Did she signal her irritation? Was that why he rattled out a question spoken like someone who was expecting an apologetic denial as an answer?
‘Is something wrong?’
This was her cue to say no, nothing was wrong. To pat the edge of the bed and slant him a compliant smile because that was what she would normally have done. But Darcy wasn’t in a compliant mood today. She’d heard a song on the radio just before leaving work. A song which had taken her back to a place she hadn’t wanted to go to and the mother she’d spent her life trying to forget.
Yet it was funny how a few random chords could pluck at your heartstrings and make you want to screw up your face and cry. Funny how you could still love someone even though they’d let you down, time after time. That had been the real reason she’d sent Renzo’s driver away. She’d wanted to walk to the Tube so that her unexpected tears could mingle with the rain. She’d hoped that by coming here and having her Italian lover take her to bed, it might wipe away her unsettled feelings. But it seemed to have done the opposite. It had awoken a new restlessness in her. It had made her realise that great sex and champagne in the shadows of a powerful man’s life weren’t the recipe for a happy life—and the longer she allowed it to continue, the harder it would be for her to return to the real world. Her world.
She finished her tea and put the cup down, the subtle taste of peppermint and rose petals still lingering on her lips. It was time for the affair to fade out, like the credits at the end of the film. And even though she was going to miss him like crazy, she was the one who needed to start it rolling.
She made her voice sound cool and non-committal. ‘I’m thinking I won’t be able to see you for a while.’
That had his attention. He turned away from the screen and, putting his glasses down on the desk, he frowned. ‘What are you talking about?’
‘I have a week’s holiday from work and I’m planning to use it to go to Norfolk.’
She could see he was slightly torn now because he wasn’t usually interested in what she did when she wasn’t with him, even if he sometimes trotted out a polite question because he obviously felt it was expected of him. But he was interested now.
‘What are you doing in Norfolk?’
She shrugged her bare shoulders. ‘Looking for a place to rent. I’m thinking of moving there.’
‘You mean you’re leaving London?’
‘You sound surprised, Renzo. People leave London all the time.’
‘I know. But it’s...’ He frowned, as if such an option was outside his realm of understanding. ‘What’s in Norfolk?’
She’d been prepared to let him think that she just wanted a change—which was true—and to leave her real reasons unspoken. But his complete lack of comprehension angered her and when she spoke her voice was low and trembling with an anger which was directed as much at herself as at him.
‘Because there I’ve got the chance of renting somewhere that might have a view of something which isn’t a brick wall. As well as a job that doesn’t just feature commuters who are so rushed they can barely give me the time of day, let alone a please or a thank you. The chance of fresh air and a lower cost of living, plus a pace of life which doesn’t wear me out just thinking about it.’
He frowned. ‘You mean you don’t like where you’re living?’
‘It’s perfectly adequate for my needs,’ she said carefully. ‘Or at least, it has been until now.’
‘That’s a pretty lukewarm endorsement.’ He paused and his frown deepened. ‘Is that why you’ve never invited me round?’
‘I guess.’ She’d actually done it to save his embarrassment—and possibly hers. She’d tried to imagine him in her humble bedsit eating his dinner off a tray or having to squeeze his towering frame into her tiny bathroom or—even worse—lying on her narrow single bed. It was a laughable concept which would have made them both feel awkward and would have emphasised the vast social gulf between them even more. And that was why she never had. ‘Would you really have wanted me to?’
Renzo considered her question. Of course he wouldn’t, but he was surprised not to have got an invite. You wouldn’t need to be a genius to work out that her life was very different from his and perhaps if he’d been confronted by it then his conscience would have forced him to write a cheque, and this time be more forceful in getting her to accept it. He might have told her to buy some new cushions, or a rug or even a new kitchen, if that was what she wanted. That was how these things usually worked. But Darcy was the proudest woman he’d ever encountered and, apart from the sexy lingerie he’d insisted she wear, had stubbornly refused all his offers of gifts. Why, even his heiress lovers hadn’t been averse to accepting diamond necklaces or bracelets or those shoes with the bright red soles. He liked buying women expensive presents—it made him feel he wasn’t in any way beholden to them. It reduced relationships down to what they really were...transactions. And yet his hard-up little waitress hadn’t wanted to know.
‘No, I wasn’t holding out for an invite,’ he said slowly. ‘But I thought you might have discussed your holiday plans with me before you went ahead and booked them.’
‘But you never discuss your plans with me, Renzo. You just do as you please.’
‘You’re saying you want me to run my schedule past you first?’ he questioned incredulously.
‘Of course I don’t. You’ve made it clear that’s not the way you operate and I’ve always accepted that. So you can hardly object if I do the same.’
But she was missing the point and Renzo suspected she knew it. He was the one who called the shots because that was also how these things worked. He was the powerbroker in this affair and she was smart enough to realise that. Yet he could see something implacable in her green gaze, some new sense of determination which had settled over her, and something else occurred to him. ‘You might stay on in Norfolk,’ he said slowly.
‘I might.’
‘In which case, this could be the last time we see one another.’
She shrugged. ‘I guess it could.’
‘Just like that?’
‘What were you expecting? It had to end sometime.’
Renzo’s eyes narrowed thoughtfully. Up until a couple of hours ago it wouldn’t really have bothered him if he’d been told he would never see her again. Oh, he might have experienced a faint pang of regret and he certainly would have missed her in a physical sense, because he found her enthusiastic lovemaking irresistible. In fact, he would go so far as to say that she was the best lover he’d ever had, probably because he had taught her to be perfectly attuned to the needs of his body. But nothing was for ever. He knew that. In a month—maybe less—he would have replaced her with someone else. Someone cool and presentable, who would blend more easily into his life than Darcy Denton had ever done.
But she was the one who was doing the withdrawing and Renzo didn’t like that. He was a natural predator—proud and fiercely competitive. Perhaps even prouder than Darcy. Women didn’t leave him... He was the one who did the walking away—and at a time of his choosing. And he still wanted her. He had not yet reached the crucial boredom state which