‘Really?’
‘Sure. Why not?’
‘I just... I don’t know.’
‘Oh, I see.’ He grins, putting the book down and moving closer. ‘You’re surprised I can actually read, right?’
‘No!’ I deny, my cheeks burning. ‘It’s just not very...rock and roll.’
‘So what do you think I do with my spare time? Snort cocaine and trash hotel rooms?’
I wrinkle my nose. If anything, he’s a complete neat freak. Oh, he’s sexily dishevelled in his personal appearance, but he makes his own bed each morning and tidies up after himself.
‘I don’t really like the whole housekeeping thing,’ he said, when I asked him about it.
‘Yeah. Sleep with supermodels—that kind of thing.’
He laughs. ‘How boring the reality must seem.’
I grin. ‘You’re not boring, Mr Ash.’
‘I’m glad to hear it, Miss Douglas.’
He moves closer and so do I, drawn as ever by that inevitable pull. He smells insanely good. It is dark outside now, and his hotel room is warm. I know I will need to leave soon, get home and get ready for work the next day, but I am reluctant to bring our weekend to an end.
I should be worried by that, but I cling to our agreement and trust in my own strength. He’ll go, and I’ll be fine.
I ignore the strange presentiment of emptiness that fills me.
‘I have a question for you.’
I lift myself up and straddle him, smiling at his immediate look of desire. At the way I feel him harden beneath me.
‘I’m yours. Ask me anything.’
My laugh is soft and husky. ‘Anything? Hmm... Maybe I don’t want to waste that on this question.’
‘You can ask me anything. Again and again.’
His generosity, sweetness and openness are beautiful.
But didn’t I feel that about Jeremy?
‘You’re amazing. I can’t believe I got so lucky as to have you in my life. Ally, marry me. Please. I want to spend every morning waking up beside you...’
God!
An acidic taste permeates my mouth. I focus on Ethan beneath me. Ethan who’s holding my hands. Ethan who’s pulling me into his world with no expectations or strings.
‘Where does Grayson go when you’re up here?’
‘Grayson?’ He pulls a face. ‘I don’t know if I want to think about him right now.’
I grin. ‘Sorry. I was just wondering if he’s, like, sitting outside the door, waiting for you to call.’
‘He has a room on the same floor,’ Ethan says after a small beat of time.
‘And how does it work? If you go out you text him and he has to stop whatever he’s doing...?’
‘I try to give him notice if I’m changing the schedule.’
‘And he’s your bodyguard?’
‘Yeah. Technically he’s my driver, but he’s ex-military, ex-cop, a martial arts expert. You wouldn’t want to be on his bad side.’
‘Wow. I had no idea.’
‘Plus, I trust him completely. He’s been with me for over seven years.’
‘He doesn’t have family?’
Ethan shakes his head slowly. ‘He was married once.’
‘It didn’t work out?’
Ethan looks over my shoulder. And despite the fact that he said I could ask him anything I sense that he’s feeling awkward about betraying his friend’s trust.
I lean forward and hover my lips just above his. Close enough that I can feel his breath but not touching him. ‘It doesn’t matter. It’s not my business.’
‘It’s no secret,’ he murmurs, not attempting to bring himself closer.
But then he shifts his hips a little, so I feel his hard cock between my legs. Desire shreds me. How can I want him again? All we have done today is touch, kiss, feel, make love, doze, eat and repeat. Suddenly the thought of going days without being able to have him whenever I want is anathema.
All the more reason for me to get the hell out of Dodge and prove to myself that I can live without the wonder that is Ethan Ash.
‘She died.’
It’s ice water on my flaming needs. ‘What? Who?’
‘Grayson’s wife. Matilda. A car crash.’
‘Oh, God. That’s awful.’
‘Yeah. It was years ago. Before I knew him. But so far as I know he hasn’t dated since.’
‘That’s so sad,’ I murmur, thinking of Grayson’s faithfulness to his wife.
‘There’s no guarantees in life, right? You just have to make the most of what you’ve got. Every day.’
He buzzes his lips over mine, lightly, sweetly, just so I get the faintest hint of him before he pulls away.
‘Speaking of Grayson—are we going to be needing him tonight?’
I arch a brow. ‘Threesomes aren’t really my thing.’
‘Then you’re missing out,’ he teases. ‘I meant do we need him to take you home?’
I draw my brows together and his finger lifts to the little divot between my eyes.
‘I want you to stay,’ he pushes on, the words roughened, ‘but I presume you’re going to do your disappearing act sometime soon?’
‘Right.’
I nod, but my body is screaming at me to stop being so stupid. What harm will it cause if I’m late in tomorrow? I can stay here. Spend the night in his bed and then cab it home early. It’s no biggie, right?
But then what? Two nights in a row is habit-forming, and I will not let this become a habit. Even if Ethan Ash is more addictive than any substance on earth.
‘I’ll get a cab,’ I murmur.
‘Stay.’ He pushes his fingers into my hair and draws my mouth to his, his kiss one of promise and pleasure.
I surrender to it on a sigh. ‘A little longer.’
A little longer...
I fall into his kiss. I have been wearing a shirt of his all day. He pushes at the fabric, lifting it up, and I obligingly raise my arms, making it easier, so that I am straddling him wearing only a flimsy pair of lace panties. His mouth drops to my breasts and I cry out as his tongue rolls over the flesh that is already so sensitive. His fingers run down my back and there is something so reverential in his touch, as though I am an object he was born to worship, that I feel a strange emotion lurch inside me.
His hands slip beneath the elastic of my underwear and he cups my ass, pulling me closer to him. I press myself down. Were it not for the barrier of clothing we would be together, and I want that.
I want everything.
It is never enough.
Should I have known that from the beginning?
Should I have understood how dangerous it is to play with fire?