‘No, you’re not.’
Sara was already retreating through the door when Matt went
after her. He didn’t know what had made him say what he had, but it was obvious she’d been hurt by his words. The trouble was, it was becoming more and more difficult not to show how he was feeling, and he wished he could explain it to her.
He caught her in the hall outside his study, his hand closing round her arm and bringing her to a halt. ‘Sara,’ he started again. ‘I’m sorry if I was short with you. When Rob gets on the phone it’s usually because he wants something that I can’t give him.’
‘I’m really not interested,’ she said, making an effort to release herself from his hold, and Matt gave an impatient sigh.
‘Listen to me,’ he said. ‘Rob Marco is my agent. He was ringing to ask why he hasn’t had the new manuscript. I was making the excuse that I still didn’t have a permanent nanny for Rosie.’
Sara’s brows arched scornfully. ‘So?’
‘So that’s why I said what I did,’ exclaimed Matt doggedly. ‘You probably thought I was criticising you. I wasn’t, whatever it sounded like. I was just trying to distract Rob from his impression that you’re really my girlfriend.’
‘Look, I really don’t care—’
‘No, but I do,’ muttered Matt, his patience wearing thin. ‘I’m telling you the truth, dammit. If I’d finished the damn manuscript we wouldn’t be having this conversation.’
‘I hope you’re not implying that I’m to blame for that,’ she countered coldly, stiffening her back, and Matt expelled a long breath.
He was trying hard not to be aware of her small breasts rising and falling in tempo with her increasing indignation, the widening gap between her tee shirt and jeans exposing the intriguing hollow of her navel. She was so incredibly sexy, with her face flushed, her eyes sparkling with aggravated fire. He could feel a sensuous warmth spreading from his fingers to every erogenous nerve in his body, and he knew he was getting dangerously close to combustion.
‘I didn’t say that,’ he said now, struggling to contain his frustration, and she uttered a triumphant snort.
‘Good,’ she said fiercely, and he had the sudden suspicion that she was using her anger to put a barrier between them. ‘Because I suggest that bottle of whisky on your desk is far more culpable than me!’
Matt choked on an oath. ‘Are you kidding?’ he gasped. ‘I’ve had one mouthful of Scotch and that’s all.’
‘So you say.’
‘It’s the truth.’ He was aware of a growing sense of outrage. ‘I’m not an alcoholic.’
‘Well, it isn’t even lunchtime yet,’ she persisted, and he shook his head in angry disbelief.
‘Where do you get off telling me what to do?’ he demanded, using his free hand to pull her round to face him, and then could have died with mortification when he saw her flinch.
It was obvious that she had encountered this kind of situation before and she expected the worst. The look in her eyes damned and humiliated him, and with a groan of anguish he hauled her into his arms.
‘God, I’m sorry,’ he muttered, one hand cradling the back of her neck while the other circled her waist. Silky hair brushed his fingers and her skin was incredibly soft beneath his hands. ‘Hell, Sara, don’t you know I would never hurt you?’
Her response was muffled, but he could feel the sudden wetness that was dampening his shirt. She was crying, and her distress assaulted him like acid on an open wound. He felt so powerless; so useless. He wanted to help her, but all he was doing was turning her against him, too.
‘Sara, Sara,’ he breathed, his fingers caressing her nape, and she did the unforgivable and turned her face up to his.
Her eyes were flooded with tears, but her expression was more forgiving than accusatory. Lashes, several shades darker than her hair, sparkled with jewelled drops, and Matt’s tongue itched to lick them away. She was so beautiful, so vulnerable, and the knowledge that he had no right to hold her like this was tearing him to pieces. Did she know what she was doing? he wondered. What she was doing to him? Of course she did, he assured himself. He was holding her too close for the swelling in his pants to be ignored.
Then, ‘Matt,’ she said huskily, and it was more than he could bear.
When her hand lifted to his face he caught it and brought her palm to his lips. But even that wasn’t enough. He wanted her so much, wanted more than he had any right to expect, and he might never have another chance like this.
Her eyes were wide now, her lips parted and unknowingly sensual. There was a moment when he might have drawn back, when he might have fought the demons that were riding him, but the sight of her tongue defeated him. When the pink tip appeared to circle her lips, he knew he had to taste it, and, cupping her face between his hands, he bent his head and kissed her.
‘Forgive me,’ he groaned, his tongue slipping into her mouth, and after only a momentary hesitation she yielded to his intimate caress.
He’d intended to be gentle with her. He was fairly sure that any relationship she’d had with her husband would not have been gentle, and he’d wanted there to be no confusion between who was holding her, who was kissing her now.
But the moment his mouth covered hers all reason deserted him. He was like a man in the desert who was suddenly presented with a flask of cool clear water and didn’t realise until that moment that he was dying of thirst. Maybe it was the way her lips opened to his, or the sensuous brush of her tongue. Or perhaps the devastating realisation he had that she was kissing him back.
Whatever, at that moment all bets were off. The heat that flared between them was automatic and uncontrollable, and Matt’s mind swam with the emotions she so easily aroused inside him. He was like a man possessed, and when she wound her arms around his waist and hooked her thumbs into his belt he swayed back against the wall behind him, taking her with him.
The blood was pounding in his head, thundering through his veins, making any kind of coherent thought impossible. She burrowed against him, making him overwhelmingly aware of the layers of fabric that divided them. His skin felt raw, sensitised. He had to fight the urge to peel her tee shirt from her and bury his face between her breasts.
His hands slid down her back as he continued to kiss her, lingering on the bare skin of her midriff that was so tantalisingly warm to his touch. The temptation to slide his hands beneath the tee shirt and caress the erect nipples that were straining the soft material was almost irresistible, but he dammed the impulse and cupped her rounded bottom instead.
Urging her against him was the purest form of torture, but it was worth it. Spreading his legs, he cradled her against the erection throbbing between his thighs. She rubbed herself against him and he wondered if she had any idea what she was inviting. How much more of this could he take without losing it completely?
And then she moaned.
It was a plaintive little sound, barely audible, in fact, but he heard it. For a moment he thought he’d hurt her. He was half afraid that his urgent hands had been too rough for her delicate skin. But then, with a shocking sense of his own insanity, he suddenly realised what was wrong.
With unsteady hands he managed to put some space between them, avoiding her eyes as he made some inane apology for touching her as he had. And all the while he chided himself for being a fool, for imagining that she had been as caught up in her emotions as he was. It wasn’t true. That grotesque little moan had proved it. He’d been making love to a woman who had undoubtedly been conditioned never to say no…
Chapter Ten
‘BUT