‘That’s okay…’ He was incredibly calm, unlike Alison. ‘Thirty-five weeks is just fine. Alison, there’s a first-aid box on the bike.’ There was, the hire company had made sure of that, but her hands were shaking so much she could hardly open the clip, and in the end it was Nick who came over and waded through it. There wasn’t much, but there were gloves and Nick pulled them on and told her to do the same then he headed back to the car and gave instructions.
‘Alison.’ She was aware he’d repeated it. ‘Can you help me get Carly into the back?’
She helped the pregnant woman, rolled up a beach towel she found into a pillow and made her a bit more comfortable so she was semi-prone and though Richard was clearly beyond relieved there was a doctor present there was actually very little they needed to do, because nature was taking good care of both patients. All that was required from Nick were a few words of encouragement as he held the baby’s head and guided the new life into the world.
‘The head’s out.’ His voice was calm and Alison looked over his shoulder. She was holding Richard’s T-shirt ready to wrap the babe, and it was all under control, except her heart was still thudding, she could feel the sun beating on her head and hear the distant blare of sirens. But the baby wasn’t waiting for them—with just one final push the body was delivered and there was a bellow of rage from a rather small baby as Nick delivered it onto Carly’s stomach.
‘She’s okay?’ Carly checked, and Nick grinned.
‘He’s great.’
‘I’m having a girl,’ Carly insisted, pulling up her baby boy, but it was a happy mistake and from Richard’s shout of joy, he wasn’t complaining.
The arrival of the ambulance brought comfort rather than relief. Todd and his partner were wonderful with the new parents and baby. Richard cut the cord and then the paramedics transferred Carly to a stretcher.
Nick was on a high. There was a euphoria to him, and he stood with his arm around Alison as the stretcher was loaded into the ambulance.
‘How good was that?’ Nick grinned, with all the joy of someone who finally, absolutely, definitely loved their job. ‘How good was that?’
Only Alison didn’t answer, uncomfortable suddenly as Todd climbed out from the back and closed the ambulance door and she wriggled out of Nick’s arm, remembering they were keeping things away from work.
She could feel Todd’s eyes roam her body, feel her breasts loose without a bra, and as, embarrassed, she ran a hand through her hair she felt leaves and knew, knew how she looked, knew what Todd was thinking.
‘Nice work!’ Todd winked at Nick when he’d closed the ambulance and Alison stood with her cheeks flaming. ‘Good to get an easy one.’
‘Thanks very much.’ Nick shook his hand and all she could see as the ambulance drove away was the car against a tree and all she felt was reckless, and Alison loathed it. All she felt was a tart Nick had taken to the hills—so very easily, as Todd had pointed out.
‘Thanks very much!’ she hurled at him. ‘Did you not hear what he was insinuating?’
‘What?’ Nick frowned.
‘“Good to get an easy one”!’
‘Alison.’ Nick shook his head. ‘He was talking about the birth.’
‘No!’ She felt sick, she actually felt sick. ‘He was talking about me.’
And coming down from the high of the birth Nick started to see it, but Alison didn’t want to hear his apology.
‘I want to go home.’
‘You’re going to let what he said ruin—’
‘It’s already ruined,’ Alison said. ‘And even if we do patch it up, it will be ruined next week.’
‘That’s what I brought you here to talk about.’ He hadn’t meant to say it like this, hadn’t meant to just blurt it out, but she left him with no choice. ‘I’m going to ring work and tell them I’m not coming back early.’ For Alison hope flared, but it was fleeting, so fleeting it was gone before it was recognised. ‘I want to do Asia.’
She could have slapped him.
‘With you,’ Nick said quickly. ‘I do have to go to this wedding in New Zealand but, look, I’ve been thinking about it…’ All night he’d been thinking about it. He saw the flash of tears in her eyes, but he hadn’t finished yet. ‘Why don’t you come—just for a few weeks, however much annual leave you’ve got…’ He was finding this awkward, he knew she was proud. ‘I know you must be stretched with the mortgage and everything, I’ll sort out the tickets and things…’ Alison screwed her eyes closed. ‘We can have a couple of weeks away, just us.’ And it sounded perfect, almost.
But then she’d have to come back.
‘It’s not that easy.’
‘None of this is easy,’ Nick said. ‘Alison, surely you can have a holiday, a few weeks of fun.’ And that word jolted, because that was what this was to him, she reminded herself, fun and a holiday that he wanted to extend—take the good sex with him, and slowly dis-mantle her heart. She wanted to nod, to say yes, to carry on the crazy ride, but she was scared to.
‘I can’t.’ She shook her head in fury. ‘I can’t just up and leave.’
‘Won’t,’ Nick said, and the pounding pulse in her head stopped for a second and he said it again. ‘You won’t come.’
‘You don’t know what you’re talking about.’ How dared he? Except Nick did.
‘You didn’t even consider it before you said no.’
‘You don’t know how hard things are for me. I had a massive row with my mother last night…’ Stunned, she watched as he pulled out an imaginary violin. ‘You bastard.’
‘You’ve had me pegged as one from the start.’ Yes, he was being mean, but finally he was angry. ‘I’m asking you to come with me, or at least to just think about coming with me.’
‘And I’m telling you I can’t.’
‘You can’t, can you?’ Finally he got it. ‘It’s not your mum holding you back, Alison.’
‘Just leave it.’
‘No.’ He couldn’t and he wouldn’t. ‘It’s not just your mum.’
‘Let’s just finish it.’ If she was being unreasonable, well, she felt unreasonable. ‘Let’s just finish it here.’
And she did.
When the police arrived and summoned a tow truck, and a couple pulled over in their car and asked if there was anything they could do—actually, there was something.
‘Could you give me a lift, please?’
IT HAD to be better this way, Alison told herself as she ignored Nick’s texts over the next few days and tried to get used to lugging around a broken heart.
The dazzling blond doctor was a just a little less so over the coming week.
Tired, a bit distracted and to the rest of the team just a little less fun, but he was thorough and kind to the patients and sometimes, quite a lot actually, she felt his eyes follow hers, and sometimes they frowned just a touch when their eyes met, because the Alison he had known simply wasn’t there any more.
He was kicking himself, angry with himself about how he had handled it. But he was angry with her too—at how readily she could let them go, at how she just retreated back into her quiet,