‘Rafael?’ she said. ‘May I ask you a question?’
‘Of course.’ He needed a suit for the day, dozens of which had miraculously appeared in the walk-in closet. He chose a grey one.
‘Where are we going with this?’
‘With what?’
‘This relationship. Yours and mine.’
His hand stilled. He forced himself to breathe. ‘I don’t know.’
‘We could discuss it?’ she offered tentatively. ‘Where we might go from here?’
‘What’s to discuss?’ said Rafe as panic speared through him along with bone-jarring fear at the thought of having to watch her walk away from him yet again. Not yet. Not now. His need over hers and even as he thought it, even as he acknowledged his weakness and the depth of his need for this woman, he knew that he could not hold Simone here much longer if she truly wanted to leave. ‘Do you want to leave me?’
‘No.’ She was by his side, taking his arm and turning him towards her. ‘Rafael, no! I just want to know what your feelings are for this place and this lifestyle and for me. You never say,’ she said in a small voice. ‘You never say what you want.’
‘I want to do right by you.’ With all that he was. ‘And the baby. I want you to be happy.’ He gathered up his courage and bared his soul. ‘With me.’
Simone’s eyes filled with tears and she whirled away as quickly as she’d arrived. ‘I hate her,’ she said fiercely.
‘Hate who?’
‘Your mother.’
‘I’m not overly fond of her myself,’ murmured Rafael. He didn’t quite see the connection between his statement of wants and Simone’s statement of hate. ‘So what?’
‘So I need to think that one day you might trust me again. To stand by you. Not to hurt you. And I don’t know if you ever will, because of your mother and the things she’s done.’ Simone crossed her arms around her body and hugged tight. ‘And because of me and the things I’ve done and the situation we’re in. And I need you to trust me, Rafael. This relationship won’t work properly until you do.’
‘Simone…’ He didn’t know what to say. ‘I’m trying.’
She bowed her head. He couldn’t see her tears, but her voice was thick with them. ‘I know.’
Simone didn’t see much of Rafael in the days that followed. For him it was meeting upon meeting, each one more important than the last. Each night saw him weary. Not weary of lovemaking, but weary of spirit and wary of everyone. Including her.
How much longer could he go on without letting anyone in?
She’d suggested they ask Harrison to visit Maracey and stay with them a while. She’d suggested they ask Luc and Gabrielle to visit them as well. Rafael needed people around him who he could trust and if not her then someone else. Negotiations on exactly what Rafael’s role here in Maracey would involve were coming to a close. The stakes were high. The power Rafe wielded was already considerable.
Whether he wanted to wield it was anyone’s guess.
Simone had taken to spending some of each lonely day in the old vineyard with Ruby the inquisitive puppy, a gardener’s wheelbarrow, secateurs and gloves. The gardens immediately surrounding the fortress were fully formed and immaculately maintained, but here amongst the vines there was work still to be done and vision to be applied. Some of that vision, Simone had decided, would be hers.
The row of vines she worked her way along today had come from Caverness some thirty years ago. Her father had sent them and Etienne had planted them. Simone smirked as she straightened from her pruning and glanced down the row. Not that he’d planted them straight.
Still, they were a connection with her home, and one that she would see revived. She missed Caverness, there was no denying it. She missed the duties she’d borne within the Duvalier champagne empire and the people she’d worked with. She missed Lucien and Gabrielle and her favourite café. She missed being able to move freely through the outside world. To go where she pleased, whenever she pleased, and by whatever method of transport she pleased.
If Maracey had an outside world, she hadn’t found it yet.
If there was freedom to be had here, she hadn’t found that either. The high, cloister-like hedging around the terraced vines mirrored her sense of imprisonment but at least there was sky up above and a view down the valley that could make a spirit soar.
Rafael didn’t even get that much, these days.
Simone pruned a wayward offshoot and tossed it towards the wheelbarrow. Much to Ruby’s delight, it missed. Simone was trying to teach Ruby to retrieve the ill-aimed vines and drop them into the wheelbarrow, but Ruby had proven remarkably resistant to the idea. All retrieved vines, sticks and other assorted garden oddments would be dropped at Simone’s feet in the hope that they would be thrown again and that was all there was to it.
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