“What do you even know about being a parent?” she snapped. “When would you find the time? Have you even considered what you’re getting yourself into? Diaper changes and midnight feedings. Or will you hire someone to raise the baby for you? Leave all the dirty work to them?”
“You don’t know anything about me,” he said.
“Sad, considering you were married to my sister for seven years.”
He took a deep breath and blew it out. “I think we got off on the wrong foot here.”
Actually, what she had done was reverse the balance of power so that now she had the upper hand. It was the only way to deal with men like him. A trick Becca had obviously never learned.
“Trust me when I say, I have given this considerable thought, and I feel it’s something I need to do. And I assure you that both you and your parents will see the baby. My parents are both dead, so you’ll be the only other family the child has. I would never deny him that.”
“And I’m just supposed to believe you?”
“At this point, you really don’t have much choice. Because we both know that the chances of finding a lawyer who will represent you for free are slim to none. I’ve been in business a long time. I recognize a bluff when I see it.”
She bit her lip. So much for having the upper hand.
“I’m not doing this to hurt anyone, Katy. I just want a child.”
But why did it have to be Becca’s child? “We may not be as rich as you, but we can still fight it.”
“And you would lose.”
Yes, she would. But she could put up one hell of a fight. And put her parents through hell in the process. Not to mention decimate them all financially.
The sad fact was she had no choice but to accept this. She was going to have to take him on his word that they would see the baby. What other recourse did she have?
“Can I ask who the surrogate will be?”
He was gracious enough not to gloat at her obvious surrender. “I’m not sure yet. My attorney is looking at possible candidates.”
She frowned. “How will you know they’re trust worthy?”
“They’ll go through a rigorous interview process and background check. If they’ve ever been arrested, or used illegal substances, we’ll know about it.”
But there was no way to know everything. Katy watched the national news and knew situations like this had a way of going horribly awry. What if the woman smoked, or did drugs while she was pregnant? Or took some other physical risk that might harm the baby? Or what if she decided she didn’t want to give the baby up? Would it matter that it was Rebecca’s egg?
Or even worse, she could just disappear with Rebecca’s child, never to be seen again. For Katy’s parents—and probably Adam, too—it would be like losing Rebecca all over again.
“What if you think the woman is trustworthy, but you’re wrong?” she asked him, growing more uneasy by the second.
“We won’t be,” Adam assured her, but that wasn’t good enough.
She took a swallow of her coffee, burning her tongue. If she let him do this, she could look forward to nine months of being on edge, worrying about her niece or nephew’s safety.
There was only one person she trusted enough to carry her sister’s baby. It was completely crazy, but she knew it was the only way. The only good way. And she would do whatever necessary to convince him.
“I know the perfect person to be the surrogate,” she told Adam.
“Who?”
“Me.”
Two
Adam had imagined several possible scenarios of what Katy’s reaction would be when he told her his plans. He thought she might be excited. Grateful even that a part of Rebecca would live on in the baby. He had also considered her being upset, or even indignant, which proved to be much closer to the truth.
But not a single one of those scenarios included her offering to carry the baby herself. And as far as he was concerned, that wasn’t an option.
Admittedly he had approached Katy first because he figured she would be easily manipulated, but sweet little Katy had an edge now. She was a lot tougher than she used to be. And she was right about his lawyer’s advice. If there were a legal battle over the issue of the embryos, he would win. But it could drag on for years. He didn’t want to wait that long. He was ready now. And though allowing her to be the surrogate would significantly ease any opposition from her family, he could see an entire new series of problems arise as a result.
“I can’t ask you to do that,” he told her.
“You didn’t ask. I offered.”
“I’m not sure if you fully understand the sacrifice it will be. Physically and emotionally.”
“I have friends who have gone through pregnancies, so I know exactly what to expect.”
“I imagine that knowing a pregnant person and being one are two very different things.”
“I want to do it, Adam.”
He could see that, but the idea had trouble written all over it. In every language.
He tried a different angle. “How will your … ‘significant other’ feel about this?”
“That won’t be an issue. I see Willy Jenkins occasionally, but he isn’t what I would call significant. We’re more like … friends with benefits, if you know what I mean.”
He did, and for some ridiculous reason he wanted to string this Jenkins guy up by his toes. To him she would always be Rebecca’s baby sister. Little Katy.
But Katy was a grown woman. Twenty-seven or -eight, if memory served. It was none of his business who she was friends with.
Or why.
“The process could take a year,” he told her. “Longer if it takes more than one try. What if you meet someone?”
“Who the heck am I going to meet? Peckins has a population of eight hundred. Most of the men in town I’ve known since kindergarten. If I was going to fall madly in love with one of them, I’d have done it by now.”
He tried a different angle. “Have you thought of the physical toll it could take on your body?”
“Look who you’re talking to,” she said, gesturing to her casual clothing, the ash-blond hair pulled back in a ponytail. “I’m not like Rebecca. I don’t obsess about my weight, or worry about things like stretch marks. And you won’t find anyone more responsible. I don’t smoke or take drugs, not even over-the-counter pain relievers. I have an occasional beer, but beyond that I don’t drink, so giving it up isn’t a problem. Not to mention that I’m healthy as horse. And my doctor never fails to point out at my annual physical that I have a body built for childbearing.”
She certainly did. She had the figure of a fifties pinup model. A time when women looked like women, not pre-pubescent boys. In his opinion Rebecca had always been too obsessed with her weight and her looks, as though she thought he would love her less if she didn’t look perfect 100 percent of the time. Even during chemo she never failed to drag herself out of bed to put on makeup. And when she could no longer get out of bed, she had the nurse do it for her.
The familiar stab of pain he felt when he thought of her that way pierced the shell around his heart from the inside out.
Katy surprised him by reaching across the table and taking his hand. What surprised him even more was the tingling sensation