The door opened, tobacco and wool and engine oil. She sprang. A gun went off. Her teeth met in flesh. Blood spilled into her mouth. She thrashed. The gun went off again, spitting bits of concrete over them. He was down! She released her bite and breathed in his face. He stared back, trapped, eyes wide, lost in terror. Good. Let him see what it was like.
She trotted out of the room, following his distinctive scent through twisting corridors. The fool had left open a door leading to the surface. She ran.
Chapter Four
THE MOTOR RUMBLED IN THE SILENCE OF A RURAL night. Lucilla wished she’d saved some of the coffee from earlier. To her relief, Pascal eventually asked, “Do you know your primes?”
“Choose something more difficult,” she said. “That won’t keep me awake, it’s only recitation.”
He thought for a moment. “What is the pattern? Eighteen, fifty, one hundred fourteen, two hundred forty-two.”
Lucilla pondered as she drove. Working backward, she arrived at the solution. “N plus seven multiplied by two. Another.”
“Create one for me,” Pascal said. They passed an hour in this fashion, their patterns growing quickly more complex as they tried to outdo each other, laughing and cursing when they failed. After an hour, they switched to word games, which became games of association and thus reminiscences.
“We lived on the outskirts of London, so we could play outside. When I was small, I liked playing with boys more than with girls. Dolls bored me, unless I could send them flying from trees or floating downstream on a raft. I played with Anthony, who lived in the house next door. My brother, Crispin, was too small, really, but he followed Tony everywhere, and me, as well, and I liked having a follower. He was the sweetest little boy.”
“I didn’t like other children,” Pascal said. “They never wanted to speak of interesting things, only run about like a pack of rabid, howling animals.”
“I doubt they appreciated being called rabid,” Lucilla noted with some humor. “I assume you did not restrain yourself?”
“No, I did not,” he said. “Tact is foreign to me. It’s a waste of time. We have so little on this earth.”
“So how did you amuse yourself?”
“My grand-oncle Erard, the one who took me to the Antipodes, taught me accounting, and navigation, and a number of card games. He was a most satisfactory companion,” Pascal said, and when she glanced at him, he was looking at her. “It’s always pleasant to meet someone agreeable.”
Lucilla refrained from pointing out that if he made himself agreeable to more people, this might happen more often. She was beginning to understand his priorities, and to wish she could share his indifference to societal rules of politeness. A woman didn’t have as much freedom in these matters as a man, but she could think of some cases in which she might have been better off to say what she thought. In the future, she decided, she would do better. She said, “When Anthony grew up, he married our neighbor, Lizzy.”
“Should I be sorry that he married her and not you? You would not be here if he had. Or would he have allowed his wife to travel abroad to study derivatives of phenacetin? If not for those things, I might still be negotiating for a way home to France, instead of motoring along with a woman of considerable intellectual attainments.”
Intellectual attainments, and willing to have sex with him, as well, Lucilla thought, amused. “You can be insufferably smug when you’re right,” she said. “My life would have been very different had I married Tony. He and I grew apart when he became interested in girls, as I apparently was not one.” She could not imagine ever allowing Tony to kiss her as intimately as Pascal had done. Perhaps unfamiliarity had some advantages. One did not know what to expect, so one was more open to new things.
Pascal said, “I scorned girls long past the point of most boys.”
“You must have had a change of heart at some point.”
“I will tell you, if you wish to hear.”
In the easy intimacy of the long dark ride, it was easy to say “I do want to know.” She paused. “I’d rather not speak of my broken engagement, if that’s all right with you.”
A brief pause. “My curiosity was so obvious?”
Lucilla admitted, “I don’t want to spoil this by thinking of him. In fact, I don’t think I shall think of him ever again.”
“Will you think of me, instead?”
“I will,” she said. Pascal would be difficult to forget. “Now, tell me of your amorous adventures.”
He hesitated. “I have never spoken of this to anyone else. You understand?”
“Yes,” she said.
“Very well. My father worked at shipbuilding, and my grandfather, as well. We lived near the docks. I saw prostitutes ply their trade, and at home we children slept in an open loft above my parents’ bed, where we could hear what went on. I saw no mystery in sexual congress.”
For all his English education, he’d grown up among the working class. Lucilla found it didn’t matter to her. “My upbringing was very different,” Lucilla said, though it was obvious he did not need her to tell him this. It was the best she could say to acknowledge their differences. “My mother would have summoned up the wherewithal to give me the basics if I’d gone through with my marriage, I suppose, but I had to go to all sorts of lengths to find out what I wanted to know.” She paused as an idea slid into place in her mind, like a puzzle piece. “Women are easier to control if they are not allowed to know their own desires.” After pondering this for a moment, she asked, “Did you know your desires?”
“I felt desire, but it caused me to be angry with myself. I had thought I was different from other males,” Pascal said ruefully. “It was a sad day for me when I found myself loitering for a glimpse of women’s ankles. I was not prepossessing. I was healthy enough, but very small until I reached my seventeenth year. Like a plucked chicken.” Lucilla laughed at this image. He would not yet have grown into his nose. He continued, “I had no idea how I should speak to women, or how to entice them into an alliance.”
“Surely you’d seen others courting.” In her world, once one reached a certain age, courting had taken up ninety percent of everyone’s energy.
“Their conversations had no point, and even seemed duplicitous at times, as surely no one could truly believe all the things men said to women, and vice versa. I watched, and eventually deciphered the language of their bodies, which was often quite different from their spoken language. Communication on both levels was required. Mastering both was the solution. I then experimented.”
“With some success?”
“None at all.”
Lucilla laughed. “I was expecting the triumph of the scientific method.”
“I continued to have faith in it for some time, though my academic studies took more and more of my time once I began to prepare for university and work toward various scholarships,” he admitted. “I had given up when a woman chose to seduce me, just before I left for Cambridge.”
He fell silent for a moment, drinking from his bottle of lemonade.
Lucilla said, “Will you tell me what it was like?”
“How would you like me to tell you?” He spoke quietly, barely loud enough to be heard over the rumble of the engine.
Lucilla swallowed. She kept her eyes on the packed dirt of the road, winding away before the motor’s lamps. “Tell me as if we were lying together. After.” She pictured it in her mind, their bodies close and warm, the sound of their breathing, the scent of their effort lying