She flinched. ‘Marriage doesn’t always mean commitment.’
He winced. ‘Sorry, honey. I didn’t mean to rip open old wounds.’
‘I know you didn’t.’ Alex didn’t always think. Mainly because he did things at a hundred miles an hour and his head was stuffed full of the past—just like her own. Which was one of the reasons why she’d always got on so well with him.
He took her hand and squeezed it briefly. ‘But you know what I mean. My reputation’s going to count against me. The Hunter, a gypsy vagabond.’
She rolled her eyes. ‘You’re hardly a vagabond, Alex.’ Even though he did have itchy feet and didn’t tend to stay long in one place.
‘But I’m part gypsy. My mother says I’m a throwback to her grandfather—’
‘Who met your great-grandmother when she accompanied your great-great-grandfather to a dig in Egypt in the nineteen twenties, and your great-grandfather fell in love with her,’ Isobel finished. She knew the story, and she’d always privately thought it really romantic.
Archaeology was in Alex’s blood. And so too was the gypsy heritage. Which was why ‘The Hunter’ was his perfect screen persona: dressed in jeans with a white shirt, and a battered Akubra hat worn at a rakish angle, Alex Richardson made women swoon. That and his dark curls, his hair worn slightly too long, his exotic olive skin, and those piercing light grey eyes, completely unexpected with the rest of his colouring.
‘Look, I’ve spent the last few years travelling the world. On digs or for the show, admittedly, but still travelling.’
‘Which shows commitment to your job,’ she pointed out.
‘It’s not enough.’ He shook his head in apparent frustration. ‘The series played me up as the sort who won’t obey orders—a maverick who’ll go his own way regardless.’
She couldn’t argue with that. Besides, that was exactly what Alex was like—not that there was any point in telling him.
‘So that’s why I need a wife. To prove I’m settled.’
‘I still think it’s a crazy reason to get married. And why ask me?’
‘I already told you. Because you’re settled.’
That stung, and she couldn’t help sniping, ‘You mean I’m staid and boring.’
He laughed. ‘No. Just I’ve known you for ever. You’re the girl next door.’
‘Strictly speaking, I haven’t lived next door to you since I was thirteen and you went to Oxford,’ she said dryly. ‘Which is the best part of seventeen years ago.’
‘You were still there when I came home for the holidays,’ he reminded her.
The girl next door. As familiar as wallpaper. Alex hadn’t noticed her as a woman.
At her continued silence, he sighed. ‘Look, I never planned to get married. Archaeology’s my life—just as the museum is yours. There isn’t room in my life for another relationship.’
She raised an eyebrow.
He winced. ‘Sorry, Bel. That came out wrong. Mouth in gear, brain not. What I mean is, if I’m going to get married, I want to marry someone I like a lot. Someone I’ve got a lot in common with. Someone I trust.’
It should’ve warmed her that he felt that way about her. Trusted her. Liked her a lot. Exactly the way she felt about him. But she couldn’t help asking, ‘What about love?’
He lifted one shoulder in a half-shrug. ‘I don’t believe in it.’
She knew where he was coming from. She didn’t believe in love any more, either. She’d loved Gary, but it hadn’t been enough to make their marriage work. Though at the same time, marriage without love seemed … wrong, somehow. ‘All three of your sisters are married,’ she remarked. ‘And if they weren’t happy and in love with their husbands—’
‘I’d take their husbands apart,’ he admitted. ‘Very slowly. And remove their hearts with a rusty spoon.’
Although Alex rolled his Rs and his eyes, she wasn’t sure that he was being entirely dramatic.
‘But it’s different for the girls.’
Sexism? From Alex? Now that she hadn’t expected. ‘Since when did you turn into a chauvinist?’
He frowned. ‘I’m not. It’s got nothing to do with gender. Just that …’ he lifted one shoulder in a half-shrug ‘… I’m not like them.’
‘So this marriage business—you’re looking for someone you like, someone who shares your interests, and who’s not going to tie you down.’
‘I’m not planning to have a string of girlfriends or be unfaithful to my wife, if that’s what you’re asking.’
Alex dated a lot. Which meant he had a lot of sex. If he was giving that up … did that mean he was planning to have sex only with his wife?
With her?
Oh, Lord.
The last twelve years suddenly unravelled, back to when she’d been eighteen and Alex had kissed her. Just once. But what a ‘once’ it had been. He’d actually taken her breath away. For one mad moment she’d thought that Alex had noticed her—that instead of seeing her as just his little sister’s best friend, the girl he’d known for years, he’d seen her as a soul mate. Someone who shared his interests. Someone he was attracted to. And then she’d realised he was being kind. Showing her that just because her rat of a boyfriend had dumped her, it didn’t mean that she’d never be kissed again.
He’d even said as much. Said that she’d soon find someone else. Added that she had a whole world to conquer.
That kiss hadn’t meant the same thing to him as it had to her. And Isobel was pretty sure things hadn’t changed since then. Alex saw her as a friend—a close friend, but just as a friend.
So no way would this marriage work.
She couldn’t do it.
She’d already ended up in one loveless marriage, and she really couldn’t face starting another on the same basis. She dragged in a breath. ‘I’m sorry, Alex. I can’t marry you.’
ALEX schooled his features into neutral. ‘Why not?’
‘Because it’s wrong to get married without loving each other.’
He flapped a dismissive hand. ‘Of course I love you, Bel.’
‘But not in that way, Alex. And I’m not putting myself through that again.’
Alex stared at her. ‘Hang on. Are you telling me Gary didn’t love you? That he was unfaithful to you?’
She shook her head. ‘He didn’t break his marriage vows, no. Let’s just leave it that our marriage turned into a mess.’
She looked uncomfortable, and Alex knew Isobel wasn’t telling him the whole story—but he also knew not to push her. She’d talk to him when she was ready. She always had.
‘Though it didn’t take him very long to find someone else.’ Isobel dragged in a breath. ‘His new partner’s just had their first baby.’
That had clearly hurt her. He’d never asked Isobel why she’d split up with Gary—because