Millie had her own rocking chair in her own room.
When she’d commented on how beautiful it was, Adam had blushed. The man’s cheeks actually turned pink. He’d said that Edith was responsible, that it was all her doing. But, when Millie thanked Edith the next time she came out to visit, Edith had said it was all Adam’s doing. That he had requested a room for Millie that was both feminine and comforting.
Regardless of who did it, Millie loved her room.
She also loved this house. And these children. Really, it would be hard not to love Catherine and Eugene after spending more than five minutes with them.
Yes, things were going well. By anyone’s standards—with the exception of her failure to follow through on her carefully wrought plans for each day. Somehow, she could never seem to catch up...or escape the feeling of being on the edge of some sort of precipice.
Part of the problem was Millie’s sense of unfamiliarity with what was outside her front door. Inside the house, life was not too different from life in Saint Louis. Once she figured out where to find water, wood and food that was. But, outside was very different from anything Millie had ever encountered. And it intimidated her beyond belief.
Adam had tried to teach her what she needed to know. But he was busy every day. Between the fields from the farm aspect of the land and the livestock from the ranch aspect, he worked fifteen hours each day, coming home only for supper and an hour with the kids before bedtime. Edith said that was normal for this time of year. That things would slow down in late fall and winter and then they would have plenty of time together.
Millie didn’t know how she felt about that.
But, that was a worry for another day.
Despite his busy schedule, Adam had made sure Millie was comfortable gathering eggs and milking the cow. So far, those bare necessities and laundry had been the only reasons Millie had left the house. Until today.
Feeling like she had things inside the house under her control, today’s plan had included tackling the vegetable garden out back. It was in deplorable shape, largely due to inattention. Now that she was here, though, she wanted to get it back to its full glory. It wasn’t just aesthetic—they needed that garden for food.
Millie had some experience with small gardens, but had never tended anything as large as the monster out back. Of course, gardens in the city were meant to supplement food purchased from merchants. Here, though, the garden was supposed to be one of their primary sources of food. That made it a priority.
Millie glared at her notebook again. The one with the plan for her to work peacefully in that wreck of a garden while the children were napping. Too late for that now.
Well, it seemed that Millie was going to learn how to tend a garden and keep an eye on two small children at the same time. There was simply no other choice. Besides, the fresh air would probably do the children some good.
Two hours later, Millie found herself on her knees in the dirt. The plants here were definitely struggling, but they were not dead. Adam’s attempts at keeping the garden going around all his other duties had been enough to sustain life. Millie felt certain—okay, she really, really hoped—that the plants would flourish now that she was here to tend them regularly.
Oddly, the prospect excited her. Much like her room, this was a piece of earth that Adam had said was all hers. And, she wanted to do something with it. Make these dying plants and dark earth turn into a bounty of food that could feed them all year long.
“Am I doing it right, Millie?”
Caty and Gene had not hesitated to get down in the dirt with her. Genie’s chubby little fists were almost a blur in the beginning as he had just started pulling anything growing and tossing it in a pile. Vegetable or weed, if it was in his path it was yanked and thrown, all with an accompanying grin and nonstop chatter.
But, he was where Millie could see him, and was trying. Good enough. Besides, it took less than five minutes for Genie to decide playing in the dirt was more fun than dealing with pesky plants anyway.
Unlike her brother, Caty was taking her job very seriously. She spent long minutes considering the plants in front of her, fingering the leaves with solemn eyes and an intensity that almost made Millie sad. The girl looked so terribly fearful of getting anything wrong.
“You’re doing a great job, Caty. In fact, I’m watching what you do to make sure I get it right.”
Caty didn’t smile. “Really? I don’t think I am doing it the way I’m supposed to.”
Oh, Millie wanted to gather this child in her arms and just create a space where all Caty felt was love and acceptance. She didn’t. Instead she sat back and brushed the dirt off her hands. “I know what you mean.”
Caty looked at her. “You do?”
Millie nodded and smiled, heart still feeling almost too tender. “I’ve never had a large farm garden before, Caty. And certainly not a garden with weeds as big as the plants, all of them looking a little worse for wear. I am kind of guessing what to do here.”
Caty twisted her fingers in her lap. “Daddy tried to make a good garden. He tried really hard.”
There was no stopping Millie’s hand from reaching out and brushing down Caty’s hair. Then stroking her fingers over the child’s cheek. Millie’s muscles twitched with the urge to pull the child onto her lap, but she held back. She’d resolved to wait until Caty was ready to come to her, not wanting to push the girl. “I know he did, honey. And you know what? He did a good job.”
Caty’s eyes were still far too serious. Doubting.
“He did. I mean, look at all the vegetables that are growing here. I can’t wait to see what else comes up.”
Caty looked at the garden and nodded.
“And now all we have to do is clean it up a little. Then, we’ll have the best garden I’ve ever seen in my whole entire life.”
“Really? I mean, Daddy tried. But, it’s—” Caty was clearly trying to balance honesty and her loyalty to her father.
“A mess. Yep. But, it’s our mess, Caty-girl. And it will be our wonderful garden when we’re done.” This was the first time Millie had used Adam’s nickname for Caty. She watched, trying to decide if it made the girl uncomfortable. Really hoping it didn’t.
Caty went back to leaning over the area of garden where they were working, this time pulling a weed quickly and surely. “Yeah. It’s our mess.”
Millie smiled and took up a similar position. They were going to weed their garden in the sunshine. Life was good.
Millie’s enthusiasm had dampened somewhat an hour later. She was hot and sticky and absolutely filthy. She and Caty had also only made progress in about one fourth of the garden. Growing vegetables was harder than it looked. But, Millie pictured the end result and pulled at the next weed she saw.
She stopped when she heard a horse ride into the yard. The children ran to greet Adam as he dismounted. He gave them hugs and set them back down, telling them to go play as though nothing was amiss.
But something must be. Why else would Adam be home at this hour?
“Good afternoon, Millie. I see you’ve decided to deal with the disaster I made of the vegetable garden.”
His voice was courteous, as always. Adam’s treatment of her had not wavered since the first day. He was kind. Gentle. And distant. In other words, he was everything he had promised Millie he would be. And that was another thing that unsettled her to no end.
“I’m trying. I’ve never had a garden this big before, so I’m not sure I’m doing it right. Caty has been a huge help.”
Adam walked over and looked at her work. “You’re doing a