The scent of garlic in Cate and Ruby’s apartment—a remnant of dinner, Luc would guess—made his stomach growl. In his hurry to get here and see Ruby, he’d forgotten to eat. Not a normal occurrence for him.
He sat on Ruby’s bright purple bedspread while she showed him her colorful ponies. He’d already met her collection of dolls.
On his way into Ruby’s room, Luc had given the apartment a quick once-over. The size of a matchbox with everything in its place. So Cate was still the neat freak she’d once been. But the pieces and colors she used in the apartment gave it a comfortable feel. Artistic and homey. Even still, Luc felt strangely claustrophobic. He was used to wide open spaces. The building barely had any grass outside with no playground to be seen.
He had the strangest urge to snap Ruby into his arms, barrel out of here and never come back.
“This one’s my favorite.” Ruby held up a white pony with purple hair.
At times she talked so fast Luc could barely decipher her words. For the most part he’d been drinking her in—watching the nuances that made her unique—while trying not to overdo it with his interest. So far he’d learned she tugged on her earlobe when she was thinking and that she rarely stayed in one position for more than sixty seconds.
See? She needed a ranch for a backyard. But that wasn’t Luc’s focus in being here. It was to discuss the paternity test results with Cate, and then for the two of them to tell Ruby he was her father. He needed to stay on point.
“It’s time to get ready for bed, Rubes.” Cate stood in the doorway to the room, her bare toes peeking inside.
Luc glanced at the small clock on Ruby’s nightstand, surprised to see how much time had passed since he’d arrived.
“But...” Ruby’s brow pinched, her voice escalating to a whine. “But my friend Luc is here.”
Her friend Luc. Sweet girl. Little did she know how her life was about to change. Luc prayed it would be for the better and that she’d adjust without the news harming her or causing turmoil.
“I know,” Cate answered with patience and a hint of weariness, “but it’s getting late and you need your sleep. We can still read a story if you get your pajamas on and brush your teeth.” She infused pep into the last part, but it was lost on Ruby.
A storm of opposition continued to brew in the half-pint in front of him. Luc pushed up from the twin bed, the frame creaking under his added weight. “I need to talk to your mom. I’ll do that while you get ready and then maybe...” He looked to Cate. “Maybe I can read you a book?”
After a moment of hesitancy evidenced by the thumbnail slipping between Cate’s teeth, she nodded.
Luc followed Cate out of the room, shutting the door behind him and stopping in the middle of the living room. If he walked out the space from wall to wall, he’d probably only get in six long strides. Had it shrunk even more while he was with Ruby? Or maybe it was just being near Cate with no daughter as a buffer.
“I got the test results back. Ruby’s mine.” His throat tightened. How had they gotten here? Anger and confusion and sadness all whipped through him like a gust of Colorado wind. “They sent an email a little bit ago.”
No surprise showed on Cate’s features at his announcement. But then, he hadn’t accused her of cheating on him four years ago. The opposite had happened. And it had been the worst moment of his life when he’d denied doing any such thing...and she hadn’t believed him.
Luc couldn’t stand it when someone didn’t trust him. He’d lived that back in high school and then again with Cate, and he had no desire to repeat the scenario.
Cate motioned to her computer. “I haven’t checked my email, so I didn’t get it yet, but I also don’t need it. I know she’s yours.” Weighty silence stretched between them. “But I’m glad you have the answers you need.”
“So now what?”
“I don’t know.” Her hands lifted, their slight shaking gunning for his sympathetic side. He quickly slammed the door on that unwarranted response. “I guess that’s up to you. How involved you want to be. If you want to see Ruby.”
“If?” Heat seared his voice. Was she joking? Didn’t she know him better than that? Cate looked as though she was about to dissolve into an emotional flood, and despite his outrage, Luc didn’t want that. Especially for Ruby’s sake. They didn’t need to start out back in the same boxing ring they’d ended in the last time. He made a second attempt to answer her in a calmer tone. “Of course I want to see her.”
“Then I guess we figure out a plan. A schedule.”
Luc wanted all of Ruby in his life, not a color-coded calendar of planned times. But that was impossible. Even if he did want to transport Ruby out of this place, he couldn’t. Cate would never stand for it. He wasn’t that much of a fool.
“What about telling her?”
Her eyes momentarily closed, fingertips massaging her temples. “I’ve been prepping her as much as I could. I asked her if she’d want to meet her father.”
“What did she say?”
Ruby scampered into the hallway. “I’m gonna brush my teeth, and then I know what book I want my friend Luc to read. Boo-boo bear picked it out. But, Mommy, I still need you to huggle me.”
After that barrage of information, the bathroom door banged shut.
Luc needed a three-year-old translator. “Huggle?”
“Snuggle and hug combined.” Cate’s face softened, the curved lips that surfaced over Ruby enough to take out a man with less resentment propping him up at the knees. “And in answer to your question, you’ve met her—what do you think she said? To Ruby, the more, the merrier. She wants to meet her dad. You.”
“So we’ll tell her tonight?”
The enormousness of his question made filling his lungs an impossible task. It must have affected Cate the same, because her chest stuttered numerous times as it rose and fell.
“Yes.” Sorrow lines surrounded liquid brown pools of remorse. “Luc, I really am sorry.”
And he really didn’t want to hear it right now. One day they’d have to get into the whys. One day he’d have to move toward forgiving her. Today was not that day.
Luc had been talking to God plenty about Ruby and Cate this week, reaching for answers that felt miles away. And while he knew the man upstairs would be nudging him to deal with his ire toward Cate in no time at all, tonight was about telling Ruby the truth.
When he didn’t answer her apology, Cate sucked in a breath too big for her small frame, as if gathering courage. “I need—” her eyes found his and held, pleading “—to know you’re in. Not with me—I get that I’m not high on your list of favorites right now. But for Ruby’s sake, I need to know you’re not just going to cut and run when you figure out being a dad is the hardest thing you’ll ever do. I have to know she can count on you.”
Despite all the wrong that had transpired between them, Cate was right to ask. To protect her daughter—their daughter. A smidgen of respect eased back into play. “I don’t do anything halfway, Cate. So in answer to your question, I’m not going anywhere. I’m in Ruby’s life for good.”
Though Luc didn’t know how they were going to tell Ruby. How to explain why he hadn’t known about her without making Cate look bad. Because no matter what tension ebbed between him and Cate, he wouldn’t start out by maligning Ruby’s mother. He would put their daughter’s needs first.
Luc silently fired off prayers for guidance and wisdom.
Cate’s eyebrows plunked together like magnets. “What are you thinking?”
“I’m praying.”