He was right. For too many years she’d kept Ava from Grey. The least she could do was stand with him while their mutual friends got married, a happy ending she couldn’t picture for herself. Other than that she didn’t know how to atone for what she’d done. To Ava, too.
Clearly, she’d made mistakes. Had it been easier to go about her life with Ava in Kansas City and Shawnee Mission rather than face Grey? If she’d never come back to Barren, would she ever have told him? She’d always planned to—at some point—but the opportunity never seemed to arise, and she’d tried to tell herself maybe that was for the best, that Grey had his own life without her. Now she knew that had been another error on her part. What if he’d simply run into Ava somewhere? She couldn’t risk that.
Today, as the next step before he met her, she was going to see Ava. She wouldn’t mention Grey just yet, although Ava had asked about her father over the years. Shadow had always kept it vague, telling Ava he couldn’t be part of their lives but that, of course, he loved her. Another reason to feel guilty now.
But first, after dealing with the morning emails and texts at the office, she had an appointment at the rehabilitation center to finally check on Ned Sutherland, the elderly rancher who had suffered a stroke. Shadow had provided a caregiver for him before that and he would probably need one again.
“You’re doing well, Mr. Sutherland. When do you expect to go home?”
For a moment, he didn’t answer. Their visit had been punctuated by long silences and the obvious frustration she saw in his weathered face. His speech halting, Ned covered his first stumbling attempt to speak with a discreet cough.
“I...go...prob’ly next...week.” His mouth leaned a little to the right and he gripped his weak hand in his lap with the other. The staff here had done their work, though. They’d gotten him on his feet and walking again, although he seemed to prefer staying in his room. That wasn’t good. He needed cheering up.
Shadow had found him sitting by the window, his bony shoulders slumped, looking out toward the babbling brook on the lush green property. Several rough wooden benches were arranged along the bank for patients to enjoy the view and listen to the rushing water. For a man who’d spent most of his life outdoors on a horse or a tractor, like Logan’s grandfather Sam—like Grey—Ned’s enforced confinement had likely been more than difficult.
“You’ll be back in the saddle before you know it,” Shadow said, leaning down to pat his joined hands. He had bowed his head over them, the circle of bare scalp at his crown, which was normally covered by his hat, appearing larger than before. In the past months, the rest of his hair had gone from gray to snowy white. She bent her knees to peer into his weary dark eyes. “I’m sorry I missed seeing your granddaughter today, but please tell her I said hi.”
“I...will.” He blinked up at her. “Nice place...but I’m pretty homesick.”
“I don’t blame you.” When she straightened, Shadow glanced down and saw the well-broken-in boots on his feet. Those he hadn’t left behind. Putting the bouquet of yellow freesias she’d brought for him in a pretty blue vase on his nightstand, she said, “Enjoy those magazines. Keep your chin up, Mr. Sutherland. I’ll check on you again the next time I’m here.”
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