“We’ll see,” Elliott told her. “Now, scoot.”
Only after they were both gone did he breathe a sigh of relief. He’d adored Daisy and Mack from the moment he’d gotten involved with Karen, but being a stepfather was still a challenge. Their personalities had already been well-formed when he’d come into their lives, and he still wavered between stern disciplinarian and outsider.
He’d mentioned adopting them early on, but Karen had seemed oddly resistant to the idea, so he’d let it go. He supposed it didn’t really matter, as long as both children knew he loved them as if they were his own. And after some initial hesitation, his mother had welcomed them into her life as full-fledged grandchildren to be enveloped in hugs and fed an endless supply of chocolate chip cookies. His nieces and nephews treated them as cousins. It sometimes seemed he was the only one who felt uncertain about his role in their lives.
Just when he was starting to fret about that yet again, Daisy emerged from her room, walked into the kitchen and threw her arms around him in the kind of impulsive gesture that was increasingly rare now that she was growing up.
“I love you,” she whispered against his chest. “I wish you were my dad.”
Holding her close, Elliott felt his eyes sting with tears. “I am your dad in every way that matters, little one. You can always count on me.”
She gazed up at him with those big eyes of hers. “Will you come to the father-daughter dance at school with me? I wasn’t going to go, because I don’t even know where my dad is, but if you’d come, it would be okay.”
He saw the surprising hint of fear in her eyes and knew she’d wondered if she was overstepping somehow, yet more evidence that even after all this time, their roles weren’t so clearly defined.
“I’d be honored,” he assured her, deeply touched by the invitation.
“Do you think it will be okay with Mom?”
The question gave him pause. He could only assume Karen would be fine with it. Surely she wouldn’t want Daisy to feel left out on such an important occasion.
“I’ll talk it over with her,” he promised. “When is this dance?”
“Next Friday,” Daisy told him. “I have to get a ticket tomorrow.”
“How much do you need?”
“Just ten dollars.”
Elliott gave her the money, then promised, “I’ll speak to your mother tonight.” He studied her expression. “Is that why you wanted to wait up? Did you want to speak to her about this first?”
She nodded. “Sometime she gets sad when I ask about things like this, like she feels bad that she’s disappointed me.” She regarded him earnestly. “But she didn’t. It’s not her fault Daddy went away. And besides, she found you.”
“The next best thing, huh?” he said, a wry note in his voice she probably didn’t understand.
“Not the next best,” she replied, then added adamantly, “The very best.”
And with that, Daisy captured yet another piece of his heart forever.
4
Despite his best intentions, Elliott fell asleep on the sofa before Karen got home from work. In the morning, both he and Karen overslept, and in the ensuing rush to get Daisy and Mack off to school, he never did have a chance to talk to her about Daisy’s school dance. After that, it slipped his mind.
It was two days later, again over a rushed breakfast, when Daisy was the one who mentioned it to her mother.
“I’m going to need a new dress for the dance, Mom,” she said.
Karen regarded her with a perplexed expression. “What dance?”
“The father-daughter dance next Friday.” Daisy turned an accusing look on Elliott. “Didn’t you tell her?”
“Sorry. I forgot,” he admitted, chagrined by the omission. “Your mom and I will talk about it after I drop you and Mack off at school, okay?”
Daisy gave him a panicked look. “But we’re going, right? You promised. I already bought the ticket.”
“We’re going,” he assured her, avoiding Karen’s gaze as he said it.
As soon as he’d driven the kids to school, he returned home to find Karen waiting for him at the kitchen table, a cup of coffee in hand and a frown on her face. It was obvious she was ticked off…again.
“Please don’t make too much of this,” he said. “Daisy told me about the dance a couple of nights ago. She was so afraid she wouldn’t be able to go, but I said I’d take her. We both intended to discuss it with you first, but I fell asleep. You didn’t wake me when you came in and I just forgot.”
She sighed. “I see.”
It was evident she was still upset. What he couldn’t be sure about was why. Was it the fact he hadn’t discussed it with her or because he was overstepping by agreeing to go? Too many conversations these days seemed to be minefields for which he held no map.
“Okay, Karen, I can tell you’re not happy about this,” he began. “Does it bother you that I agreed to go to a father-daughter dance with Daisy? Was I out of line to agree?”
She shook her head at once. “Of course not. What bothers me, once again, is that you didn’t mention it to me.”
“I just explained what happened.”
“And I understand how easy it is for things like this to slip through the cracks,” she admitted. “I really do. I don’t know why I let it make me so crazy. It’s a dance, for goodness’ sakes. And I can see how badly she wants to go. Elliott, I’m sorry for turning it into some kind of issue. I really am.”
He watched her closely and, despite the careful words, realized that there was more going on. It finally dawned on him what it was. “This dance involves buying a fancy dress,” he said with sudden understanding. “A dress that’s not really in our budget.”
She nodded. “That’s definitely part of it. I know the whole money thing worries me way too much, Elliott. You’re nothing like Ray. We’ve even been able to save for a baby, but the dress on top of the whole gym thing? It’s like the straw that broke the camel’s back. I guess it’s just a knee-jerk reaction, but I don’t know how to respond any differently when these unexpected expenses come up. Panic just crawls up the back of my throat and I can’t seem to stop it.”
Though money had never been plentiful in his own family, Elliott and his sisters had never wanted for anything. It was harder for him to grasp just how terrible things had been for Karen, especially after Ray had walked out on her. She’d been in danger of being evicted from her apartment more than once, in danger of being fired from Sullivan’s because she’d had to bail on her job too frequently due to crises with the kids that she’d been left alone to handle. Because of the debt Ray had left behind, she’d teetered at the edge of bankruptcy. It had taken all of her emotional resources and her energy to avoid it.
When they’d married, she’d insisted they plan their combined budget down to the penny and obsessed over every expense that had exceeded their projections. He understood her need to feel in control, but he also understood that with kids they needed wiggle room for things like this dance.
“We have a contingency fund,” he reminded her.
“For emergencies, not a dress.”
“For Daisy this amounts to an emergency,” he said reasonably. “Going to this dance really matters to her. It’s not about a party. It’s about having a dad.”
Karen met his gaze, looking chagrined. “I know