How had his life unravelled so completely in so little time?
Seb could feel it, spiralling out of his control, spinning his mind in tight circles until his head ached from trying to understand it all. His heart was too heavy in his chest, beating a sluggish, determined rhythm, reminding him that he, at least, still lived—even if his parents didn’t. That he still had a job to do, even if the one he’d expected had been taken away. That he still wanted, and felt, even loved—even if his wife had left him and his son didn’t recognise him.
God, Frankie. Maria.
He needed air. Cold, shocking, numbing air.
Good job he was in Mont Coeur.
Letting go of his support sofa, Seb staggered to the door and flung it open, gulping in the icy breeze as it hit his face. Then he stepped through onto the veranda, and stared out at the darkening mountains.
There was a whole world out there. So why did it feel like his had disappeared for good?
‘Sebastian?’ Leo’s voice came from behind him as he joined him on the veranda. ‘Are you okay? You look... Is it Noemi’s news?’
Seb barked a laugh. Noemi, his baby sister, a princess. A pregnant princess, at that.
At least one of them had gone after the life they’d wanted and had found it.
No, two of them. Leo seemed almost offensively happy with his new girlfriend, Anissa. They’d shared secret smiles and small touches and whispered jokes since they’d arrived, too, just like Noemi and Max. So clearly a pair, a couple—in a way he and Maria never had been. No doubt Max and his sister would be settling into what had once been his master suite in the chalet with babies and joy, taking over his home as easily as Leo had taken over his business.
‘Okay, look, why don’t we sit for a moment?’ Leo’s voice, calm and soothing, made Seb feel instantly guilty for his thoughts. As much as Seb resented being pushed out of the family business, even he had to admit it wasn’t Leo’s fault. He couldn’t blame his brother for the circumstances of his birth, the lies their parents had told, or even the will they had left behind them.
Much as he might wish he could.
Seb was a logical, rational man. He had to be, to be a success in his business. His father had instilled in him from birth the weight of expectation, the obligations Seb had to his family. And Seb had given everything he could to live up to them. He’d worked hard, done everything that had been asked of him.
And still it hadn’t been enough.
Not for his father, not for Maria, not for anybody.
He wasn’t enough.
Leo’s arm over his shoulder was a heavy weight leading him to the wooden bench on the veranda and pressing him down onto it.
Maybe if he’d had a big brother all along, rather than discovering him at the age of thirty-two, things would have been different. But he hadn’t.
‘Do you ever feel like your whole life is unravelling in front of you, and you can’t move fast enough to piece it back together?’ His voice didn’t even sound like his, Seb realised. Too low, too raw. Too desperate.
But Leo just laughed, a darkly amused sound Seb hadn’t heard from him before.
‘What do you think?’ Leo asked. ‘I spent my whole life thinking that no one wanted me, that my own parents had thrown me away, only to discover one day that they’d been searching for me almost my whole life. And then, when I was ready to meet them, they died before I got the chance.’
‘And you got stuck with me and Noemi instead.’ Yeah, that must have been a pretty big let-down.
‘Actually, I kind of think of the two of you as an unexpected bonus. A silver lining maybe,’ Leo said, and Seb looked up, surprised.
‘What do you mean?’
‘Well, I thought I’d lost any chance of ever having a family. Then I came here and met you two, and then Anissa...and now there’s Max and Maria and Frankie, plus Noemi’s babies. Suddenly I have more family than I know what to do with.’
‘Maria and Frankie aren’t staying.’ Seb’s mood dropped again at the reminder.
‘Ah.’
‘Yeah.’
Leo stretched his legs out in front of him, leaning back against the bench. Almost unconsciously, Sebastian followed suit. Leo’s legs were longer than his, he realised, even though they were more or less the same height. Yeah, being the little brother really was going to take some getting used to.
‘Do you remember what you told me when I called you from New York?’ Leo asked, after a long moment of silence.
Seb tipped his head back and tried to remember. It had only been a handful of weeks ago now, but somehow it felt longer. Like his whole world had shifted again since then, with everyone coming home to Mont Coeur.
Leo had been in New York with Anissa, wooing her, or whatever it was that smooth, American-raised secret older brothers did. But he’d screwed it up—Seb had to admit that slight sign of fallibility had made it easier to warm to Leo—and Anissa had run when Leo had asked her to stay with him.
‘I told you to wait,’ he said finally.
‘You said that if I loved her, I had to give her space and respect her decision,’ Leo corrected. ‘That I had to let love decide what happened next. And that I should let Anissa come back to me—if she wanted to.’
‘And she did, of course.’ And now they were blissfully happy. Good for them.
‘So did Maria,’ Leo pointed out. ‘I mean, she’s here for Christmas, isn’t she?’
‘Only because I called and asked her to come.’ Okay, begged. It wasn’t a moment his pride felt particularly good about. ‘And like I said, she’s not staying.’
He’d given her space. He’d respected her choices. And it hadn’t made one bit of difference.
Leo sighed, and Seb couldn’t help but feel he wasn’t getting whatever point his older brother was trying to make.
‘What I’m saying is...you gave me some good advice, and I’m glad I followed it. But I can’t help but think you’ve been following your own advice a little too long.’
‘Too long?’ Seb frowned.
‘Maria’s been gone for, what? A year?’ Leo asked.
‘About that.’ Sebastian couldn’t bring himself to admit that he knew it was, in fact, twelve months and fifteen days.
‘Well, waiting on love is all very well and good. But maybe sometimes love needs a bit of a push. A bit of effort.’
Love. He loved Maria—of course he did. She’d always been a part of his life, part of the family, and he loved her as much as he loved Noemi or his parents. But theirs had never been a romance as such.
Maybe that was what had been missing. Something to think about at least.
Leo cleared his throat, obviously a little uncomfortable about the very personal turn the conversation had taken. They didn’t really know each other well enough to be baring their souls, Sebastian thought. He’d been astonished when Leo had called him from New York to ask what he should do about Anissa—until he’d realised that his brother simply didn’t have anyone else to talk to about such things.
And neither, it seemed, did he. Noemi would be firmly on Maria’s side, as always. His parents were gone, and his other friends, business acquaintances...he’d never even told them Maria had left in the first place. He’d had to keep up the facade of the