Gently, he took the stack of papers from Colleen. There were all kinds of notes. A description of Toby’s first smile, his first laugh, which was just last week. His feeding schedule. More.
“You’re right. I’m a wealthy man. I can hire a nurse.” Just the way his parents had. A whole series of nurses and nannies who had come and gone. He didn’t want that for his child.
“You could teach me what to do.” The words just popped right out of nowhere. Dillon had no clue why he’d even said the words, but…
“I could take care of him,” he added.
As if she wasn’t even thinking, Colleen suddenly reached across and touched his hand. “That’s incredibly sweet.”
Dillon wanted to laugh. Sort of. “Have you looked at me, Colleen? No one on earth, least of all the people in my business or the men under my command, have ever called me sweet.”
“I know.” She looked down at where her hand lay on his, as if she regretted the move but didn’t know how to take it back. “I didn’t mean it quite the way it sounded. What I meant was, you don’t have a clue what you’re saying. Despite all your accomplishments, taking care of a baby is different from anything on earth you’ve ever done.”
“I suspect that it is. So show me, Colleen.”
“Now?”
“I’ve been away from my business for a long time. There are people I trust in charge, and they won’t mind waiting for me a little longer. I have time for you to teach me.”
Colleen worked hard at controlling her breathing. Dillon Farraday’s hand was warm and strong and very masculine beneath her own. Not that she had any business noticing. Quickly, she pulled away. “I don’t feel comfortable having a man in my house.”
Strange man. She should have said strange man. But she had meant what she said. She didn’t want any man here. This whole house was her haven, her shelter, her barrier.
“You have other buildings. I could rent one.”
For the first time she allowed herself to smile. “Some of them have animals in them, some have tools. You aren’t exactly the type to bunk with the hired hands I employ.”
“Don’t judge a man by his looks, Colleen.”
No, she never did. Looks could deceive. “I won’t.”
“Good. Then you’ll let me stay here a few days? You’ll train me in the basics so I can be a good father to Toby?”
“What will you do when you go back to Chicago? You’ll still need someone.”
“What do you do when you have to work around the ranch?”
“I bundle him up and take him with me or I find people I trust implicitly to help.”
“Then I’ll do that. Colleen?”
She looked straight into those ice-blue eyes and her heart began to pound fast. He was the most gorgeous, intimidating man she’d ever met. Not in the usual sense of the word. It wasn’t that she thought he’d physically harm her, but something far different. He was the kind of man who could hurt her emotionally, and she was pretty sure that it wasn’t just because he would take Toby. The smartest thing to do would be to run, to say no, and yet…
“You’ll give me warning before you take him away?” she asked, trying to adjust to the sudden shift in plans.
She should be jumping at this, latching on to it. Dillon wanted to learn how to be a good father. That was a good thing, the best thing for Toby, and she would at least have a bit more time with the baby.
And with the man.
Colleen shoved that thought away. She hoped her face wasn’t flaming. In the past, her past, well, a woman like her could easily look pathetic when she was attracted to a man, especially a man who was totally out of bounds.
“Will you let me stay?” he repeated. “Will you tutor me until I’ve got everything down pat and until Toby and I feel comfortable together?”
“You know I can’t say no to that.”
He smiled at her, and heat rushed through her. “Then say yes, Colleen.”
She didn’t even remember saying the word. She felt faint and sick and nervous, as if her body was not her own. But she must have said yes, because Dillon had gone outside and he was pulling a suitcase from his car.
A man was going to be staying with her here at the Applegate Ranch. She wondered what he would say when he discovered that all her employees were women.
Chapter Two
MAYBE he should have stayed inside and read all that paperwork that Colleen had for him to pore over, but the enormity of what he was doing had finally hit, and Dillon needed a few minutes to regroup, so he stood on the porch leaning on the crooked railing as he looked out across the land. He’d spent a lifetime learning to control his emotions. Those lessons had served him well in business, and this past year with all that had happened, the merits of guarding his reactions had hit even harder.
But Colleen Applegate’s passionate loyalty to his son had been unexpected. It had caught him off guard, which was most likely why he had made that uncharacteristically impetuous declaration that he wanted her to give him parenting lessons. He was already regretting that decision and yet, she was right. He didn’t know a damn thing about caring for a baby and he wasn’t about to let just anyone take over that task.
He swore beneath his breath. “What a mess.”
The door opened behind him and when he turned to look at Colleen the expression on her face told him that she had, most likely, heard his last comment. Her chin was raised in defiance, and a trace of guilt slipped through Dillon. None of this, after all, was her fault.
“I apologize for the way that sounded.”
All the defiance slipped away from her. “I doubt this was what you had anticipated when you thought about having children.”
“I hadn’t actually thought about it too much.”
She studied him. “You didn’t want a child?”
It hadn’t been that so much. “I felt…unqualified. Still do. But he’s here, and just because I hadn’t anticipated him doesn’t mean I don’t want him. He’s never going to feel as if his birth was a mistake, so don’t even think that I’m heading down that path. I’m taking this job seriously.”
“Job?”
“Dad.”
Colleen gave a curt nod. “Okay, Dad. Let’s get you settled. Then we’ll get right to the father lessons.”
Dillon saw now that she had a bundle of quilts in her arms. He reached out and started to take them from her but she shook her head.
“I can carry a few blankets,” she said.
“I’m sure you can. You run a ranch. You tend to my son. You have employees. But just because you can doesn’t mean you should. I’m not a guest and I’m sure having me living here is an imposition that wasn’t remotely in your plans for this week. If you won’t let me compensate you for Toby’s care, at least let me pull my weight.” Take back some of the control you’ve lost these past months, he told himself. He’d grown up having no input into his parents’ decision to farm him out to disinterested keepers. As a child, his quest for affection had only resulted in a roller-coaster ride of brief bouts of interest followed by long periods of apathy from both his parents and the people they hired to keep him fed, occupied and out of their way.
So, when he’d grown up, he’d turned to something ever dependable: logic and control. The precise environment