‘Your brother Jon is coming home for a few days next week,’ my mother said as she took a pie from the oven. ‘You will wait to see him before you go, won’t you, Amy?’
‘Yes, of course, Mum. I’m going out after supper. Matt is back from his trip and he’s taking me to the pictures this evening, so I’ll have to hurry and get changed …’
I emerged breathlessly from Matthew’s crushing embrace.
‘If that’s what being away for two weeks does to you …’ I murmured and laughed up at him. ‘I like it. I like it a lot.’
‘I missed you so much!’ He touched my cheek with his fingertips, looking serious and a little apprehensive. ‘And I’ve got something to tell you, Amy.’
‘Something I shan’t like? I can see it in your face. Is it another long trip?’
‘It’s worse,’ Matthew said. ‘The firm wants me to go up to Manchester for six months. They are setting up a distribution centre for the north and they want me to run it for the first few months.’
‘But you can’t!’ I stared at him in dismay. ‘I should never see you.’
‘I’ll come back as often as I can at weekends. Perhaps once a fortnight if I can manage it.’
‘Once a fortnight!’ I couldn’t believe what he was telling me. ‘It was bad enough when you had the long trips, but this is impossible, Matt. Please tell them you can’t do it.’
‘This is very important to me, Amy. It is a step up the ladder to promotion. They’ve promised me another ten pounds a month, and perhaps more if I show them I can do it.’
He was prepared to desert me for ten pounds a month! I felt terribly hurt, even though I knew it was a lot of money to Matthew. But my father could give him the sixty pounds he would gain and never miss it.
‘Daddy will lend you the money for a house,’ I said sulkily. ‘He will give us a good wedding present and you could open your own shop. You wouldn’t have to go away and leave me all the time.’
‘That isn’t the way I do things, Amy.’ His mouth had pulled into a grim line and I knew he was angry. ‘I’ve told you before, I want to stand on my own feet. Ten pounds a month may not sound a lot to you, but the extra will make a difference when it’s added to what I’ve already saved.’
‘But I don’t want you to go!’ I drew back, looking at him unhappily. ‘If you loved me you wouldn’t leave me, Matt.’
‘Whether you believe it or not, I do love you, Amy. But I have to do this for us.’
My eyes filled with tears I was too proud to shed. He was cruel to hurt me like this and I wanted to hurt him back.
‘If you go there might not be any more us.’
The moment I had said it, I wished the words unspoken. Matthew’s eyes were icy cold, his expression disapproving.
‘If I thought you meant that I would take you home right now, Amy Robinson, but I know you don’t. You’re hurt and angry, and you’ve been spoiled. I’m afraid it isn’t always possible to get what you want in life, and you are just going to have to take no for an answer for once.’
His words struck deep. How could he say such a thing to me? I wasn’t spoiled, just indulged by loving parents.
‘Sometimes I don’t like you very much.’
‘Believe me, there are times when I don’t like you, Amy.’
‘Take me home! You don’t care about me a bit.’
‘Don’t be a fool!’ Matthew reached out for me, pulling me roughly into his arms. For a moment I fought him, but then I gave a sob of despair. ‘It’s only six months, my darling. I’ll telephone you at Lainie’s and I’ll come and visit as often as I can.’
‘You promise?’
He nodded, and then he was kissing me, his mouth taking hungry possession of mine, his tongue flicking inside my mouth as I opened to him. I clung to him desperately, feeling that I never wanted him to let me go. I was heedless, ready to do whatever he asked, needing this moment to last forever.
‘Oh, Amy,’ he croaked as he let me go. ‘Perhaps it’s as well that I’m going away. I’m not sure how much longer I can hold out. I want you so much …’
‘I want you, Matt. Make love to me … Everything.’
He shook his head and looked rueful. ‘That isn’t going to work, Amy. I’m not irresponsible and I don’t want to run any risks now. It would be awful for you if you fell for a baby and I was away. You would feel guilty and upset and I wouldn’t be here to comfort you. No, my darling, much as you tempt me, I’m going to wait.’
I knew there was no persuading him. Matthew had a will of iron. Besides, he was right. If we went all the way now I might fall for a baby before we could get married and my father would be disappointed in me. He trusted me and loved me. I didn’t want to see hurt or shame in his eyes.
‘Perhaps it is best if you go for a while,’ I said huskily. ‘But it’s going to seem such a long time …’
‘I’ve changed the single wardrobe in your room for a double one,’ Lainie said as she helped me carry my cases up the back stairs. ‘You’ll need more space now that you’ve come for a longer stay.’
The new wardrobe wasn’t the only change she’d made. As we went into the bedroom I saw that she had hung pretty cream lace curtains at the windows and the bed was covered in a quilt edged with the same lace. Lainie had cleaned the dark walnut furniture with lavender-scented polish, and there were lace mats under the rose-patterned china pots on the dressing table. A vase of roses had been placed on a table by the window.
‘It looks lovely,’ I told her. ‘You’ve been to so much trouble for my sake.’
‘It wasn’t any trouble,’ she assured me. ‘I’m pleased you’ve come, Amy. One of my best girls is leaving to get married soon and I need someone I can trust.’
‘I don’t know much about the business, Aunt Lainie.’
‘You will soon learn. Just watch the other girls for a start. I’ll show you how to pack a gown myself – there’s an art to getting it right so that it doesn’t crease during delivery – and the till is simple to work. If a customer wants to pay by account come and ask me first. Quite a few of my better-class ladies ask for the account to be sent to their husband, but there are one or two with outstanding accounts to be settled. In that case I shall deal with it myself.’
‘That must be a little embarrassing for you – if you have to say no.’
‘Not at all. It just means that I promise to deliver as soon as a payment is made. I keep the gown for a week and then it goes back on sale if the account isn’t paid. Business is business, Amy. If you let people get away with things they walk right over you.’
It was when she spoke in that tone of voice that people thought she was hard. Lainie could be tough when she needed to, and I suspected that life had taught her to look out for herself. I was certain now that something unpleasant had happened to her when she was younger, and that it had been something to do with the mysterious man my mother seemed to fear.
‘So will you be able to settle here?’ Lainie was looking at me anxiously.
‘Yes, of course, it’s lovely.’ I smiled at her. ‘I’m looking forward to starting work.’
‘Well, that won’t be until tomorrow. We’ve got the afternoon to ourselves, Amy, which is why I suggested