“Well, he came through it,” Neil immediately assured us as he pulled off his surgical cap and rubbed his face with both hands. “But, he’s got a long way to go,” he quickly added, tempering our exclamations of joy and relief.
“Unfortunately, the left side of his head took the brunt of the impact and his left ear was completely sheared off.” A gasp erupted from both Maven and Francine. Jim took his wife’s hand and Olivia took Francine’s as Neil continued. “Honestly, folks, that’s the least of his problems. His brain is bleeding, and there’s a lot of swelling, so we performed a trepanation. We drilled a small hole in his skull to reduce some of the pressure,” he explained in layman’s terms. “Right now, Rusty is in a coma, but we’re hopeful that once some of the swelling goes down, he’ll come out of it. The bottom line is, only time will tell. I wish I could be more positive for you, but it’s just touch ’n go at this point. Maven, Jim, if y’all want to stay here, I’ll see about having some cots brought up for you.”
He stood up, placed his hands in the small of his back and did a small backbend. “It’s gonna be a long night, folks. Everyone try to get some rest. I’m staying here for a while. If there’s any change, I’ll let you know.” Everyone uttered words of thanks as he left the room.
“I’ll be right back,” I whispered to Mama, who was sitting next to me, and then I hurried out to the hallway.
“Dr. Aldrich. Neil!” I softly called, stopping him. From the way his shoulders drooped, it was obvious that he was exhausted.
I hurried up to him. “Is there anything else you can tell me that you didn’t say back there?”
“Come in here with me while I get some coffee,” he said, ushering me into a small doctors’ lounge.
“Here, let me,” I said, knowing how Neil took his coffee. I’d done it enough. I walked over to a tray of white mugs sitting by a coffee pot and pastries on a long table that was set up in front of a bank of windows at the back of the room. After stirring one small teaspoon of sugar into the otherwise black coffee, I handed it to Neil. Rather than moving to one of the chairs, he simply leaned up against the refreshment table and ran his hands through his thick auburn hair.
“God, I’m tired,” he admitted before taking a sip. Then, “He’s bad off, Lily. I wish our neurosurgeon, Robert Simon, was on staff right now but he’s gone to New Zealand for the holidays. He has a daughter there. We did what we could though, and, honestly, I’m not so sure there’s much else Rob could have done. The brain’s a complex organ—a miraculous one, but a complex one. Like I told Rusty’s family; all we can do is wait and see.”
“What are his odds?” I softly asked.
“He’s the darkest horse in the race. Only the most foolish would put any money on him,” he frankly replied.
Placing my hands on my hips, I looked down at the tops of my red t-strap pumps and took several deep breaths to keep from crying. It did no one any good to see me breakdown. I needed to hold it together for the Hollisters, for my family, and even for Neil. The last thing he needed was to have to console some weeping female. Suddenly, he lifted my chin with his thumb and forefinger so that he could look me in the eye.
“You don’t always have to be so strong, Lily,” he said, with a small smile. He’d worked around me enough to know that I hated showing any signs of weakness. His compassion and understanding started to widen the small fracture in my composure and my eyes welled up. “We’re doing everything we can,” he reassured me in a whisper.
“I know you are,” I replied, my voice thick with emotion.
Neil studied my face, then tucked the long side of my bob behind my right ear. “I’ve missed you, you know.” I could hear the emotion in his voice.
“I know,” I whispered. “But, Laura’s a good—”
“I know,” he repeated, cutting me off.
Then, before either of us could remind ourselves of the fact that our actions would hurt other people terribly, Neil leaned in and gently kissed me. I responded with all of the longing that had been building up in me over the months, turning our gentle kiss into one of heated intensity.
Finally, some semblance of common sense broke through to my emotionally overloaded mind and I pulled away from him. Wide-eyed, I covered my mouth with the back of my right hand and shook my head at him. “We can’t do this. We can’t,” I whispered thickly as I started to back toward the door.
“Lily, I…” Neil let his words trail off and watched me for a moment before turning to face the window. He ran his hand through his hair again, but this time it seemed like a response to frustration rather than exhaustion.
“I’ve got to get back…I need to see…” I let my sentence fall away as I hurried out of the lounge and ducked into the ladies’ room right next door. Fortunately, there was no one in there. Locking myself in one of the three stalls, I closed the lid on the toilet seat, sat down, and cried out all of the sadness that weighed down my heart. As the tears flowed freely, I wondered if all of the pain and unfairness that life seemed to dole out would cause my heart to close itself off, making it as hard as concrete.
Chapter 7
Looking from the Outside In
I returned to the waiting room and found that more people had arrived to keep vigil. Janice Reynolds, Buff’s wife, was among the new arrivals. I learned that Buff suffered nothing more than a broken leg from the impact of the collision, and had just gone up for surgery. Marv Tollison, and his wife, Gloria, and Scott Monroe were there as well. Scott, as it turned out was Buff’s first cousin. Laura Aldrich was another addition to the group. When I walked into the room and saw her, I felt the blood drain from my face. Although I said hello to her, my eyes couldn’t quite meet hers. I hoped she wouldn’t notice it. If she did, I prayed she would assume that it was nothing more than everyone feeling at a loss for words. Olivia scooted over on the couch and I sat down by her.
“You’ve been crying,” she whispered, looking stricken. “What did Dr. Aldrich say?” She clearly assumed I’d been driven to tears by what he privately told me about Rusty’s condition. To a certain degree, she was correct.
“He said he’s bad off, Olivia. But we already know that. We’ll just keep praying and, hopefully, his brain will stop bleeding and the swelling will go down. We just have to wait ’n see, though.”
Olivia looked down at her crossed hands on her lap and several tears splattered the tops of them. I put my arm around her shoulders. “He’s in good hands, Sister. They’re doing all they can. Fortunately, Rusty was in good shape, so that helps a lot. If I were a betting woman, I’d put money on him to pull through.” I was lying through my teeth but I hoped Olivia didn’t realize it. “Have y’all had anything to eat?” She just shook her head in response.
I needed some air, and, more than anything, I needed to be away from Laura Aldrich. Standing up, I looked around the room and said, “How about if I get some coffee and sandwiches for everyone? It’s not gonna do Rusty any good—or Buff either—if we don’t keep our strength up.”
“I’ll go with you,” Mama said, standing up.
We went around the room writing down what everyone wanted, and when I asked Scott what he’d like, for some odd reason, I had as much trouble meeting his eyes as I did Laura’s. He told me he was fine at the moment, but thanked me anyway, and then Mama and I left the room.
“Let me run into the ladies’ room,” Mama said. As she did, I waited out in the hallway. Suddenly, I felt exhausted. I leaned back against the wall and closed my eyes but I opened them a moment later at the sound of approaching footsteps. Scott was walking toward me.
“You know if the men’s room is this way?” he asked, jutting his chin in the direction past the ladies’ room. Now that I was standing next to him, I realized he stood about six feet tall. Though he wasn’t extremely tall, he was well built, making him a