he usually did. He shoved them so far down he could pretend they didn’t exist.
“I’ll go to the concierge and make sure we can get on there and then come back in an hour,” he said. It would probably be a good idea to give her some space so she could miss him.
“Okay. Thanks, Carter,” she said.
“For?”
“Just being a friend.”
Friend. Ugh. He wasn’t about to let her relegate him there. Glancing over his shoulder to make sure no one was nearby, he closed the gap between them and pulled her into his arms. Then he gave her a hot, hard kiss. “We’re more than friends, gorgeous, and don’t you forget it.”
He strode out of her office without looking back, mainly because he didn’t want to seem as if he wanted to know how that kiss had affected her when it had shaken him to his core.
Carter knew he was playing a dangerous game with her. That he wanted something from her that she might give him, but he was trying to keep her from even knowing he wanted. He shook his head and thought of what a sap he was. He wanted to be more than friends and more than lovers, but had never in his life been successful at making any kind of relationship work.
Even his coaches had been short-term before they’d thrown their hands up and walked away. He just wasn’t good at making things last. Usually that didn’t bother him, but the thought of being short-term in Lindsey’s life simply wasn’t acceptable.
* * *
CARTER SENT HER a text telling her he’d meet her at the top of the toboggan run just after lunch. She had one more call to make, to the staff sergeant from Marietta, Montana, that Bradley had told her about.
Lane Scott was one of the men who had been part of the paraplegic ski squad. She’d heard he had recovered and was now running his family’s ranch with his brothers.
“Hello, ma’am,” he said, his voice deep and strong.
“Good afternoon, sir. I’m Lindsey Collins, the ski pro at the Lars Usten Resort in Park City, Utah.”
“The same Lindsey Collins who broke two world records?” he asked.
No, she thought, not anymore. But she couldn’t say that to him. “Yes, I am. I’m calling today because the resorts in Park City are participating in a charity event to get more kids out on the slopes, especially those who can’t afford it. We’re doing a kickoff event in mid-February and we were hoping some of you military guys might want to join us in the exhibition event.”
“Mid-February? I think I can make it. It’s not like I have to be in Marietta on Valentine’s Day,” he said good-naturedly. “What kind of event is it?”
“Well, I’m captaining one team and snowboarder Carter Shaw is the captain of the other one. We have local celebs and executives from the different resorts on our teams and we are each raising money for the fall event as well as getting some press for it.”
“Sounds interesting. Where do my men and I fit in?”
She took a breath. “Well, your team was brought up because we know there are some kids in your situation that might not be aware they can still participate in sports. No offense. I hope you understand how I meant that...” She was feeling flustered because she wasn’t sure if she’d phrased her comments right.
He chuckled. “I get it. A lot of people see losing a limb or two as the end of their outdoor life. I’d love to participate, and I think I can get one or two others to do it, as well. If it’s okay with you, we’ll just be a part of your two established teams. No need for us to be singled out.”
“That sounds great. I’ll text you my email address. Just send me your details and I’ll get you all set up with the committee so you can be up-to-date on the plans. They’ll assign you to a team.”
“I hope I get to ski with you,” Lane said.
“Me, too. I’ll put in a good word. Thanks, Lane.”
“Thank you for thinking of us,” he said.
Lindsey hung up the phone and was moved by the fact that Lane and his buddies hadn’t let an injury slow them down. She was going to use their courage to motivate herself. And in all honesty, she was fine. So why was she struggling so hard to get back on the snow?
Once Lane’s information came through, she forwarded it to the committee and then headed out to meet Carter. As she walked up the trail to the toboggan course, she put on her sunglasses and applied the lip balm of the company that used to sponsor her.
In the summer the lodge used the course, as well. It was one of the many year-round attractions that made Park City so perfect for families. But today she wasn’t thinking about the fact that she had a job. Today she was thinking about her flaws. Her own shortcomings, and why other people had been able to get back on the snow and she hadn’t. Her coach had sent one of his newest talents to meet with her over the Christmas break, and she suspected he’d meant it to motivate her, but all it had done was make it even harder for her to get back out there.
She wasn’t young and untried. She had broken two world records and still held one of them. But she was afraid that was all in her past. It was hard to stare at your