Becoming used to such a small area in which to live also proved to be difficult. The entire cottage could fit into his dressing room at Wollstonecraft Hall. Yet he understood he still had an easier time of it than the many families in and around Carrbury.
Never had he been so alone. Damn it all, he was homesick. Preparing lessons for the next day took up most of his evening, but he was used to lively conversations and the presence of his family. Sometimes in this small abode, the silence was deafening. The ticking of the wall clock sounded like pistols firing, and the slightest breeze whistling through the shutters mimicked a banshee wail. All this did lessen in intensity whilst he prepared his lessons.
After unlocking the door, he entered the cottage. The bits of furniture were not in the best condition, obviously donations from various residences in town. There would be a brief break next week on the first of October, in conjunction with the harvest moon, an agreement reached by the farmers and board members to allow children to help with the harvest and prepare for winter. Riordan would head home, borrow a wagon and horse from Garrett, and return with a few choice pieces of furniture, like a more comfortable mattress. He sighed as he lit the oil lamp. He missed a great many things. But even in his maudlin bouts of homesickness he found a sense of accomplishment in the fact that he was earning his keep. When he’d accepted this position, he decided to live within his means for the year. It had been sobering and humbling.
Teaching exceeded all his expectations. Never did he believe he would derive such inner contentment. Turns out he enjoyed the experience, and already it had moved beyond research for his educational reforms. He began to foster plans, like building the progressive school he’d spoken to his grandfather about. Perhaps he would make himself headmaster. Until then, he soldiered on with his work.
He’d instituted Sabrina’s suggestion of a brief cessation of study, and it had been a complete success. The children gobbled down the ginger biscuits, and after their respite appeared brighter and more alert for the remaining day. Riordan made a mental note to bring up the subject at the next board meeting. There was no reason why the children could not break for a short recess and play outside for ten minutes, weather permitting.
Laying his satchel on the table, he exhaled with relief when he spotted meat pie and fresh bread on the counter. Moving efficiently about the small kitchen area, he lit the wood stove and placed the kettle on it, then slid the plate into the oven to warm up the pie. A knock sounded at his door. He’d already removed his frock coat and rolled up his sleeves—should he answer the door in such a casual state? Riordan strode to the front door and opened it.
Sabrina. At least, he guessed—the lady in question wore a wool cloak with a large, fur-trimmed hood that obscured her face. But the enticing scent gave her away. “Do come in, Lady Pepperdon.”
She scurried across the threshold and he closed the door after her.
“May I take your cloak?”
“No. I’m not staying.”
“How did you know where to find me?”
“My maid inquired for me.”
Her words were clipped. She would not meet his gaze, remaining hidden under the hood. Gently, he lowered it, and she gasped. Grasping her chin, he made her look at him. “Why have you come?”
Her lower lip trembled. “Let go of me.”
Sabrina’s harsh tone was covered in frost. This from the woman who’d desperately clung to him a mere couple of days past. Riordan did as she asked. “Answer my question.”
She looked about the small room, and in finding a chair, sat upon it. He could see the distaste in her eyes as she observed his sparse and simply furnished cottage. She was the same as those pretentious young ladies he’d come across at balls. Her haughty tone and look dismissed his earlier sympathetic thoughts toward her. Annoyed, he crossed his arms and waited for her to respond.
Clasping her gloved hands tightly in her lap, Sabrina finally met his gaze. Her harsh expression relaxed, her eyes glistened. “First, allow me to apologize for being forward in asking you to marry me. I haven’t been myself of late. I have nowhere to turn, and the feeling of being lost and desperate makes me cross and annoyed with myself. I do not like being helpless, I abhor it, and yet I have been from the moment I was born.” She laughed cynically. “I have had no say in any aspect of my life. My mother died when I was young. All I have known is cold disregard from my father, even hatred, for I was a daughter, not the son he wanted. The first chance he could be shunt of me, he took it, would not even allow me a season to find a suitable husband near my own age. Instead, I was handed off to an old man—sold to the highest bidder, so to speak.”
Sabrina looked away, her eyelids blinking rapidly. “Forgive me. I’ve been indulging in bouts of self-pity. I suppose I could surrender and allow my father to dictate whom I marry. But I cannot. I must fight in any way I’m able, do you see?” She met his gaze once again, her eyes full of unshed tears. She spoke with such heartrending emotion, his annoyance fled. And to think he thought her chilly and snobbish.
“Yes, I see. As a man, I cannot begin to comprehend how powerless a woman must feel. You’re right; from the moment of birth she is dependent upon men to see to her comforts, her very survival.”
“Precisely. My father threatens to turn me out to find my own way. Where? How? What is a woman to do? I don’t want to be a kept woman, but I’m not trained for any kind of occupation. There is the companion path, but those positions are few and far between. This is the best option I can come up with to work my way toward the independence I crave. I need to formulate my plan without haste.” Sabrina hesitated, and sniffed the air. “Is something burning?”
Damn it. He sprinted to the kitchen and, using a tea towel, reached into the oven for his meat pie. The edges of the crust had started to burn, but the rest was salvageable. Caught up in her narrative, he’d forgotten about his meal. Placing the dish on the counter, he rolled down his sleeves and buttoned the cuffs. He should put on a jacket, but to hell with it.
Riordan returned to the small parlor. “Merely my dinner. I caught it before serious damage was done.”
She stood. “I should leave and allow you to eat….”
“It will keep. Please, sit and continue.” As she did, he clasped the chair from the dining table and set it near her, but not close enough to crowd her.
“I spoke with my father; he will meet with you to discuss a possible marriage. That is, if you have decided to participate in my mad scheme.” She frowned. “You were correct at the first; I’m committing fraud, but I do not care. My father owes me for my miserable childhood and miserable marriage. And if it sounds like a rationalization for the underhanded plan I’m about to embark on, I can live with the consequences. What I cannot live with any longer is not being in control of my life. I am taking the reins.”
Sabrina spoke with courage and determination. On the whole, she was perpetrating a fraudulent plot. But her reasons smacked of truth, with a smattering of revenge. Did he wish to be part of it? “Let us say I meet with the baron. He could still insist that you marry the marquess regardless.”
Her lower lip thrust out. “Yes. He could. My father said, ‘You can march every eligible male before me from a hundred mile radius; the fact remains, I would have to approve of the match and the man would have to meet the terms.’ I have no idea what he means. He would not tell me the amount of the settlement.”
“How much did he pay the earl?” Riordan asked.
“I’m not sure, as Pepperdon would never speak of his negotiations with my father. He did mention a sum of fifteen thousand pounds once, saying I was not worth the amount. It was meant as an insult; he often claimed I was useless and worth nothing.”
He frowned. The earl had been a miserable cur.