‘I guess I can understand that,’ Noah said, but his tone said he couldn’t.
She sighed. ‘Also...university wasn’t the fresh new life I was hoping for. Turns out I was the same naive and gullible Eloise there too.’
She’d thrown herself into her business studies and, in her final year, a relationship with another student. Everything seemed perfect—they’d talked about setting up an events business together, about heading out into the real world and making it big. Everything she’d dreamed of seemed close to coming true—running her own business, living her own life, making a success of things at last. Until he’d run off with her best ideas and the only friend she’d made at university, leaving all her classmates talking about it.
Really, was it any wonder she avoided love these days?
‘Do you want to tell me?’ Noah asked, and Eloise shook her head.
‘Let’s just say, at least the guy who screwed me over personally and professionally at uni wasn’t an actor.’
Noah didn’t press for the whole sordid story, which she appreciated. She’d shared enough of her past disasters for one night.
Instead, he kissed her shoulder and asked, ‘Where are your parents now?’
‘My dad died while I was at university. My mum...she’s still in town. Her memory is going, though. Early onset dementia, the doctors said. She can’t even remember everything she did back then. These days she’s just a harmless old lady, I suppose. And the town... Well, they haven’t forgotten, I don’t suppose. But there are newer and better scandals to talk about most of the time.’
‘Until Melissa came back and brought it all up again.’
‘Yeah.’
Noah sighed. ‘Well, I guess that explains a lot about your attitude to actors.’
With a laugh, Eloise lay back, breaking the intense connection between them. She felt lighter, somehow, for telling him everything.
‘Of course, you’re still hugely biased against us.’ Noah followed her, his body pressing against hers as he kissed her again. ‘Not all actors are the same, you know.’
‘Maybe not,’ Eloise allowed. ‘But a lot of them are. Look at you—a different girl on your arm in every photo.’
‘That’s different.’
‘How?’
‘That’s...it’s not me,’ Noah said. ‘It’s the Noah Cross the press and the public want to see.’
‘So it’s all an act. But do the women you take out know that?’
‘Always.’ Noah’s eyes were serious above her. ‘I’m always upfront. It’s one night, or several, but it’s never serious. They know the deal. I never fall for them, never tell them I love them, never give them any expectations.’
‘So you try never to hurt anyone.’ But was he protecting them or himself? Eloise couldn’t be sure. ‘Isn’t that kind of lonely?’
‘Sometimes.’
‘So why do it?’
Noah didn’t answer. Instead, he rolled over to lie beside her again.
‘What about your family?’ Eloise asked instead. ‘You’ve heard all about mine. Tell me about yours. Are they proud of you?’
Noah barked out a harsh laugh. ‘Not exactly. My dad’s opinion of actors is about as good as yours. He thinks we’re all entitled, self-obsessed, narcissistic idiots. Not that he’d put it in those words.’
‘Why?’ Eloise asked. ‘I mean, why does he think that? And what about your mother?’
‘I grew up in standard middle America. My family were God-fearing, humble and happy to stay at exactly the same level they’d always been. Working a factory job, drinking beer on a Friday night and never looking for anything different.’
‘But you weren’t,’ Eloise guessed.
‘No. My best friend and I...we always talked about getting out of town, escaping to LA and seeking fame and fortune.’ Noah gave a half smile at the memory. ‘I always thought it was a bit of a pipe dream—until the day she said, “Let’s go”.’
‘And you went.’
‘Yeah. I did.’ He smiled at her. ‘And the rest is history.’ Leaning in, he pressed kisses over her shoulder, obviously hoping to distract her. But Eloise had more questions.
‘Why did you want to know about my mother?’ she asked. ‘And don’t say it’s because I’m different. Everybody is different. If you want to know me...I need to know. Why?’
Noah shifted beside her, lying flat on his back as he stared at the ceiling. Eloise turned onto her side and he wrapped an arm around her shoulders, pulling her close, almost absently, it seemed. Was he always like this with a woman after sex? He said the conversation was new, but what about the closeness? Eloise knew she’d never have the courage to ask.
‘I can’t completely explain it,’ Noah said eventually. ‘But I’ll try.’
‘Good enough.’ Resting her cheek against his chest, Eloise felt his heartbeat thrumming through her body, in time with her own, and listened.
‘When I first saw you...I wanted you, I’ll admit that. You’re gorgeous, Eloise, whether you know it or not. And there was something about you. I wanted to be close to you. I thought...’ He gave a little laugh, low and meek. ‘I thought you might be an easy conquest to make the wedding a little more fun.’
‘Which I was.’ Eloise shrank back at the realisation, but he held her close against him.
‘No. No, you were anything but.’
‘We’re naked in my bed, Noah. I think I’ve been conquered.’ And how easy she’d been for him to claim.
‘I think...I think you might have done the conquering,’ Noah said after a moment, and Eloise stilled in his arms. ‘My agent told me I had to behave this week, if I wanted this director to take me seriously for a big role. No flings. And I tried, I really did. I knew you weren’t like the other women I see. You didn’t know the rules yet. You saw...more of me. Deeper. And when I kissed you this afternoon...’
When he didn’t continue, Eloise said, ‘What? What happened then?’
Noah hauled her up his body so she was staring into his eyes, every inch of her pressed up against him.
‘When I kissed you, I knew none of it mattered. I couldn’t help myself. I knew I had to be with you.’
HE’D GONE TOO FAR. Noah knew that the moment the words left his mouth. And if he hadn’t known the shock in Eloise’s eyes would have told him.
‘For tonight, I mean,’ he said, backtracking fast. ‘I couldn’t leave Morwen Hall without one night with you.’
‘And now you’ve had it.’ Eloise pulled away, and he resisted the urge to tug her close again. He wasn’t staying—this wasn’t love, wasn’t for ever. They both knew that, whatever the crazy attraction between them would have them believe.
‘So, what’s next for you?’ Eloise asked, putting a few inches of blanket between them as she propped her head up on one hand to look at him. ‘After you leave Morwen Hall, I mean.’
What was next? He had no idea. He couldn’t think beyond this bed, beyond this moment. Beyond her.
‘What’s this film where the director needs you to be celibate?’ she went on, and Noah breathed a sigh of relief. That was safe. They could