Sleepover Girls Go Snowboarding. Sue Mongredien

a champion chip-eater. Even better, Emma (oldest sister – OK but a bit bossy) is going through this teenage “Don’t want to get fat, don’t want to get spots” phase at the moment so she isn’t touching anything remotely greasy. You know what that means, don’t you? All the more for ME! I’ve got her so sussed that if she even looks at a chip, all I have to do is say, “Terrible for your skin, Em,” and she’ll back away as if it’s going to infect her with the plague, just by sitting there on a plate. Fantastic!

      Of course, Molly (other sister – and horrible pig I have to share a bedroom with) still shovels them down her neck like the Cuddington Potato Famine has broken out, worse luck. And she wonders why I call her Molly the Monster… Plus, she’s skinny as anything and hasn’t got a spot near her, so I can’t use my Emma tactics on her. YET!

      Anyway, I decided I might as well start on the Kenny-Goes-Snowboarding campaign straight away.

      “Mum, you know for Christmas this year…” I started saying through a mouthful of sausage and tomato ketchup.

      Mum raised her eyebrows. “Yes…” she said.

      “I sense our daughter is about to put in a request for something,” Dad said, clapping a hand to his forehead. “I just get that feeling…”

      I ignored him. “Well, you know we always go to Grandma’s, or Granny Mack’s for Christmas?”

      “Yes…” Mum said in a suspicious what-does-Kenny-want-this-time? kind of voice.

      “Spit it out, love,” Dad said.

      “Well, what do you think about going abroad this year? Going on holiday? Maybe somewhere snowy,” I said, crossing my fingers under the table so tightly I nearly cut my blood supply off.

      “Laura, what are you getting at?” Mum said. “What’s all this about?”

      “I just thought it would be nice to do something different,” I said casually, shrugging as if I hadn’t really thought about it. (Yeah, right!)

      “She wants to go snowboarding, Mum,” Molly the Monster said smugly. “I heard her talking to Frankie about it on the phone.”

      “Shut up!” I said crossly, kicking her. “Mind your own business!”