“I never got married, Cody. That was something I just told my parents. They couldn’t cope with me having a child out of wedlock. I just told them that I eloped with a fellow student to Vegas so it would make them feel better.”
Cody felt the tension slip out of his body. “I’m glad of that. But did you love him? Johnny’s father, I mean.”
“Yes. I loved him very much, and I know he loved me.”
Cody felt sick to his stomach. Why had he even asked that question?
Laura took his hand. “You never answered me. Could you accept Johnny?”
“Of course!” Cody answered almost immediately. “You didn’t even have to ask me that. I can’t wait to meet him.”
“You will—someday.”
“And I don’t care who the college dude is.” Cody couldn’t get the picture of Laura sleeping with someone else out of his head. Aw...hell.
“Johnny’s the light of my life.”
“He should be.”
“I don’t have any regrets, not one,” she said strongly. “Well, maybe one.”
“What’s that?”
“That Johnny’s father doesn’t know he’s the father of such a wonderful boy.”
“He doesn’t? Then you should tell him, Laura. A man has the right to know.”
“I’ll tell him.” She remained silent for several heartbeats. “When some important matters get resolved. I don’t want Johnny stuck in the middle of a power struggle. Anyway, when the time is right, I’ll tell Johnny’s father about him.”
“When the time is right?” Cody shook his head. “How old did you say Johnny was?”
“He’s going to be...uh...four.”
“That’s a long time to keep a boy from his father.”
“I know, Cody. I know. But there are circumstances...”
“Like what?”
Cody had such strong feelings about this. He found it hard to understand why Laura wanted things to stay as they were.
“Let’s just drop it. I’ll take care of Johnny’s father in my own sweet time.”
“You’ve already wasted four years of two lives. If I was a father, I sure as hell would want to know, and would want to participate in raising my child.” Cody shook his head. “I don’t understand you, Laura.”
“Some guys are not like you,” Laura shouted, wondering where her anger came from.
“If the college dude doesn’t want Johnny, I’ll help you raise him. I’ll raise him as if he were my own.”
“And risk me losing him altogether because you have a criminal record for killing someone, even though you didn’t do it?” A fresh gathering of tears glinted in her eyes, and she closed them and let the tears fall. “It’s all such a big mess.”
“We can’t let anyone take Johnny away from you. We just can’t.”
She liked how he said “we,” but it was really all up to her. She had to handle her parents even more carefully now that Cody was out of prison.
Yes, it was all a big mess, and Laura wondered how to make things neat and tidy.
But that was impossible. They all were headed for a big explosion, and there’d be no turning back.
Cody took her hand and started down the path that led to the Duke Ranch and her cute little cottage. He must have seen the surprise on Laura’s face because he shrugged and said, “What? Do you think I’d let you walk home alone? This entire area is loaded with parolees.”
She chuckled. Cody never stayed mad for very long—at least when it concerned her.
“I wish you could come inside and see my home, mine and Johnny’s.”
“I’d love to, but I don’t dare.” He sighed. “I was kind of surprised that you weren’t staying in the ranch house.”
“Johnny and I need our space.”
“Good idea.”
“But we’re up there a lot,” Laura explained. “Johnny has a room there for naps and all. Besides, Clarissa and my parents are built-in babysitters when I need them.”
She could feel pain radiating from him like a living thing. It was the same pain she felt. They were both trapped in Duke Springs, at least for the next two years.
“J.W. will blackball you from working anywhere around here, even after you are done with parole, unless you sell the Double M to him.”
“That’s pretty much what I figured out, and that’s why, if we have any chance of happiness together, we’ll have to move far away from his tentacles. Maybe Washington State or Oregon. Montana. I was even thinking of Canada.”
“That’s really far. I don’t know.”
But she did know. No matter how much she loved Cody, she couldn’t take Johnny away from her family and friends.
“A picnic,” she blurted, stopping in her tracks.
“What?”
“Let’s take Johnny on a picnic.” It was time for something fun.
“How are we going to pull that off?”
“Easy. This Sunday is the annual church picnic, and I am going to present a check from the Duke Foundation to go toward a new roof and steeple. They are having an old-fashioned box-lunch auction. If you win the auction on my box lunch, you get to have lunch with me.”
He shook his head. “You and I having a picnic together? That’ll get back to your parents within seconds.”
“My parents will be at a horse auction in Gila Bend. Besides, the box lunch is supposed to be anonymous, but mine will have a red, white and blue ribbon on it. Bid on it, and keep bidding, no matter the cost. I know you haven’t gotten paid yet. I’ll give you the money.”
“I earned some money in prison. Making license plates doesn’t pay as well as it did before, but I have twenty-three whole bucks, so don’t worry about it.” He was joking, but it saddened Laura to think of him inside doing that instead of working with horses and being on the Double M.
He dropped her hand and stuffed his into the pocket of his jeans. “Laura, it’s not going to work.”
“Of course it will. If my parents find out, I’ll just explain that there was no way you knew that box was mine, and that I had to have lunch with you due to the rules of the auction.”
“Sweetheart, I can’t go to the picnic. I’ll get the big snub from the good folks of the church. I don’t think you’re ready for that, and I don’t want to subject Johnny to any talk about his mother being with a killer.”
Laura looked deep into Cody’s eyes. By the light of the full moon, she could see the pain in them. “I’ve thought about that, Cody. But these people are your friends. A lot of them stood by you in court.”
“A lot of them wanted my head on a platter,” he snapped.
She took his hand. “We’ll go off on our own to have lunch—me, you and Johnny. I don’t care about people talking about us, but if we’re far enough away from people when we have our picnic, Johnny won’t hear anything.”
“I