‘Have you no thought for our reputations?’ Dove gathered her thoughts long enough to answer his question. ‘We are in a public place where anyone could come strolling through and my maid is just in the other room. She could have walked in at any time! Do you know what could have happened if we’d been caught?’ That lesson had been drummed into her quite thoroughly: kisses of any nature were compromising. They led straight to the altar, the very thing the Prince seemed intent on counselling her against. ‘Perhaps the better question is not what was I thinking, but what were you thinking?’
The Prince’s blue eyes were hot flames fixed on her, his voice low. He might have been stunned for a moment by her act, but he was not angry. He was...amused? But his words were serious. ‘I thought you should know what you’re sacrificing, what your parents and society are asking you to give up in order to make their alliance.’
Something inside Dove shrivelled and she realised she’d been hoping for a different answer, something along the lines that she’d been irresistible, or that he’d been overcome. The Prince gave a wry smile. ‘You are disappointed. Still clinging to the fairy tale, are we?’
Dove flushed. Perhaps she was. Perhaps it took more than two hours to kill a dream after all. ‘Prince Kutejnikov, I think we should return home.’ There was no reparation that could call back the peace of the day now.
‘I think after this afternoon you should call me Illarion.’ He offered her his arm, negotiating again: the use of his name in exchange for escorting her home. ‘And I shall call you Dove.’
‘First names are shockingly informal. It is impossible. It cannot be done.’ If she allowed such a liberty, she’d be admitting to their intimacy. Admittance meant acceptance. Acknowledgement. At the moment, she would rather not acknowledge what had passed between them, the press of his mouth on hers, the way her body had responded. She’d been all too aware of the need to lean into him, the shocking thrill to feel the hard, muscled planes of a man’s body up close for the first time. Even through layers of clothes, there’d been an intoxicating intimacy in that physical connection. Her reaction had surprised her, confused her.
Illarion gave a wicked chuckle. He was laughing at her again. This time at her expense. He thought her a prude. ‘We’ll use those names only in private then.’ He winked, assuming her consent.
They stepped out into the lingering sunshine. Late afternoon shadows had begun to fall, hinting at the onset of a spring evening. Illarion leaned close to her ear as they walked. ‘A piece of advice for you, my dear. I don’t let the title wear me.’ He fell silent, letting her absorb the words as they walked to the curricle. He handed her up as if there’d been no break in the conversation. ‘Of course, it’s dangerous. They want you to wear the title. It’s easier for them if you’re not a person. It’s easier for you, too; you forget to think about what you want, until you realise it’s too late.’
He moved around the horses’ heads and sprang up to his seat, his body taking up space beside her. His thigh rested against hers unapologetically as he gathered the reins, making her even more aware of him now than she had been on the drive out.
He clucked to the horses. ‘Is it me or my ideas that make you uncomfortable?’ He slid her a sideways glance. ‘Perhaps it is my kisses? You may have stopped the kiss, but that doesn’t mean you didn’t like it.’
She was seized with the urge to put her hands over her ears, to shout at him to stop! It was too much to take in for one day, his radical ideas, his kisses. Her mind was swimming in the newness of her thoughts and the confusion they brought, panicking even. Like a drowning victim who would drown her rescuer along with her in her confusion, she lashed out. ‘I’m beginning to think you didn’t leave Kuban. They most likely kicked you out if this is how you behave.’ She’d meant the words to be scolding, the kind of set down a lady might offer a forward gentleman who’d crossed the line of politeness. She had not expected her words to hit a target.
The line of Illarion’s jaw went hard, the features of his face going tight, his words terse. ‘You know nothing about me.’ He didn’t like the quizzing glass turned his way, although he hadn’t minded probing her psyche.
‘And you know nothing about me.’ Dove straightened her shoulders and fixed her gaze on the road. Another lesson learned today: this was what happened when one confided in someone one didn’t know well. ‘I was wrong to have burdened you with my confidences. I was unforgivably impetuous. I would appreciate it if you would forget my disclosures.’
A proper gentlemen would accept her apology and would understand what it meant: that they should limit their association. She was counting on Illarion to know that and to act accordingly. But he did not. ‘What about the kiss? Should I forget about that, too?’ His tone was hard with cynicism as if he knew she could not forget that as easily. Indeed, she suspected she might think about that kiss far longer than was prudent.
The town house came into sight and she was saved from answering as Illarion pulled the carriage to the kerb. The street was quiet and for a moment they were nearly alone except for the servants sitting on the back. She slid him a questioning look when he didn’t immediately come around. ‘Give me your hand, Lady Dove.’ The hardness had left his face and he was charming once more, his voice low. ‘I want to give you a talisman. If you would forget the first kiss, perhaps you would do better to remember the second.’ He took her hand and raised it to his lips, pressing a kiss to her open palm. It was nothing like the first kiss, but gentle as the gesture was, she could feel the fire start to burn once more. Would it be like this now every time he touched her? The question was wickedness itself in the assumption that there would be a next time. She was allowing herself to be tempted.
A footman spotted them and came down the stairs to assist her. Illarion—Prince Kutejnikov, she strongly reminded herself—released her hand. ‘Good day, Lady Dove.’
‘Good day, your Highness.’ She could not take even the tiniest step down the road of familiarity. Dove stepped down from the curricle with a strict politeness she hoped made it clear that there would be no first names, no private permissions. She promised herself she would not be like the other ladies who followed him around ballrooms and patiently waited while he danced with others. She couldn’t be like them. It simply wasn’t permissible. She was the Duke of Redruth’s daughter and she was held to higher standards. Always and in all things.
He inclined his blond head, the fragments of a smile on his lips as if he knew a secret. ‘Thank you for an interesting afternoon, Lady Dove.’ It was done so well, Dove imagined she was the only one who noted the mocking tone beneath his propriety. Halfway up the steps, he called to her, ‘Lady Dove, was your deal with the devil worth it?’
She glanced over her shoulder. She linked her gaze with his and let a coy smile take her mouth. ‘Was yours?’
* * *
It was damn well worth it and he had the pages to show for it. Illarion sat in paradise, otherwise known as the back veranda of Kuban House, a glass of Stepan’s homemade samogan to hand should he need it and papers spread before him. His thick mass of hair was piled into a bun atop his head, not unlike an eastern warrior’s, a testament to how seriously he was working. He preferred his hair out of his face when he wrote. He’d discarded his coats, too, the moment he’d arrived home. The fewer distractions the better. He liked his body as free as his mind. He’d write naked out here if he could, but Stepan would kill him if he came home and found him nude in the garden. He’d tried it once, so he knew. Now he reserved that particular artistic luxury for the privacy of his chambers. Right now, shirtsleeves and trousers would have to do. He wanted to be outdoors, wanted to capture what it had felt like at the park; the feel of spring,