After eating a small dinner of a poached egg and toast, she bathed and dressed with care. In spite of all her worries and anger with him, excitement bubbled in her at the thought of seeing Ryan.
As she dried her hair, her intercom buzzed. A florist wanted to get through the gate to deliver flowers. When she went to the door, a driver climbed out of a panel truck and came up the walk with a crystal vase containing a huge bouquet of daises and yellow tulips. She took the arrangement and carried it inside, where she set it on a table and paused to read the card.
“To the mother of my baby,” was scrawled there. “Can’t wait to see you.” It was signed with Ryan’s bold signature.
She shook her head, reminded that he wasn’t going away. She looked again at the card. The mother of my baby …
She placed the card carefully into the bouquet and carried it into her living area, placing it on the coffee table where he would see it. Then she finished dressing.
She let her long, straight blond hair fall freely over her shoulders. Wearing pale yellow slacks and a yellow-and-white cotton shirt and sandals, she gazed at her reflection, turning to look at her flat stomach.
Promptly at seven she heard his car. With a sigh, she braced herself to deal with him.
When she opened the door, the sight of him worked its unfailing magic. In a navy short-sleeved knit shirt and chinos, Ryan looked refreshed and his usual cheerful self.
“Come in. Would you like something to drink? Beer, water, wine, pop?” she asked as he entered.
“Cold beer would be good,” he said, closing the door. “What are you having?”
“Ice water,” she answered.
“I’ll help,” he said, walking beside her. “I know where things are now.” Like everything else he had been doing since learning about the pregnancy, his actions caused her both chagrin and amusement, because he took charge as if it were his kitchen. As soon as he handed her the glass of water and got his beer, they went into the family room and she motioned toward the flowers. “These are lovely.”
“Not nearly as gorgeous as the recipient,” he responded, setting down his beer and taking her ice water to place it on the coffee table. Her heart thudded when he turned to slide his arms around her waist.
“I went slowly last night. I don’t see much need to continue that.”
Her heartbeat quickened as she rested her hands on his forearms. Desire smoldered in his gaze as he watched her. “I disagree,” she replied. “I still want to take some time. We can get to know each other better.”
“Do you know how badly I want to hold and kiss you?” he asked in a husky voice, and her opposing emotions tangled fiercely. She needed him to ease up and give her space. At the same time, she ached to throw her arms around him and kiss him.
“Just wait,” she said, pushing lightly against his muscled chest. “Give me time here. It’s important to me, Ryan,” she said, in spite of her yearning to reach for him.
As she looked into his eyes, she wondered if he had any idea what he did to her heartbeat. The longer they stood with locked gazes, the more she wanted him, and the more difficult it was to push away and establish some space between them. His arm tightened around her waist, and what she craved became more important than what she should do.
“It’s been a long time, Ashley,” he whispered as his gaze dropped to her lips. He leaned down, covering her mouth with his, and his tongue touched hers. Engulfed by longing, she couldn’t resist him. She wrapped her arms around his neck as he drew her closer.
While her heart pounded, he leaned over her, kissing her deeply, his tongue stroking hers and building fires in her. The yearning was intense, insistent; her arguments seemed to go up in flames. She yielded to the moment, aware his kisses had comprised all her fantasies and dreams for months now.
In return she poured out her pent-up hunger, which had grown steadily. As he leaned over her, his hand wound in her locks and she tangled her fingers in his thick hair.
His manhood pressed against her. Clinging tightly to him, she moaned. She ached to be rid of the slightest barriers between them, but knew that couldn’t happen. Not now. Dimly, she realized she needed to regain control and stop, but not yet. She kissed him wildly, wanting him with all her being. He was exciting and desirable, the man of her dreams, the father of her child.
While they kissed, his hand slipped down her back and over her bottom to cup her against him. His kisses conveyed a desperate hunger, an intense need for her that made her want him even more in return.
He shifted her slightly and his fingers drifted over her breast, his feathery caress electrifying. She moaned again. His touch was a sweet torment that heightened her pleasure.
Finally, she pushed against his chest. When she did, he loosened his hold and she looked up at him. “We have to wait. I’m not ready,” she said, her breathlessness denying her words.
“Yes, you are,” he replied in a raspy voice. “And I’m more than ready. I’ve dreamed of you too many nights. I’ve thought about you more than you can possibly imagine.”
His words thrilled her, but she shook her head. “No, I can’t. We wait. There’s too much complicating our lives.”
“This is the best possible time to love each other.”
She twisted free and walked away from him, straightening her clothing and trying to get her emotions under control. She turned to face him.
His mouth was red and his expression conveyed his feelings. There was no question he was eager for her.
Fighting the urge to walk into his arms, she stayed where she was. “We need to talk about the future.”
“There are other ways to solve this and be happy.”
“Lust isn’t going to solve anything.”
“That isn’t how I would describe it. All right, Ashley, we’ll make some plans.”
“That’s exactly what I hoped to avoid. Ryan, I didn’t want you to know about the baby this soon because I knew you’d want to take charge. Let me deal with this. It’s my life, and you never wanted to become a father.”
“This is my baby, too, and you might as well get accustomed to the idea, because I’m not going away.” He spoke quietly, but she detected his unyielding tone.
She glared at him. “I want to have this baby and get settled. After that, let’s talk about what we’ll do.”
He crossed the room to take her hand. “This is so simple. Will you marry me?”
While her heartbeat fluttered, she hoped she kept her features impassive. She placed her hand on his cheek. “Your proposal is kind. Thank you, but no.”
“Dammit!” he snapped, while fire flashed in his eyes. “I’m not being kind. I’d like to marry you.”
“A week ago you wouldn’t have considered proposing. This is what you think you’re duty bound to do, and it’s generous of you. No, I’m sorry, but when I marry, I want it to be with someone I’m wildly in love with, who’s just as in love with me. You know we don’t have that relationship.” She shook her head. “No, Ryan. I knew you would propose, because I know you think you should.”
A muscle worked in his jaw and he got a piercing look in his eyes. Ashley braced for whatever he’d say next.
“We’re having a baby, which is the best possible reason to wed. Sex between us is fabulous—another dandy reason. Most times we’ve been out together, we’ve had a grand time, with the exception of breakfast this morning. We have simple backgrounds, and are in better times now, so we’re alike there,” he reminded her. While he talked, she had a suspicion he was fighting to maintain patience.
“We’re