Or he could lie about it.
Either way, he doubted Hallie would ever be satisfied.
Nate opted for the truth. “You were a kid, Hallie. You were too young for me. But I knew if we continued working together, we would end up in bed. That left me with two choices, and both of them sucked. I could be a jerk and sleep with you. Or I could be a jerk and have you transferred. I did what I thought was best for you under the circumstances. And that’s the honest truth.”
IT WAS THE LAST THING Hallie had expected Nate to say.
And the worst thing Nate could have admitted.
She couldn’t even take any satisfaction in his admission that he had been attracted to her—which came as a shock to Hallie. Maybe that satisfaction would come later. But at the moment, Hallie was pissed.
“And you couldn’t have told me I was too young for you? To back off? That it wasn’t going to happen between us?” Hallie demanded. “You really thought destroying my self-esteem and humiliating me in front of everyone at the station was the best thing you could do for me? Under the circumstances?”
“I guess this is the wrong time to point out that transferring you to the production department actually worked out pretty well for you.”
Hallie’s eyes narrowed. “Don’t you dare make light of what you did to me, Nate. I won’t stand for it. Everyone thought we slept together, even though we didn’t. And that left me looking like the stupid bimbo you tossed aside after you got what you wanted.”
His expression softened. “You’re right,” he said. “I shouldn’t have embarrassed you like that. And I should have apologized to you a long time ago.”
“Then why didn’t you?”
Nate kept staring at her.
Hallie stared back. In fact, it felt good staring openly at Nate like this, instead of one of them doing what they usually did and looking away if their eyes happened to meet.
Maybe too good.
“Let me ask you this,” Nate said. “What if I had apologized to you after I had you transferred? And what if I’d told you the truth that I thought you were too young for me? Would you have backed off and accepted the fact that it wasn’t going to happen between us?”
He caught Hallie off guard with those questions.
She thought of all the times she’d brought a date to Thanksgiving dinner, or to Christmas, or to any other function at Janet and David’s when she knew Nate was going to be there. It had been her way of thumbing her nose at Nate’s rejection, her proof that other men desired her whether Nate did or not.
Over the years, she’d dated more men, she’d broken up with more men and she’d turned down more men than she cared to remember. And the sad truth was, not one of them measured up to this man.
But did she have the guts to ’fess up and tell him the truth?
“Yes, I would have accepted your apology,” Hallie finally said. “But no, I wouldn’t have backed off. I was crazy about you. I would have pursued you to the depths of hell and back trying to prove you wrong.”
“And that’s why I had you transferred,” Nate said. “I knew I couldn’t survive another taxi ride.”
Hallie sighed and shook her head. “And all these years I thought the very sight of me disgusted you. That you were an insufferable egotistical bastard who didn’t think I was worthy of your time.”
“The very sight of me did disgust you,” he mentioned.
Hallie grimaced at the thought of how rude she’d been to Nate so many times. “I’m so sorry, Nate.”
“So am I,” he said. “For everything.”
It was his inflection on everything that got her.
The everything currently eating them both up inside.
Hallie stepped forward, and slid her arms around Nate’s waist, letting her head rest on his shoulder. She felt him stiffen for a second, but he put his arms around her, too.
There was nothing sexual about their embrace. Nothing sexual implied. Nothing sexual intended. Nothing sexual period. Their embrace was completely innocent, but it was long overdue.
They simply held each other.
No words were necessary.
No words were adequate for the loss they’d suffered.
But having Nate’s arms around her was the comfort Hallie had been waiting for since the two policemen arrived at her office to tell her about the accident. Comfort from the one person who loved Janet and David every bit as much as she did.
CHAPTER THREE
BY THE TIME she and Nate made it to Dr. Deborah Langston’s office, Hallie had stopped worrying about the psychologist picking up on any underlying tension between them. The heart-to-heart in the bathroom had altered the dynamics of their strained relationship.
But the emotional upheaval had been exhausting.
All Hallie wanted was to go back to Wedge Pond so she could retreat and not have to talk to anyone else for the remainder of the day. Then she’d have time to take stock. Ahn, Nate, and Roberta were the only family she had left. But there were no blood ties to keep them together. Janet and David had been their bond. Without that center pulling them all in, would they keep in touch? Given how Hallie had never really gotten along with Roberta, it was doubtful. And she’d truly be alone.
So if she didn’t want that, it was up to her to strengthen those relationships. How the hell she’d accomplish that baffled her at the moment. And the mere thought of no family to catch her when she fell nearly brought her to her knees.
Hallie took a deep breath when Nate opened the office door. First things first. Get through this interview, then she could figure out how to hold three fiercely independent souls together.
“I hope this won’t take long.” She looked around thinking the reception room was exactly what she expected—a kid-friendly section in one corner, reception-style chairs lining the walls. The pleasant surprise, however, was that no one else was waiting. That gave Hallie hope there would be no delays seeing Dr. Langston.
Nate followed as she walked toward the closed glass window where an older woman with frosted hair and dark-rimmed glasses was sitting talking on the phone. The woman ignored them completely until she finally ended the call. She slid the glass window open without saying a word, the bored expression on her face broadcasting how much she hated her job.
“Hallie Weston and Nate Brock to see Dr. Langston,” Hallie told her. “We have a ten-o’clock appointment.”
She picked up a clipboard and shoved it through the window at Hallie. “Take a seat and fill this out.”
Hallie refused to take it. “We’re only here to talk to Dr. Langston about one of her patients.”
“I still need your insurance information to bill for the consult fee.”
“I don’t intend to file the consult on my insurance,” Hallie told her. “I’ll pay cash for the consult fee.”
She gave Hallie a condescending look. “I still need your information in order to give you a receipt. Take a seat and fill out the form.”
Nate finally reached out and took the clipboard.
The woman slammed the window with a bang.
“I wasn’t trying to be difficult,” Hallie whispered as Nate led her to a group of chairs as far from the window as possible. “But there was no excuse for her being so rude.”
“Don’t worry about it,” he said as they both sat. “I can fill out