But when he wasn’t mentally strutting around like the prize rooster in the henhouse, he was scared spit-less. He’d had reasons for avoiding fatherhood and none of them had changed just because he’d accidentally gotten a woman pregnant. He had skeletons in his closet, and Tess had every right to know what they were.
On the other hand, maybe he didn’t have to drag out those skeletons in the next twenty-four hours.
* * *
During dinner, Tess broke the news of her pregnancy to Rosie and Herb. That’s when she learned that Rosie considered the unborn baby her future grandchild.
“I realize that’s slightly unconventional.” She passed Tess a basket of warm yeast rolls. “But most of those boys call us Mom and Dad, so why not? Babies need grandparents to spoil them rotten.”
Tess laughed, charmed by the prospect of Rosie and Herb as her son’s grandparents. “I suppose they do. Mine treated me like a princess. I came along after they’d given up on having any, so I really did get spoiled. I’m sad that they’re gone now. They would have loved fussing over another baby.”
“Of course they would! Sophie—that’s Damon and Phil’s daughter—is the light of my life. She’ll be a year by the time your little guy is born. That’s old enough for her to understand that she has a new baby cousin. I can’t wait to see them together. It’ll be adorable.”
“Yes, well...” Tess had allowed herself to get carried away by Rosie’s enthusiasm. “I’m not sure how often I’ll get over here. I’ll do my best but...”
“Oh.” Rosie shared a quick glance with Herb. “You’ll have to excuse me, Tess. I was so focused on the baby that I didn’t think about anything else. Zeke will be back on the circuit by then, not living next door. I shouldn’t make assumptions about how the two of you will work everything out. For all I know, you’re going to travel with him.”
She shuddered at the thought. “I plan to raise the baby on my own.”
Rosie gave a little gasp of surprise. “Does Zeke know?”
“I told him tonight.”
Herb frowned. “And what did he say?”
“Not much. But when we met he told me he didn’t want kids. In my opinion, a reluctant father is worse than no father at all.”
Herb’s frown deepened. “But Zeke has a financial obligation to his son.”
She met Herb’s worried gaze. “Legally, yes, but I’m relieving him of that. I’m financially capable of raising this child and, despite my right to child support, I couldn’t in good conscience take money from a man who won’t be participating in the process.”
Rosie and Herb greeted that statement with a long silence. Tess wished circumstances could be different for these two wonderful people. But this baby was a gift and she refused to let him become an obligation to anyone, least of all the man who’d unintentionally fathered him.
Finally, Rosie took a deep breath. “I can understand why you feel that way. But we’d love to be part of the process, so I hope you’ll bring that sweet baby over to see us now and then.”
“I will.” She reached over and squeezed Rosie’s arm. “I promise.”
After that, Rosie demonstrated her conversational skills, because the baby and Zeke weren’t mentioned again. Tess’s admiration for Rosie’s social abilities grew as they spent the rest of the meal discussing various teaching methods. They talked about the differences and similarities between Tess’s primary students and the teens that Rosie and Herb had worked with, both as foster parents and founders of Thunder Mountain Academy.
Immersed in her favorite subject, Tess lost track of time as they lingered over dessert. Rosie had made two pies: rhubarb and cherry. Herb was the only one eating the cherry pie as Tess and Rosie each enjoyed a generous slice of the rhubarb topped with vanilla ice cream. Judging from Rosie’s comment to Zeke before he left, he was a fan of this particular flavor, too. But Rosie never brought it up.
Tess helped with the dishes before bidding Rosie and Herb good-night. She was touched by their willingness to accept whatever plan she had for this baby. Her own parents weren’t likely to react the same way and she dreaded the confrontation when she told them. But she didn’t have to worry about that tonight.
After a satisfying meal with two people who made her feel at home, she was more than ready for a good night’s sleep. Her last thought was of Zeke’s full beard. In a way, it helped that he’d grown one because he looked so different from the man she’d tumbled into bed with back in April. She could more easily pretend he was a stranger, one she would never see again after tomorrow.
Zeke woke at dawn. Early morning light filtered through the leaves of a tree outside the window and he enjoyed watching the patterns created on the west wall. Once Damon and Phil had installed new flooring in the two smaller bedrooms, he’d move into one of them. He’d be sorry to leave the master bedroom, though.
Climbing out of bed, he headed into the bathroom. He rummaged in his shaving kit for a pair of manicure scissors and clipped off most of his beard. Then he took a razor to what was left.
A hot shower relieved some of the tension in his neck and shoulders, but it came back the minute he dried off. He dressed in his nicest shirt and jeans, and polished his boots. His hat got a good brushing, too. He’d let it get dusty and that wouldn’t do for what he had in mind.
Damon and Phil would arrive in a couple of hours with little Sophie, but they’d have to manage the baby without his help. He wrote them a quick note explaining that he had an errand to run at Thunder Mountain and couldn’t be sure when he’d be back. If all went well, he might be gone all day.
Grabbing his keys, he locked up the house and walked out to his truck. It could use a wash, but he didn’t have the time. He used his hand to clean off the passenger seat before walking around to the driver’s side and sliding in behind the wheel.
On the way to Thunder Mountain, he had the same feeling in the pit of his stomach that he always got right before he stepped into the arena for a performance. So he followed the same technique and, several deep breaths later, he was calmer.
The academy kids were busy down at the barn taking care of morning chores when he pulled up in front of the house. He saw Cade and Herb with them, supervising. Cade looked up and waved. By now he probably knew the score. Herb would have filled him in.
Zeke lifted a hand in acknowledgment before mounting the steps to the porch. He rapped on the screen door and opened it while calling out a greeting. For anyone who’d lived at the ranch, that was all Rosie and Herb required. The door was nearly always open for their family.
Zeke had never let himself fully accept being a part of Herb and Rosie’s family. Counting on something to stay the same was a recipe for disappointment. While the other guys called Rosie and Herb “Mom and Dad,” he didn’t. They referred to the ranch as “home” but he hadn’t made the mistake of labeling it that way. Even so, he enjoyed the privilege of walking into the house whenever he wanted.
“In the kitchen!” Rosie responded.
He found her predictable breakfast routine a comfort, but he’d never taken that for granted, either. He could tell some of the other guys did.
When he walked into the kitchen, it was just Rosie and Sharon, the cook they’d hired to help fix meals for the academy students. She was a middle-aged lady with short brown hair and a great laugh. No Tess.
“Hey, Zeke.” Rosie