“Take a deep breath and please don’t tell me anything you will regret later.”
He was very sensible. Her hands shook and she felt her pulse pounding. A whore. He spent all their money on a whore. She pictured a frowsy blond with too much makeup, wearing a tight teddy and four-inch heels. “I want to meet her.” She didn’t know why, but it was vitally important to see the woman who had been fucking her husband. Fucking. She’d seldom thought in vulgar, four-letter words before.
“I don’t think that’s such a good idea, Pam,” Gary said calmly. “You now know what was going on and you really should let it go. Move on.”
She felt her anger rising. “Let it go? When some prostitute took all Vin’s money?”
“She didn’t take it, he gave it. That’s quite different.”
“You sound as though you condone what she did.”
“I neither condone nor condemn it, and after all, she had no obligation to you. Vin was the one who wandered.”
“Wandered. Interesting way to put it.”
“I’ve learned over my years in this business that there are usually reasons for everything in life and, in this case, sleeping dogs are better left undisturbed.”
“There’s more to this than either of us know, and I want to find out what was really going on. I’m sure the check I gave you will cover a little more of your time. Make it happen.” She felt heat rise in her face and the fury made thinking difficult. “I want to meet his whore.” She didn’t know why she needed this, focused on it so fiercely, but she did.
“Calm down, Pam. You’re reacting without any thought.” His voice had taken on a soothing yet slightly condescending tone. “I’d advise against this. Please let it go. You found out what you wanted to know. What can be gained by meeting the actual woman?”
Her anger flashed so hot she could barely think. “I want to see her, tell her that she ruined my marriage.”
“Did she ruin something good?”
Pam tried to take a breath but her anger had taken over her entire body. She wasn’t exactly sure what had made her so furious so suddenly, but now that she had a focus for it she needed to vent it. Who was she so angry at? she wondered. This prostitute? Vin? Herself for settling for a lousy sex life? Being mad at the other woman was easier than the alternatives. “I want to meet her.”
“If you’re sure that’s what you want…”
“I am.”
“Okay. Let me see what I can arrange, but it won’t be easy. They’re very private at Club Fantasy and very, very careful.”
“Set it up. I don’t care what it costs.”
“If I do this, I have to trust that you’ll keep this between you and the woman. No cops, no scenes. If I can’t believe that you’ll keep it all in proportion, I won’t even try.”
“I’ll be good, I promise.” Would she? Could she? She deliberately relaxed her shoulders and nodded slightly. Her voice lost its sharp edge. “I really do promise. I won’t make a scene. Please, Gary, I don’t know why, but I need this.”
He looked at her for some minutes, then sighed. “I’ll make some inquiries and see what I can do. Please, though, think it over for a few days when you’re calmer and can get everything back into perspective. You husband’s gone, and what went on before his death has no real relevance now.”
“I know, but this is important to me. I promise I won’t change my mind and I won’t violate your trust. Set it up.”
It was almost a week and a half before Gary called. It was a Monday and the weekend had been tough. She’d had little to do so she’d been bored out of her mind. She dusted and ran a vacuum over the carpets in the downstairs. After a quick lunch she put her few dishes in the dishwasher and cleaned the sink. She’d tried to read or watch TV or a DVD but nothing had caught her interest. She’d puttered in the garden but the landscapers had everything under control. What was she going to do with the rest of her life? There had to be something more for her. She thought about going to the country club, but now that Vin’s death had begun to recede in everyone’s mind, a few of the men had begun to act differently with her. Coming on to a possibly sexually frustrated widow had become a new sport, and wives had started to view her as dangerous.
“I was wondering whether you’d been unable to arrange anything,” she said into the phone.
“I was hoping you’d have changed your mind.”
“I haven’t,” she said. “It’s important to me.” She’d thought a lot about why she needed this and was no closer to understanding. All she knew was that the idea banged on her brain and wouldn’t let go.
“Okay. I’ve set up a meeting with one of the women who run the club for tomorrow lunchtime,” he said. “We’re meeting at a little Chinese place called Oriental Wok in the West Sixties at noon.” He gave Pam the address of the restaurant. “Does that work for you?”
“Yes, but what do you mean ‘we’?”
“I’m going to be there to be sure the meeting stays pleasant and nonconfrontational. Any hint of unpleasantness and I’ll drag you out of there, bodily if I have to.”
“What kind of a woman do you think I am?”
“I’m sorry, but I’m not taking any chances,” he said, his voice brooking no protest. “I vouched for you, for your intelligence, your integrity, and your ability to keep this a personal thing, not a public one. I’m going along to be sure nothing gets out of line.”
“Out of line?”
“No violence, no tape recorders, no nothing. My trust in you goes only so far, Pam. I don’t really know you at all except for the fact that you’re furious with the club for supposedly ruining your marriage.”
“What do you mean supposedly? Those people got their hooks into Vin and bled him for every cent he had.”
“Hold on, Pam,” Gary snapped through the phone. “Let’s get one thing straight. He went to them. From what I was able to find out, there’s never been a report of coercion of any sort at the club. They had something he wanted and he visited the place of his own free will.”
“How can you say things like that?” she said, trying not to cry. She thought she’d reasoned it all out, but there was sudden pain. “What could he get there that he couldn’t get at home?”
“You’re the only one who can answer that,” he said patiently. “I don’t want you to tell me anything, but think about this. Was your sex life everything it could have been? Did Vin really get what he wanted from you in the bedroom?” When she took a breath to snap out the obvious answer, he continued, “Don’t answer and try to stop the knee-jerk ‘it was terrific.’ Be honest with yourself for a moment. Unless you’re honest, you won’t be able to understand the reality of what went on.”
She held her tongue, then let out a long, shuddering breath. “Okay, I’ll be good. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
Pam clicked the End button on her cell phone. Tomorrow. She’d find out what she could about this Club Fantasy and then, if there was even a hint of anything illegal—besides the obvious, of course—she’d blow the whistle. There had to be blackmail or something like it involved in Vin’s payments. He couldn’t be visiting a