One young corporal introduced himself to me as Terry Cooke.
‘I haven’t seen you here before. Are you at the hospital?’
‘Yes, a very new recruit,’ I replied, responding instinctively to the admiring gleam in his eyes. ‘This is my first time at the dance.’
‘I’ve been several times. I’ve been stuck here for ages. I was out at the beginning but they shipped me back with a leg wound and I spend most of my time behind a desk now.’
‘Oh, poor you,’ I sympathized. ‘Have you asked for active service?’
‘Yes, but they say I’m useful where I am.’
I danced several times with Terry but he wasn’t my only partner. Eleanor’s dress seemed to have worked a little magic and I didn’t have to sit out one dance.
‘This is fun, isn’t it?’ Ally said, her cheeks pink with a flush of excitement. ‘I’m enjoying myself.’
She hadn’t sat down all the evening either, and I noticed she also danced with Terry Cooke several times.
It was such fun that I didn’t notice Tom O’Rourke arrive. I didn’t even know he was there until I heard his voice speaking my name.
‘You look wonderful this evening, Kathy.’ I turned to face him, my heart racing. He was so attractive and he made me feel so odd – alive and excited. His eyes went over me with obvious approval. ‘That dress really suits you – makes you look grown up.’
My pleasure faded as swiftly as it had flared. How dare he be so patronizing? If the dress was all that he found attractive then it wasn’t me he was complimenting.
‘Eleanor Ross lent it to me for the evening. I could never afford anything like this. I’m just Kathy Cole from the lanes – the scruffy kid your sister took pity on sometimes. If I look different tonight it’s just an illusion.’
The tone of my voice was harsh and he looked startled, as if wondering what he’d done to annoy me. I was about to apologize, then something made me draw back.
‘Excuse me. I promised this dance to someone.’
My head held high, I walked away from him. I wasn’t sure why I felt so angry with him but his attitude had touched a raw spot. I didn’t want to be treated as if I were still that kid from the lanes. I was training to be a nurse and people had to accept me for what I was now. No one else thought of me as a child – so why should Tom O’Rourke?
For the rest of the evening I studiously avoided looking in his direction. It was easy enough to ignore him because I never lacked for a partner and I was having a lovely time. I didn’t even mind when Ally told me about the gorgeous girl he’d brought to the dance.
‘She was really lovely. Not from the hospital, though. I’ve never seen her before anyway.’
No – nor have I,’ I admitted, acknowledging that I had noticed them dancing despite my efforts not to.
‘She’s not from your way then?’
‘No. At least I don’t know her.’
She looked much too sophisticated and well dressed to be from our way, and was obviously far more Tom O’Rourke’s type than I could ever be.
It shouldn’t have bothered me one way or the other, but as I lay in bed that night I couldn’t help wondering about the very attractive young woman Dr O’Rourke had brought with him. With someone like that as a partner it was hardly likely that he would be impressed by me, even in my borrowed dress.
Over the next days and weeks I struggled to dismiss Tom O’Rourke from my mind. It had been foolish of me to feel humiliated by a remark that was probably meant well, and there had never been a chance for me anyway. Gossip was rife in the hospital and most people said the romance between Dr O’Rourke and Barbara Retford was serious.
‘Eleanor was disappointed,’ Ally told me over supper one evening. ‘Apparently she fancied him herself.’
‘Well, she stood more of a chance than I did,’ I said. ‘He liked her taste in clothes better than mine.’
‘Apparently Babs Retford is the daughter of a consultant he trained under. They’ve known each other for ages. The word is that they plan to get married in the summer.’
Ally was a mine of information. She went out most evenings when she wasn’t on duty and seemed to have settled for friendship rather than romance. Mike’s letters had begun to arrive regularly now and she had stopped worrying over him – at least she didn’t say much these days.
Billy Ryan’s mother forwarded a postcard to me from him. I’d sent him a couple of long, newsy letters but his card didn’t mention them, merely saying he was all right and hoped I was. Gran had replied to my letter to her but hadn’t written again, but then, I knew she wasn’t good at things like that. She would probably need a little help to read the letters I sent her, and I thought she might take them to Bridget O’Rourke – which was why I always told her about all the fun I was having. Not that Bridget would tell her brother, of course.
It was silly of me to feel jealous of his lovely girlfriend, but I couldn’t help it and I was relieved when he didn’t bring her to the dance in the village a month later. He didn’t come at all, and I heard that he had been transferred to another hospital; there was a rumour that he might have gone to France, but no one seemed to know for sure. He certainly hadn’t bothered to say goodbye to me – but then, why should he? I hadn’t exactly encouraged a friendship between us.
So that was the end of any hopes I might have had concerning the good-looking Dr O’Rourke. After a few weeks I discovered that I could laugh at myself. It was silly of me to have fancied him in the first place. The best thing I could do was to put him out of my mind and get on with the job I was paid for!
I had my choice of young men willing to take me out if I wanted, though more often than not I chose to stay in and read a book or talk to my friends. Quite often I lingered in the canteen in the evenings, where Eleanor Ross joined me. I had come to like her a lot, and to discover that she wasn’t at all the spoiled darling of a rich father Ally thought her.
Ally still didn’t like her, and I noticed that sparks flew each time they met. They didn’t actually have a flaming row, but Ally was always picking at her, seeming as if she couldn’t leave her alone.
Eleanor and I sat cross-legged on my bed, sharing a bottle of wine, one evening. Ally was on the night shift, and Sally had gone out for the evening. We had both agreed that we were too tired to go anywhere, and Eleanor had suggested she bring a bottle of wine up so that we could spend some time together.
‘This was a good idea of yours,’ I said. ‘And this wine is delicious, better than anything I’ve had before.’
Eleanor smiled. ‘I thought you would like it – it’s a good medium French white, not too sweet and not too dry.’
‘Well, I definitely approve.’ I held my glass out for more. ‘It’s always port and lemon for the ladies where I come from, but from now on I’m a wine drinker.’
‘And just the weeniest bit tipsy,’ Eleanor said gurgling with affectionate laughter. ‘Oh, it is good to unwind sometimes, isn’t it, Kathy?’
‘Yes. I’m enjoying myself.’
‘Do you ever think what you’ll do when this dreadful war is over?’
‘I’m not sure. I might get married – or I might stay on in nursing. What are you going to do, Eleanor?’
‘I don’t think I want to marry, not for years and years anyway. I’ve never met a man I wanted to go to bed with for the rest of my life – although I’ve seen a few I wouldn’t mind