‘I feel sick too,’ Mike said, echoing my own sentiments. ‘Six? You say she’s six?’ He shook his head. ‘And her parents are filming her for paedophiles? I honestly just can’t imagine anything more terrible.’
John sipped his coffee. ‘Yes, six, and an only child, thank God. Which is not to say the couple haven’t …’
‘Jesus,’ said Mike. ‘It’s so sick.’
‘But she’s safe now. The police acted swiftly, thank goodness. She’s safe with us now.’
‘Since when?’ I asked.
‘Since two hours ago.’
‘At the office?’
He nodded. ‘But look – listen, both – don’t say yes if you don’t think …’
‘How could we possibly say no, John? God!’ I said. ‘What kind of a state must she be in?’ I tried to imagine what kind of mental turmoil the child was in. Had she been held prisoner in her own home? Forced to ‘perform’ under threat? Would she be glad to have escaped? Desperate? Hysterical? Or, on the other hand – and the thought crept unavoidably into my brain – was she more distressed at being taken away from all she knew? Was what she’d been forced to do her version of normal?
Mike and I exchanged glances. I knew his thought processes would be similar. A few years previously we’d fostered siblings who’d been born into a family that were at the centre of a terrifyingly huge paedophile ring. The older one, Ashton, was his grandfather’s son – one of several children he’d sired with his own daughters. Most chillingly, however, was that, groomed virtually from birth, these two terrified innocents had been distressed, no doubt about it, but not about the sexual abuse, which for them was just another way of showing love – no, they were distressed at being taken from their ever-loving granddad.
Hearing the shouts and whoops of my own grandchildren coming from the other room, my heart felt suddenly leaden. ‘Then go and fetch her,’ I told John, returning Mike’s affirmative nod. ‘Bring her here. Of course we’ll have her. That’s settled.’
John’s frown lines smoothed out slightly. A box had been ticked. A problem shared and halved. ‘Thank you,’ he said, and I knew he really meant it. ‘I knew I could depend on you two. And, of course, I’ll go back and organise for her to be brought to you right away. But you need to be aware of what you are taking on. Seriously. I know you’ve a lot of experience of this sort of thing –’ He spread his palms. ‘Would that it were otherwise, eh? But this appears to be a severely damaged little girl. And in all kinds of ways. It’s in a different league, honestly –’
Mike laughed grimly. ‘You said it, mate. Sheesh. You’re telling me.’
‘Horrific,’ John agreed.
‘And the parents,’ I said, thinking suddenly about the monsters who’d done this evil. ‘What’s happened to them now?’
‘Arrested,’ John said. ‘Not sure what’s happening next there. But if you’re absolutely sure you’re happy to take little Darby, even if just in the short term, I’ll go back and sort things. She’s already been allocated a social worker – though I’ve not met her myself yet – and she’s the one who’ll bring Darby over to you. Say an hour or so?’ He glanced back towards the kitchen, sniffing the air. ‘Give you time to have your dinner at least.’
Dinner, understandably, was the last thing on my mind. And, unsurprisingly, I had entirely lost my appetite. We ate anyway, because, aside from everything else, the rest of the family were all starving – all bar Tyler, who pitched up not long after John had left us, and in doing so reminding me why we did what we did. I hugged him extra hard, as if he were a living, breathing talisman against the evil that was going to come and visit, in the shape of the reality it forced into our minds.
We told Riley the bare minimum, and a white lie to Kieron – he found any kind of child abuse extremely distressing, so we simply said her parents had been arrested for unrelated offences, which, having no other family, had left her with nowhere to go over Christmas.
We also took the decision to end the family gathering early. Again, the kids were used to such things, and, with Christmas still to come, the little ones weren’t bothered either. We just explained to Levi and Jackson that we were taking in a little girl over Christmas and, so she wouldn’t be too traumatised, we needed a slightly quieter household when she arrived. Which was probably true anyway. John had told us that she’d been inconsolable. There’d been much clinging and screaming and sobbing apparently. It would be a pretty intense job for the poor social worker.
Levi, who’d just turned nine, was excited. A sociable little chap and a typical eldest, he was always in his element when there was a new young friend to take charge of, and wouldn’t leave without a promise that he’d be meeting her soon, which I was only too happy to make for him. Once she’d settled, I told him, what she’d need would be the same as all kids need. Comfort and routine and to be enveloped in love. ‘I’ll give her lots of hugs, Nana,’ he solemnly promised me.
First of all, however, she’d need a bedroom. So, as soon as we’d waved everyone off (in my case, with a pang of regret, as I watched the cars disappear down the road, Mike and Tyler in one of them, taking Kieron, Lauren and a rudely awoken Dee Dee) I hotfooted it upstairs to the bedroom.
Which wasn’t so much bedroom as junk room just lately. Since little Paulie had left it had slowly reassigned itself, almost without me realising it was happening. Knowing we’d not be needing it for a good while, we’d both found it all too easy to say ‘I’ll just pop this here’ and ‘It can stay there for the moment,’ and to such an extent that there was very little floor space – particularly since Mike had one of his major garage clear-outs and earmarked a ridiculous amount of stuff to go on eBay. ‘Yeah, right, Dad,’ Tyler had said. I remembered that well now. ‘Yeah, right, bet you a tenner it’ll still be here this time next year.’ Though to his credit, he’d downloaded some ‘app’ (apps were still something of a mystery to me) and managed to sell a good deal more than a tenner’s worth, at a hard-won but decent commission.
Still, there was a fair bit that still needed shifting, not to mention the fact that our Christmas presents were all stored there, safely away from several pairs of prying eyes, till such time as I poured myself an eggnog, popped on a favourite Christmas movie and settled down to wrap them in peace.
John had laughed about that, the tension broken as he’d left, having correctly identified the look of sudden stress on my face. ‘Look at her, Mike,’ he said. ‘Full-on panic mode now. Thinking about how she won’t have time to go out buying new curtains and duvets.’
Mike had laughed too. ‘You know her too well, John. But under the circumstances, Casey,’ he’d placed a hand on my shoulder, ‘I don’t think you need to be worrying about that.’
It had set the tone again, that, after our brief moment of levity. He’d been right. What this poor kid needed was a safe place. A sanctuary. Not a frilly duvet and a pair of matching bloody curtains.
Still, she needed a clean space, and this definitely wasn’t that, so once I’d cleared the floor somewhat and piled the presents in our bedroom wardrobe, I ran back downstairs for a bin liner, disinfectant spray and cloth. And then, as an afterthought, ragged the small set of fairy lights from around the hall mirror. After all, they weren’t going to be needed to illuminate any poinsettia, by the looks of things. And, for all that little Darby wouldn’t need a new Frozen quilt cover, she would need a light in her current darkness, however small.
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