“Don’t you know I’m dying inside?”
“Of course you are. That’s why you need to be united with your son as soon as possible.”
“And give up the one I already love?” she cried out in anger.
“Signorina—”
Weak from emotion, she sank down on one of the kitchen chairs. Valentina had been waiting for this day, yet dreading it. She felt guilty over her fear that she’d see the baby she’d given birth to and she wouldn’t love it the way she loved Ric. It was a horrible thing to admit to herself, let alone her family.
Her birth baby had been loved and taken care of by another mother who had to be going through this same agony. The pain was so unbearable, Valentina could hardly breathe.
“Signorina?”
“I—I’m here.” Shock that this day had come made her slow to respond. If she hadn’t pursued this—if she hadn’t said anything, then she wouldn’t have to give up this little boy she adored. Her heart was torn into pieces.
“Since time is of the essence, if you can be at the hospital by noon with your baby, then the exchange can take place and your birth baby will be turned over to you. You need to be united with him as soon as possible.”
She moaned. “I’m devastated, Signor Conti.”
“I have no doubt of it. Do you have someone to help bring you to the hospital? You need to come to the outpatient entrance. When you sign in, you’ll be told where to go.”
“I—I don’t know if I can do this.” It took a minute to quiet her sobs. “Will I be able to talk to the mother who has been taking care of my baby?”
“It’s not hospital policy.”
“But that’s cruel!”
“I’m sorry, but we have to treat this like a closed adoption process. Everything sealed. Your privacy has been insured. The other parents don’t know your name, and you don’t know theirs.”
“I understand the legalities, but there are little things they should know about Ric.”
“Of course. Why don’t you write down your routine and any medicines and formula you’re using, anything the other parent needs to know.”
Sobs still shook her body.
“Signorina?”
“I’m here.”
“I’ll see you at noon. I realize this is very traumatic for you. It would be for anyone. The hospital will have a counselor on hand to help you deal with your grief. We’ll do everything we can for you.”
Can you make it all go away?
“Again, I’m so sorry, signorina.”
She clicked off, unable to say another word. It was already eight in the morning. Only a few more hours before she had to give him up. Valentina hurried through the house to the nursery, where she found Rini holding Ric. He was dressed to go to work, but he loved the baby and sought him out at every opportunity.
“I just got the call. Ric isn’t my baby. Your suspicions were right, too. I’m supposed to be at the hospital at noon to pick up my birth baby.”
Rini grimaced. “I’ll drive you.”
“But you have work. I know you’re having a problem with Signor Bruno and should be there to put out another fire.”
“That can wait. Nothing’s more important than helping you.”
“I wish to heaven I’d never asked for a DNA test.”
“You were acting on a mother’s intuition that turned out to be inspired.”
“But to pay this price—I don’t think I can do it.”
“Yes you can. Your birth baby is out there waiting for you. You’re the strongest woman I know. Don’t forget I’ll be there for you.”
She stared at the brother who’d been such a bulwark. “I know. You’ve always stood by me. I love you so much.” Valentina had never done anything on her own and felt shame that she’d always been dependent on family. In showing such bad judgment with Matteo, she felt a failure, but her family had never made her feel like one. Right now she had to prove to herself how strong she really was.
“I love you, too, Valentina. More than you know. Can I help you pack up some things?”
“I’m not sure what to take, but I’ll wrap him in the quilt I made.”
Rini patted the baby’s back. “The other mother will have everything Ric needs.”
Tears filled her eyes. “You’re right. I need to write down instructions for the parents since we won’t be meeting. If you’re willing to play with Ric, I’ll get myself ready and make the list they’ll need.”
At eleven they left for the hospital in Rini’s BMW. When they walked into the outpatient department and she’d checked in with her baby, she turned to her brother. “The woman at the desk said my family has to wait in the reception area.”
He nodded. “I’ll be right here.”
“I’m glad no one in the family knows about this yet. I need time to deal with it first, then I’ll tell Papà.”
Rini gave her a hug before she turned away from him in pain. Signor Conti met her inside the double doors.
“Come down the hall to this room.” Valentina clutched Ric to her heart while she followed him to a small room with chairs and a table. “Again, I’m devastated, signorina. This is a terrible situation, and I will do whatever I can to help.”
She nodded in a daze. “What happens next?”
The second she’d asked the question, a nurse appeared at the door. Signor Conti looked at Valentina with anxious eyes. “If you’ll give the baby to the nurse, then yours will be brought to you.”
But Ric is mine.
Valentina’s pain had reached its zenith. She broke down sobbing. “I don’t know if I can do this, but I h-have to,” she stammered. “If the other parents want to know, I named him Riccardo. Here’s the list of information to give them.”
Signor Conti took it from her. Valentina kissed Ric’s cheeks, then gave him up to the nurse. She thought she’d die when the three of them left the room.
Is this really happening? Her body felt like ice.
In a minute the head of the hospital returned with the nurse, who carried a baby wrapped in a darling blue-and-white quilt. Valentina could hardly breathe as she walked over and put the infant in her arms. Signor Conti said, “I was told his name is Vitiello, but his nickname is Vito. I’ll give you a few minutes to get acquainted, then I’ll be back.” He put a list made by the other woman on the table, and they both left the room.
Taking a deep breath she looked into the face of her birth son.
A cry escaped her lips.
Without doubt his facial bone structure was Valentina’s. She saw shades of her mother, as well. Her beloved mother who was no longer here to turn to for love and advice. The baby had deep blue eyes. His pale blond hair—the way it grew—was hers and Matteo’s. She carefully unwrapped him to check his toes.
He’d been dressed in a cute one-piece polo suit in navy and white. She could tell he’d been given perfect care and was thriving, but his little chin had started to wobble, tugging at her heartstrings. Valentina was a stranger to him, but she realized he belonged to her. All of a sudden he started to cry, wrenching