His words echoed her feelings. Constantly through the holiday, she had glanced at him, wanting to go somewhere they could be alone to kiss and love and lose themselves as they had the weekend before. At the same time, she knew the hopelessness of getting more deeply entangled with him.
“You and I are way too opposite to get closely involved. You might not care at all and that means nothing to you, but it means a lot to me. You saw my family. My lifestyle and background are totally different from yours. If we continue to make love now, it will mean certain things on an emotional level to me that lovemaking won’t to you. We’ll get more deeply involved with each other. I can’t separate that from my deepest feelings.”
Standing, he reached out to take her into his arms again. “We’ll just kiss. You say when to stop.”
“If we do this, Zach, you’ll have my heart.”
“Maybe you’ll have mine,” he whispered, showering kisses on her temple to her cheek and then on her mouth. He kissed her insistently, holding her close against him, ending her arguments. She wanted him and her hunger overcame the logic, her caution, her arguments. She held him, kissing him with fervor that grew. The weekend had been another chain binding her heart. She held him tightly. She couldn’t stop now. Later, he picked her up, kissing her as he carried her to the closest bedroom to make love to her.
Near dawn she stirred and rolled over to look at Zach who lay sleeping beside her. She rose up, brushing a curl off his forehead. A dark stubble covered his jaw. He was muscled and fit except for his injury that would heal. With their loving and Zach going home with her, he became more appealing each day. It didn’t matter. There was no way he could ever be the man for her. No matter what her heart wanted. They were far too opposite. Even if they both were wildly in love, there was no possibility she could ever accept his lifestyle. She had told him if they continued making love, it would mean more to her and it would hurt deeply when she had to break it off and leave. And should he want her to stay, or wanted to marry her, which was impossible with a man like Zach, she couldn’t accept. Not with his nomadic lifestyle.
While he had been good about the weekend with her family, she suspected there was no likelihood he would ever settle. She hurt and the hurt would grow worse later, but they were mismatched and neither wanted change.
He had met her family now and knew enough about her that he should understand what she told him. She suspected this job would end soon because he had a doctor’s appointment this week and she had noticed he was getting around far better each day.
She studied him, with his shadowy long lashes on his cheeks. As he slept, she took her time. Looking at his firm lips, she thought about their kisses. Unable to resist, she leaned closer to kiss him lightly. His arm banded her waist and his eyes opened lazily. He pulled her close to kiss her to make love. She stopped thinking and gave herself to feeling.
At nine o’clock, she sat up and reached across him to get his phone from a bedside table. “Zach, it’s after nine. We have to—”
He kissed her and stopped her announcement. In minutes he raised his head. “We don’t really have to do anything except stay here in bed.”
“Oh, yes, we do,” she said, stepping out of bed and tugging free the sheet to wrap around herself. “We need to get back to our business relationship. We’re already deep enough in a personal one. It’s time to slow this part down.” He placed his hands behind his head, smiling and watching her.
“I’ll see you in the office,” she said, scurrying out of the room, praying she didn’t encounter Nigel before she got away from Zach and got her clothes back on.
It was an hour before she had showered and dressed in fresh jeans, a blue cotton shirt and loafers. With an eagerness she couldn’t curb, she went downstairs to the office to find Zach sitting behind his desk.
He smiled when she came in and stood to come around his desk. He looked sexy, more appealing than ever in fresh, tight jeans and a black sweater. The warmth in his eyes held her immobile, unable to look away, and her pulse drummed in her ear. Her breath caught as he closed the distance between them to take her into his arms and kiss her a long time.
“Good morning,” he said in a deep voice that was like fur wrapping around her.
“Good morning,” she whispered in return, aware she was in love with him to the extent she might not ever get over it. This was a man she absolutely had to get over. He would never be the man for her and she could never be the woman for him.
“We weren’t going to do this in the office. Use some self-control,” she teased, trying to make light of the moment and end it.
“Sure. For now,” he replied, heading to his desk. As Zach circled his desk, she noticed that he no longer limped and she was certain he would be able to go back to his normal life very soon and would no longer need her. The thought of telling him goodbye hurt with a pain that ran deep. She had faced the truth that she was in love with him. Hurt was inevitable.
They both were busy and lunch was brief, but he ate with her and she was glad. She wanted to be with him and the clock was ticking. Their time together would end too soon. She wanted more than just dining with him, of course, but each time they made love, her heart was bound more tightly with his.
Zach sat with work in front of him, but he couldn’t keep from continually watching Emma. She was filing, moving around from desk to file cabinet, paying no attention to him. The tight jeans molded her hips and long legs. Her hair was tied behind her head with a ribbon and through lunch he had wanted to reach over and untie it.
He should have told her goodbye when they got back last night and he should have eaten lunch on his own today. He thought about her brother; he had meant it when he had told Connor he didn’t want to hurt Emma. He glanced at his desk calendar. He would go to the doctor tomorrow and he suspected he would be told he had recovered and could return to his usual activities, which meant her job would be over.
If someone had bet him everything he owned that he would go home with a secretary who was a homebody deluxe, he would have lost every cent he owned. All during the ride back in the car, he had longed to lean over the seat to kiss her. When they arrived home, their lovemaking was inevitable. He could not resist.
He thought of what she had said in the car about the way he was with his family. Was his solitary life because he didn’t know how to open up with his brothers or risk his emotions again and get them trampled as he had when he was a child?
He was leaving the ranch and the country as soon as he could. He would probably spend Christmas in Italy. He thought about the fun she would have with her family and couldn’t keep from comparing that with thoughts about him rattling around the house in Italy all alone. The Italian home didn’t hold near the appeal it had a month earlier.
Thoughts of her heated him. He wanted her right now and he wanted her in his bed again tonight. What would it be like to marry Emma and have her in his bed each night? The question shocked him because it was the first time he had contemplated even a thought of marriage with any woman he was friends with. How emotionally entangled was he with Emma? She stirred responses and emotions in him no other woman ever had. But there was no way he could have a permanent relationship with her.
She made her choices and she knew the job would end soon and they would part and not see each other again. There was absolutely no future in seeing her after she returned to Dallas. This wasn’t the woman for him. Except in bed. He couldn’t get enough of her there. Just watching her and thinking about her, he was getting aroused.
Knowing he had to get his mind off her and cool down, he turned to pick up the weekend mail, trying to concentrate on business.
It was almost four when Zach’s phone rang. Emma had closed her computer and it looked as if she were clearing her desk to get ready to go. Zach answered the phone