“I’m so sorry.” She smoothed a palm across the back of the boy’s gray dinosaur T-shirt. “For you both. I can’t imagine how difficult that transition has been to deal with, especially when you’re grieving such a tragic loss.”
She glanced back at James to find him studying her.
His fixed attention rattled her, reminding her that he’d just admitted to being a single man. Warmth rose to her cheeks and she looked away, trying to remember the thread of the conversation.
“You could help us immeasurably.” James’s voice was pitched low in deference to the weary baby between them, but the tone made her think of pillow talk. Intimate conversations between two lovers who knew one another incredibly well.
Who would have guessed a whisper could be so seductive?
“I’m—um.” She tried to think beyond murmured confidences and came up blank, her brain already supplying images of tangled sheets and limbs. “And how would that be?”
“You arrived at my door looking for a compromise on your sister’s bid, and we’ve just found the perfect one.” He pointed to Teddy, who had stopped moving, his eyes closed. Breathing even. “If you’ll take the job of Teddy’s nanny, you can consider Gail’s debt paid in full.”
His suggestion staggered her. Called her from her sensual daydreams.
“She bid one hundred thousand dollars,” Lydia reminded him, wondering where she should lay Teddy down for a nap. “You’d be forgiving the cost of a home for the sake of child care. That’s far too generous of you.”
He shook his head, his jaw flexing. “I haven’t kept a nanny for more than two weeks because he’s such a handful, between the tantrums and days of being withdrawn. We could have a trial period to see how it worked out.” He seemed to warm to the idea quickly, laying out terms. “If you stayed for a trial period of two months, then I’d forgive half the debt. Stick around for a year, and we’ll call it even.”
“You can’t be serious.” She got distracted around him after a few minutes. How could she ever work in his home for a year?
“I’m running out of options and I can’t afford this much time away from my ranching business. You have no idea what it would be worth to me to know my brother’s boy is in good hands.”
She couldn’t miss the desperation in his eyes. In his voice. But as much as she felt called to help him, it wasn’t her debt to pay. Gail was the one who should be providing free nanny services, not her. Still, another thought trickled through, making her realize things weren’t quite so simple. No matter how strongly she felt that Gail needed to clean up her own messes, Lydia recognized that without James’s clearing the debt with the charity, the Walker name might have become the kiss of death for a new business in a close-knit community like Royal. While she wrestled with what to do, she turned her attention to the sleeping baby between them.
“First things first, we should find a comfortable place for Teddy.” She reached to lift him, but James moved closer.
“I can get him.” He slipped his hands around the boy’s waist to pick him up, his hand briefly brushing against her calf and causing a whole riot of sensations in her before he shifted the child to rest on his shoulder. “And you don’t need to make a decision about my offer right now. If you’re okay with continuing our meeting another time, I should be leaving for the day anyhow. I think he’ll stay asleep if I put him in his car seat.”
Lydia tried to ignore the residual tingling in her skin. She appreciated the opportunity he was giving her to think about his proposal. And distance from his striking good looks would give her the chance to think with a clearer head.
“You have someone to watch him today?” Lydia didn’t mean to sound like she was questioning his arrangements for the child. She was just trying to keep the focus on Teddy and not the heady jolt of attraction she was feeling.
She stood to follow James toward the door.
“My foreman’s daughter is home from college for the holidays, and she agreed to give me afternoon help two days a week for the next month. That’s as much child care as I’ve got covered when I’m not here. Provided she doesn’t give up on Teddy, too, when he has his next atomic meltdown.” He sounded frustrated and she understood why.
James shouldered the leather diaper bag that the child care worker had set near the door to his office, then lifted his Stetson from the coat rack and dropped it into place. When she stepped out of the room, he locked the door behind them. She couldn’t miss the way his large hands cradled the child so gently against his broad chest. The gesture called to her, reminding her of dreams she had for her own children one day.
Not that she was thinking of James in that way. She must be overtired and stressed to let her imagination wander like that. The sooner she made tracks out of here and away from James’s tempting presence, the better.
As they left the clubhouse and strode out into the December sunlight, James tugged a blanket from an exterior pocket of the diaper bag and laid it over the sleeping boy. The day was mild, but with the holidays approaching, the temperatures had been dropping. Lydia tipped her face into the breeze, grateful for the cooler air on her too-warm skin.
“I researched the child care facilities in town when I got the idea to open a full-service business here, and I know there’s a definite need.” Royal was thriving, and the demographics for young families were a particular area of growth. “I’ve heard there are waiting lists at the most coveted places.”
James nodded in response. “You’ve got that right. When I called one day care they said families reserve space when they’re pregnant, even knowing they might not put a child into the system for a full year.” He sighed wearily. “The last few months have been an education—from learning how to change a diaper to educating myself on how to avoid tree nuts for his allergy.”
“He has allergies?” Lydia was accustomed to the dietary needs for children with the most common allergies. Her brother broke out in hives if he even got in the same room as a peanut.
“Just tree nuts. But I live in fear I’ll leave the house without the EpiPen.” He huffed out a long breath, clearly feeling the same stress that many new parents went through. “I hope you’ll consider my offer, Lydia. Maybe you can work for me, and your sister can do something to repay you.”
“I’d need to figure out a way to pay my bills in the meantime.” It was true she was between nanny jobs right now, but she had hoped to devote the extra time toward working on her house, doing some of the simpler labor she didn’t want to pay a contractor for.
James tucked the blanket more securely around the baby’s feet, a gesture that touched her all the more now that she knew he wasn’t the baby’s father. He was simply a man trying to do his best taking care of a child he hadn’t been ready for.
“And I can’t put a price on what it would mean to me to have qualified help with Teddy.” He nodded at a gray-haired cowboy walking into the club. Then, once the man had passed, James turned to Lydia again. “Forget about Gail and the charity money. The universe is smiling on me by having a nanny walk into my office at a time in my life when I’m hanging on by my fingernails. Consider this a job offer for whatever you usually charge. I would have sought you out before this if I’d known about you.”
“I couldn’t possibly—”
“Please.” He cut her off, his tone laced with an urgency—a need—she hadn’t anticipated. “Just think about it. Start with the trial period and sign on for two months. See how it goes. If things don’t work out, I’ll understand.”
Swallowing her protests, she nodded. “It’s a very generous offer and I will consider it.”
He seemed to relax then, a tension