‘You don’t think the Mitchells have snatched ’em do you?’ Jed asked, still holding his private parts.
‘No chance, with Frankie still inside. It’s more than they dare do,’ Jimmy replied confidently.
‘What’s going on?’ Sally asked, as she appeared at the top of the stairs.
Jed ignored her and pushed his parents out of the front door. He felt tearful now and sick with fear. He’d already lost one child and losing his other two didn’t bear thinking about.
Stanley sat open-mouthed as Thelma and Louise prepared to drive off the cliff. It wasn’t the film that was causing his state of shock, it was because Pat the Pigeon had just laid her head on his shoulder and put an arm across his belly.
Even as a lad, Stanley had been no lothario. Women had never liked him, full stop, and apart from the rare fumble with Joycie, he’d had fewer sexual encounters than a monk.
Willing Thelma and Louise to get on with it and drive off the bastard cliff, Stanley was relieved when they did so and as the credits rolled, he immediately faked a yawn and stood up. ‘Oh well, that’s me done for the night. Them bitters have knocked me out.’
‘What about your rhubarb crumble?’ Pat asked, sitting up straight.
‘I’m still bloated from that stew, love. Is it OK if we eat it tomorrow?’
Pat the Pigeon was a five-foot-two, voluptuous and big-breasted blonde. She was in her mid-fifties, but still had a lovely complexion and an extremely pretty face. With her hearty laugh and sexy smile, men had always fallen at her feet and even when she’d been married to Vic, she’d had to fight off unwelcome advances from her army of admirers. Stanley was a different kettle of fish and as desperate as Pat was to get him into bed, she knew she had to play the waiting game.
‘Slowly, slowly catchee monkey,’ her wise old mum used to say.
‘Yes, of course it’s OK to eat it tomorrow, Stanley. You get off to that nice comfortable bed in the spare room and I’ll see you in the morning, lovey.’
Desperate for his nan not to go off her head or get drunk and smash the house up like she did the last time when his grandad left home, Joey had offered to stay the night with her. Dominic, being the best partner a man could wish for, had just arrived with a big bag of fish and chips for them all.
Pleased that his nan was tucking in, Joey offered her another pickled onion.
‘I bet that’s the old bastard. He’s probably too frightened to use his key,’ Joyce said as the doorbell rang.
Positive it couldn’t be his grandad, as they hadn’t heard his car pull up, Joey put his plate down and stood up. He opened the door and could barely believe his eyes. Georgie was standing on a plant pot, which she’d used to reach the doorbell, and Harry was standing next to the pot, shivering and crying.
‘Oh my God. Get inside, you’re both freezing,’ Joey urged his niece and nephew.
When the children walked into the room, Joyce dropped her dinner on the floor in shock and burst into tears. ‘Oh, my little darlings,’ she said, as she knelt down and hugged them both.
Dominic looked at Joey in astonishment. ‘How did they get here? Did Jed drop them off?’
Joey knelt down, it had been raining for the past half an hour, so he took the children’s coats off and ordered them to sit next to the fire. Harry was still sobbing and, overcome by emotion, he clung to his Nanny Joyce. Her cuddles reminded him of his mummy.
Joey knelt down and held Georgie in his arms. ‘Who brought you here?’ he asked her.
‘No one. We ran away.’
As Georgie then burst into tears as well, Joey turned to Dominic. ‘What are we gonna do?’
Dominic knelt down next to Joey. ‘This is important, Georgie. Why did you run away? You must tell us what happened.’
‘Because we wanted to see our mummy,’ Georgie cried.
Joyce was the next to break down in tears. ‘How did you find Nanny’s house?’ she wept.
‘’Cause I saw it when I was in Grandad Jimmy’s truck.’
‘Where is Mummy? Don’t wanna live with Daddy no more,’ Harry exclaimed, hiccupping.
Joyce held both children tightly to her chest. They were frozen stiff, the poor little mites. ‘Shall Nanny make you something nice and hot to eat and drink? It will warm your cockles, I promise.’
Georgie and Harry both nodded. They had chucked the rest of their sandwiches away and, after their marathon walk, were now both starving.
Joyce walked out into the kitchen and urged Joey to follow her. ‘What are we gonna do? We can’t keep them ’ere, we’ll get ourselves arrested. Should we ring the police?’
Joey thought momentarily, then shook his head. ‘Not yet. I’m gonna ring Dad, he’ll sort it out.’
Hearing Georgie and Harry chatting in the other room to Dominic, Joyce placed the sausages in the frying pan. She had missed her great-grandchildren so much and perhaps now they had run to her in their hour of need, something good might come out of this. Perhaps the authorities might let her have some kind of access to them.
Joyce made two mugs of hot chocolate and added some cold water so the poor little ha’porths didn’t burn themselves. ‘There you go, me little angels,’ she said, handing the mugs to them.
‘Can we see Mummy soon?’ Harry asked innocently.
‘Mummy isn’t here, love. But she told me to tell you that she can still see you from where she is and she loves you both very much.’
‘Daddy says Mummy is in prison and Nanny Alice says she is an evil old shitcunt,’ Georgie said, not quite understanding the meaning of her words.
‘If anyone is evil, it’s your Nanny Alice, not your mother,’ Joyce said standing up. She could smell the sausages burning.
Joey ended his phone call and walked into the kitchen. ‘Me dad said don’t do nothing till he gets there. He’s on his way.’
Eddie Mitchell rang his trusted solicitor Larry, then hit a ton as he zoomed along the A13. Gina announcing she was pregnant had been a big enough bolt out of the blue, but finding out that his grandkids had run away and turned up at Joycie’s had literally knocked him for six. What was God trying to do? Give him a fucking heart attack?
Hearing his dad pull up outside, Joey opened the front door and ran outside to greet him.
‘How are they? Are they OK?’ Eddie asked, concerned.
Joey nodded. ‘Nan’s just made ’em sausage sandwiches and given ’em a hot bath. They was in a right state when they arrived though, Dad. Their clothes were soaked and they were frozen stiff. They could have been snatched by some pervert or anything.’
Eddie nodded, then put an arm around Joey’s shoulder. ‘Have they said why they ran away?’
‘Yeah, they wanted to see Frankie. They said they missed their mum.’
As tough a man as he was, Eddie felt his eyes well up as he walked into the lounge. Georgie and Harry were sitting either side of Joycie. They both had big white bath towels wrapped around them and were munching on a bowl of crisps that was positioned on Joycie’s lap.
‘Look, Grandad Eddie’s here. Go and give him a cuddle,’ Joyce urged them.
Harry loved a cuddle, so he immediately stood up, and held his arms wide open. He didn’t care that his towel dropped to the floor.
Eddie