It wasn’t logical and it certainly wasn’t smart, but there was just something about the man that stirred her blood. She didn’t know why she responded that way to Rowan and not any of his brothers, but she did. Despite her imaginative fantasies, she knew he would never see her as anything other than the children’s nanny and a poor choice of one, at that.
And she feared that the background that hadn’t caused Julian or Catherine to raise an eyebrow wouldn’t be so readily accepted by the prince regent—if he were made aware of it.
“You have a leaf in your hair.” His curt statement drew her attention back to the present.
“Oh.” She felt her cheeks flush as she reached up, found the offending piece of foliage and quickly crumpled it in her fist. “I came directly from the garden.”
“But not immediately.”
“No,” she acknowledged. “Princess Alexandria and Prince Damon were distressed, and I didn’t want to leave them in such a state.”
“When you are summoned to my office, your wants are irrelevant.”
She might have a crush on the prince, but she wasn’t oblivious to the fact that he could be a royal ass at times. It seemed that this was one of those times. As the flutters in her belly became knots of apprehension, she forced herself to take a deep breath and mentally count to ten before she responded. “I beg your pardon, Your Highness, but I was under the impression that it was my job to care for the children, and that is what I was doing.”
“And what were you doing when this picture was taken?” he demanded, tossing a newspaper down on the top of his desk.
Lara’s gaze dropped, her annoyance giving way to shocked embarrassment, then fury. “I was on private property,” she told him. “I don’t know how this could have been taken.”
“There’s no such thing as privacy beyond the gates of this estate,” he reminded her. “You should have learned that long before now.”
It would be smart, she knew, to keep her eyes down, fold her hands together and apologize for her obvious error in judgment. But she hadn’t done anything wrong, and her pride refused to let her beg for his forgiveness.
“Instead, you’re again on the front page, looking like you belong in a centerfold.”
Though her face was hot with a combination of embarrassment and anger, she managed to respond evenly. “I’m flattered you think so.”
His dark eyes narrowed on her. “If you think I’m amused by this, you’re sorely mistaken.”
“On the contrary, I wouldn’t think you’re amused by anything, Your Highness.”
“Certainly not, less than three weeks after the deaths of the Prince and Princess of Tesoro del Mar, a picture of their nanny—” he slapped his hand down on the paper “—cavorting on the beach.”
“Cavorting?” she challenged.
“Is there another explanation for this?”
A very innocent one, in fact, but he obviously wasn’t prepared to listen to anything she had to say. “Ask your brother,” she said instead. “He was there.”
She saw a quick flicker of surprise in his eyes before they narrowed again. “Marcus?”
“Yes.”
His jaw tightened. “It seems that at least two of my brothers have exhibited questionable judgment where you’re concerned, and though I didn’t agree with Julian’s decision to hire a nanny so young and obviously inexperienced, it was his decision to make. But the children are my responsibility now, and I have to do what’s best for them.”
Now she did drop her gaze, so he wouldn’t see the tears that filled her eyes. It was her own fault, she knew, for baiting him. But his self-righteousness grated on her and overrode her common sense. It was only thoughts of the children that enabled her to ignore both her anger and her pride. For them she would grovel, she would plead—she would do whatever was necessary.
“Whatever you think that picture means, it has nothing to do with my ability to care for the children.”
“On the contrary,” he said mockingly, “it has everything to do with knowing what is best for them and proves to me that your judgment is lacking.”
His tone was decisive, his expression stony, and she knew that groveling and pleading would have no effect on this man. Along with the realization came a stab of pain that struck deep into her heart.
“You can pick up your severance pay from the finance office on your way out,” he said.
The anger was stronger than the hurt now, and strong enough to override the reason that had held her temper in check. “Is that supposed to make everything okay? Do you really think monetary compensation would make me want to abandon the children?”
When he opened his mouth to speak, she shook her head. “Oh, that’s right—what I want is irrelevant.”
A muscle in his jaw tightened, but he only said, “That will be all, Miss Brennan.”
She made her way to the door, brokenhearted and defeated by the knowledge that there was nothing she could do now. On the other hand, she had nothing left to lose. She paused with her hand on the knob and turned back to him.
“No, that’s not all,” she said. “You say you’re doing this because it’s best for the children, but how could you possibly know? Do you think that spending a few hours at the dinner table with them on special occasions has made you an expert on what they want or need?”
He deliberately kept his attention focused on the papers on his desk, as if she was already gone. But Lara wouldn’t be dismissed so easily.
“Did you know that Christian struggles with algebra and hates scalloped potatoes? Did you know that Lexi’s favorite color is orange and that she dreams of being a dancer?”
He glanced up, his eyes hard and cold, but said nothing.
“Did you know that Damon hasn’t slept through the night since he heard about the explosion on the yacht?”
There, finally, just the slightest flicker of something, though she couldn’t have guessed whether it was surprise or distress or annoyance. And when he spoke, it was only to say, “Are you quite finished now?”
She shook her head. It was too late to hope that he would reconsider—the prince regent wouldn’t let his decisions be questioned, never mind changed—but, for the sake of the children, she needed him to understand. “They need more than a watchful eye and instruction on their royal responsibilities—they need to know that they’re loved.”
His jaw hardened. “You are dismissed, Miss Brennan.”
The tears that she’d tried so valiantly to hold back, tears of frustration and anger and hurt, spilled onto her cheeks, but she held her head high. “And you are an arrogant, pompous ass.”
Chapter Two
“You really called him that?” Tanis’s grin was as wide as her eyes.
“I really did.” Lara sniffled as she nodded.
She’d hardly stopped crying since she’d driven through the gates of the palace, away from the children she’d grown to love as if they were her own. The children to whom she hadn’t even said goodbye.
Prince Rowan hadn’t refused to let her see them, so she couldn’t blame him for that. No, that responsibility was entirely her own, because she’d known she would never be able to face them without falling apart and because she didn’t know how to explain to them that she was leaving—at