Josh goes to a school that is way posher than mine, but somehow much more normal. It’s a boys’ school but they let girls in for sixth form – and imagine how lucky those girls are. It’s in the countryside, only about an hour away, but Josh boards during the week because he actually likes it.
Despite this, he somehow manages to know absolutely everyone our age in this town, and is kind of universally beloved. When they’re not hanging out at The Crown – where Josh sometimes goes on a Friday night, too – Amie Bellairs and co sometimes deign to go to house parties held by boys from Josh’s school. Somehow he manages to be the guy who all the parents love, while always having a stash of weed on him and being the drunkest at parties.
‘I swear, this boy’ll be the death of me,’ faux-laments Greg, ruffling Josh’s hair affectionately and handing him a beer.
‘Come on! Sit down, let’s eat!’
The cries begin reverberating around the house as the younger kids thunder down the stairs, more drinks are poured and we all pile in around the kitchen table – kitchen rather than dining room because it’s just the Greens and we’ve been having these kind of chaotic, casual family dinners since the days when Josh and I used to smear food on our faces and then get thrown in the bath together. OK, great – that’s just put a weird picture in my mind that I can’t get rid of as I slide into my seat…
‘So, Sorana,’ Tina asks, as soon as we’ve all got loaded plates of lasagne in front of us, and the salad bowl and garlic bread are doing the rounds, ‘it’s your birthday coming up soon, isn’t it? The big one-seven. What are you up to? Are you going to be out partying?’
‘Um, Trouble Every Day are playing at the Arts Centre. I’m going with my friend Shimmi.’
An all-ages local gig at the Arts Centre may not sound like the most amazing thing to be doing to celebrate my seventeenth birthday – but it’s my favourite band of all time, playing a small venue about ten minutes’ walk from my house and, even though it’s still a few weeks away, I could not be more excited.
‘Oh, that chubby girl Shimmi Miah?’ Josh says through a mouthful of food. ‘The one whose parents own the curry house? Sam O’Shaughnessy told me that she… Actually, never mind – I’ll tell you later.’
That’s another funny thing about Josh – he’s kind of a gossip. I know he probably won’t tell me later; because it gets him in his parents’ good books, he always makes out that we’re much closer than we really are.
‘Much too salacious for us elderly folk.’ Pete grins. ‘So, what’s this party you’re running off to tonight, Josh?’
‘Just this girl Alice Pincott, who’s going out with my mate Dan.’ Josh shrugs. ‘Her parents are away and she’s having this big house party. She’s got a pool; it should be quite good.’
‘Alice Pincott,’ my mum echoes. ‘Isn’t she in your class at school, Sorana?’
‘Yeah.’
‘Well, are you going?’
‘No.’
‘Why don’t you go along with Josh?’ Tina suggests. ‘It sounds like you’ll probably know some of the girls there.’
‘Um, I’m not sure…’
‘Sorana’s way too cool for my rugby mates and their dollybird girlfriends – aren’t you, Sorana?’ Josh cuts in, giving me a nudge and a grin. ‘There’s no way she’d want to go. She’ll be too busy reading Sylvia Plaque or something.’
‘Sylvia Plath,’ I correct half-heartedly.
‘Yeah, whatever. Actually, on that note,’ Josh goes on, wolfing his lasagne in record time, ‘I’d better go. It’s nearly nine, and I said I’d give Sam and Gilly a lift. Thanks for the food, Lucy and Pete. See you, Sorana. Mum and Dad – don’t wait up. Be good, kids.’
It’s only after the door has slammed behind him and I’ve heard Josh’s car pull away that it occurs to me. I thought he was being so nice by saving me back there and not making me look like a total reject. But, actually, it would have been nice if he’d asked me if I wanted to go with him. I’d have said no but, just for once, I’d really like to be asked.
Chapter Four
I swear it’s nothing to do with Josh’s all-too-fleeting appearance and swift exit, but I feel out of sorts for the rest of the weekend. Although the rest of the evening was fine, I felt a bit deflated from the second he left. Sunday’s always a nice, chilled-out ‘family day’ in my house, but there’s something about Sunday nights that makes me want to kill myself. That’s not just me, is it – everyone gets that?
So, when Monday morning rolls around, of course I’m tired and grumpy as usual from having stayed up as late as humanly possible in order to prolong the weekend, reading Daisy’s Heat magazine while listening to Trouble Every Day on my headphones.
Which means that the morning is a blur until I find myself plonked down at my desk with a copy of On The Road hiding my face. I’d actually forgotten that anything might be different today. No sooner has Amie arrived, checked her pink BlackBerry — spoiled, much? — and flipped open the ubiquitous fashion mag, than the common room door swings open again and the twins walk in like they have been here forever, already more comfortable than I am after all this time. They somehow manage to look just as cool in their school uniforms as they did in their own clothes – seriously, how is that even possible?
As soon as Amie sees Elyse walk in, the ice is instantly broken. Melanie is not far behind, looking nonchalant despite the fact that she’s clearly not as confident as her sister. Their coats and bags are thrown onto the nearest desk, room is made on the sofa, and the conversation is immediately intense. Though, breaking the unwritten rules, when they pass my desk, both of the glamorous new girls smile and say ‘hi’ to me.
Even though I look as though I’m engrossed in my Kerouac, I am ear-wigging furiously and spend the next ten minutes reading the same sentence repeatedly. It’s Elyse and Amie doing pretty much all the talking, while Melanie is largely silent. Abruptly, Melanie looks up and catches me staring; rather than looking startled, as I might have expected, she gives me a friendly smile. I smile back but am so embarrassed that I quickly look away.
‘Obviously you’ll want to come to The Crown with me and the rest of the girls on Friday night – it’s where all the cool people go…’
As she says this, Amie shoots a targeted, bitchy look in my direction, just to make sure that Elyse and Melanie are clear on exactly who is and isn’t included in this invitation. Simply going out on a Friday night isn’t nearly as much fun for these girls as feeling superior to the rest of the population is. I comfort myself with the knowledge that, to Amie, ‘cool’ seems to mean wearing a minuscule outfit and getting groped while puking up WKD in the street.
‘…and this Wednesday night we’re staying over at my house – my parents are away for the week, so it’s just me and my older brother. They go away a lot, so it’s become kind of a tradition – break up the week and have a bit of a party. You two’ll come, right? You can stay over at mine.’
‘Yeah, OK. Cool.’
I suppose I should resign myself to the fact that The Amazing Twins and I are never going to be friends. As the room starts to fill up, their words start to be drowned out, made less distinct with every girl that comes into the room and starts faffing and chatting. Nathalie spills into the room complaining about being behind in Sociology, closely followed by Shimmi and her incessant crowing about some allegedly gorgeous boy who did not stop staring at her all evening when she was waitressing at her dad’s restaurant on Saturday night.
‘Hey,