As they rode up to the first floor she tried to think of something she could do or say that would let her off the hook for tonight at least. She wasn’t ready, she thought desperately, for such a drastic change in her circumstances. She stole a look at her husband, but his dark face was expressionless.
The bridal suite consisted of a small, nondescript sitting room, with a writing desk and a television set, and a much larger bedroom containing a king-size bed with a white quilted satin coverlet sporting an enormous pink heart in its centre.
In spite of the nightmare scenario ahead of her, Cally knew an almost overwhelming desire to shriek with laughter. At the same time she found herself thinking that it was a far cry from the Virgin Islands, where their original honeymoon had been due to be spent. She tensed inwardly. She couldn’t let herself think like that. Allow herself to remember a time when she’d been a naïve girl, wrapped up in her own fledgling dreams and hopes. Oblivious to the harsh truths of the world around her—even her small part of it…
‘Your overnight case is there.’ Nick’s voice shocked her back to the present, and its realities, as he nodded towards the luggage stand. ‘And the bathroom’s through that door. I’ll be in the sitting room, having a nightcap and dealing with my messages. It should take about twenty minutes.’ He gave her a brief, formal smile. ‘Can I get you anything?’
‘No.’ Her mouth was dry. Twenty minutes. ‘Thank you.’
The door closed behind him, and Cally was alone. Temporarily at least.
She walked over to the bed and sank down on to the appalling cover, looking around her.
A resourceful person, she thought, should be able to escape from this situation—maybe by knotting sheets together and climbing out of a window. Except that a loud humming noise and frequent arctic blasts suggested that air-conditioning was in use and that the windows were hermetically sealed.
So it seemed she was committed beyond recall to this madness.
Her heart was fluttering against her ribs like a wounded bird, and her legs were shaking, but there was no point in staying where she was, with the minutes passing.
And there seemed little chance that Nick would agree to spend the night on the sofa in the sitting room, or allow her to do so. No matter how reluctant she might be, she would have to share this bed with him.
As for the future—her mind cringed away from its contemplation.
At least she knew now, with total certainty, why he’d asked her to marry him in the first place. Not because he’d ever wanted her in any real way, but because she was young, and probably fertile, and he needed her to give him a child. Something the woman he really loved could not provide, she thought, wincing as all the old pain and anger slashed at her again.
A year ago she’d been a naïve, trusting fool, but she would not fall into the same trap again. She’d accepted his terms now and she would adhere to them. There would be no more nonsense about imagining herself in love, or using Nick Tempest as the focus for her pathetic romantic fantasies. He was a businessman and he was offering her a business deal. Nothing more, nothing less.
She owed him, and he expected to be repaid. It was as simple as that.
And while she was with him she would learn to turn a blind eye to his extra-marital indiscretions. Steel herself never to ask where he was going, or where he had been. And, above all, never—ever—again follow him anywhere…
Those were matters of priority, and certainly she would be under no ludicrous illusions about love, marriage and ‘happy ever after’ this time around.
She got up and went across to the luggage stand, unzipping the overnight bag. The exquisite nightgown she’d bought with such shy hopes a year ago and never worn lay neatly folded on top of the other contents. She picked it up and shook it out, feeling the soft folds of white chiffon and lace drifting through her trembling fingers.
Everything in the case was new, in honour of her brand-new future, including the quilted apricot bag for toiletries with its pretty beaded embroidery. She took it, with the nightdress, into the bathroom.
The fittings were old-fashioned, and the shower was a trickle rather than a torrent, but she managed somehow, patting herself dry with one of the meagre towels. Then she slid the nightdress slowly over her head.
A year ago the chiffon would have enhanced slender, blossoming curves and made them seductive. Now it hung from her, she thought, giving herself a last disparaging glance in the mirror before turning away. Her shoulders and arms were thin, and her collarbones like pits. Her breasts were those of a child again.
But why should she repine? After all, the last thing in the world she wanted was for Nick to find her attractive. He liked beautiful women—he’d never made a secret of it. And for a while there, as she’d bloomed under his careful tutelage, she’d been—almost lovely.
But that girl no longer existed, and what was he left with instead? A rag, a bone, and a hank of hair. That was all.
And maybe the connoisseur in him, the sensualist, would not find that enough.
She trailed back into the other room, took clothes for the next day from the case—fresh underwear and a mid-calf dress in primrose linen, square-necked and cap-sleeved, which she hung up in one of the fitted wardrobes. After all, she’d bought it purposely to wear on the first day of the rest of her life, so it seemed an appropriate choice for tomorrow, if slightly sick.
And it was barely creased, indicating that her bag had not simply been left unopened and untouched over the past twelve months, as she’d thought likely.
Either that or she’d expected the entire contents of her luggage to have been removed to the nearest charity shop, erasing all physical reminders of her from his life. And yet it was all still there, wrapped in tissue and waiting for her.
He really had intended that she should go back to him, she thought shivering.
Her time was nearly up, so, with another apprehensive glance towards the sitting room, she reluctantly climbed into the wide bed, hugging its extreme edge as she reached up and turned off the pink-shaded befrilled lamp. Lying rigidly on her side, she closed her eyes tightly and kept them closed, trying to breathe deeply and evenly as if she was asleep.
It seemed an eternity before the door between them opened quietly and she knew she was no longer alone. She was aware of Nick moving about softly, then the click of the bathroom door, and beyond it the noise from the shower.
Cally tried to relax—to sink down into the mattress—giving the impression that she was dead to the world. But it wasn’t easy—not with tension building inside her all the while.
For the first time in her life she was about to spend a night in bed with a man, and in spite of his assurances she was petrified.
Eventually she heard him come back into the room and walk quietly across to the bed. There was a soft rustle like silk, as if he was removing a dressing gown, then she felt the mattress dip slightly as he joined her. The other equally awful pink lamp was extinguished, and the room was dark.
He was nowhere near Cally, maintaining his distance as promised, but she was intensely conscious of his presence just the same. His skin smelt cool and fresh with the fragrance of soap, and some unguessed-at female instinct told her, without a shadow of a doubt, that he was naked.
She froze. Her heart was thudding like a trapped animal beating against the bars of its cage as she waited tensely.
‘For God’s sake, relax.’ His voice in the heavy darkness was weary with exasperation. ‘I don’t go in for force.’
At least not tonight, Cally thought, but did not dare say it.
‘Can’t you understand how difficult this is for me?’ she demanded tautly.
‘I don’t find the situation easy either,’