He glanced at her hand.
Feeling more than a little embarrassed at touching him and offering him comfort, she withdrew and clasped her fingers together in her lap.
He pulled in a long breath, as if he hadn’t filled his lungs during the entire telling of his story. “I learned a valuable lesson. Don’t trust a woman just because she smiles sweetly at you and speaks the right words.” His jaw muscles bunched. “Without truth and trust in a relationship, a person has nothing.” He stared past her. “Nothing but lies, trickery and deceit. I’ll never trust a woman again.”
His words accused her. She had not been entirely truthful with him. Not that he had any right to expect she should be. They were but fellow travelers in search of her sisters.
“At twenty you’re a little young to be making such broad statements,” she told him. “Besides, didn’t you just say to me that, in time, grief loses its grip and it becomes possible to live again? To laugh? To plan? Even to marry again? Or in your case, to love again?”
The words echoed through her. If only time would change things.
But time could not undo the past.
Johnny kept his attention on the road ahead. What had come over him to tell Willow his tale of woe? Maybe listening to her say she’d never marry again had brought his experience with Trudy back into sharp focus. He would not trust easily again, never sure he was getting the whole truth from any woman. “Time might heal things, but some lessons can’t be unlearned,” he told her. “Nor should they be.”
“I quite agree. Seems we both have reasons to choose to never marry.”
He could think of nothing more to add to the discussion, and silence settled between them. Slowly he brought his thoughts back to more pleasant topics than his past. He glanced down at Adam, asleep on his tummy, his knees bent so his little bottom stuck into the air. How could he sleep like that? It made Johnny’s back hurt just imagining it.
He shifted, resting against the back of the bench, and perched one foot on the front of the wagon, getting comfortable for the long ride.
Willow’s head bumped into his arm.
He looked at her and found that she’d fallen asleep against his shoulder. He eased his body around slightly so she rested more comfortably and, smiling to himself, he put his attention back on the road ahead.
Poor girl had a lot of bad stuff in her past. All those deaths had left her afraid to remarry, no doubt fearing she might again lose the love of her life. The least he could do was see she found her sisters and got settled in their newly rented house. Perhaps he’d go to town occasionally to check on her after that.
She wasn’t a lot different than Thad, and he was beginning to get over his grief. Willow would, too. If Johnny could do anything to help that process, well, he didn’t mind, so long as it didn’t interfere with helping Thad, and didn’t require anything more of him than an occasional visit. That should be safe enough.
They hit a bump and Willow jerked away. She wiped her mouth and scrubbed at her eyes. “I fell asleep.”
“Seems so.”
She looked at his arm. “How long have I been leaning against you?”
“Can’t rightly say. Didn’t mind.”
“There’s a wet spot on your sleeve where I drooled.” She rubbed at it, pink staining her cheeks. “My apologies. You should have wakened me.”
“Nothing wrong with sleeping. I know you didn’t get a lot last night what with little Adam fussing.”
They both looked at the baby. He snuffled and rolled to his side.
Willow brushed her hair back with her hands. “Travel is hard on him. It disrupts his routine. He likes to move about more than he can in the little space he has in the wagon. I feel bad that I have to make him endure this.”
Johnny tried to think what to say to ease her concern about the baby. Before he could find any suitable words, he noticed a tipped wagon by the side of the road ahead. Goods lay scattered about and several people hustled around the outfit. “Someone’s having trouble up there.”
She jolted upright and reached for her valise.
He’d left his rifle on Gray’s saddle and pulled the wagon to a halt to go back and retrieve it. All of which wakened young Adam, who whimpered. Willow scooped him into her lap and soothed him.
When Johnny returned to the bench, Adam reached for him. “Man,” he crowed and gurgled a chuckle.
It pleased Johnny to be greeted so cheerfully, but he’d have preferred to have the baby stay asleep, out of sight and out of harm’s way until he could be certain the group ahead didn’t pose a threat.
Willow must have shared the same thought. “He won’t be happy back in the wagon.”
They didn’t move as Johnny considered what might lie down the road. “It looks like a man and a woman and two children. We’ll see if they need help, but we’ll be cautious.”
“You don’t have to tell me.” The way she clutched the valise said she was ready for anything. She parked Adam on the bench between them and they simultaneously edged closer, crooking their elbows in front of the boy to keep him safely confined.
Adam patted both their arms and grinned at them. “Mama. Man.”
Johnny’s heart swelled inside his chest. This little guy had given him so many enjoyable moments. Just as quickly, his heart shriveled. He’d never have a son of his own, thanks to Trudy’s deceit. Unless he was willing to forget the past. His jaw clenched.
He urged the horse forward at a measured pace, which allowed him lots of time to evaluate the scene, as it did those ahead of them on the road. It might be to the advantage of both, since surprises generally weren’t advisable.
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