The WATERCRESS File. Victor J. Banis. Читать онлайн. Newlib. NEWLIB.NET

Автор: Victor J. Banis
Издательство: Ingram
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Жанр произведения: Юмористическая фантастика
Год издания: 0
isbn: 9781434437082
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      Aunt Nasturtia gave a disgruntled snort and hobbled past Mathews and out of the room, fixing a cold stare briefly on the blonde’s head before she disappeared out of sight.

      “I’m Mari,” the blonde informed Craig with a wink of her own. “That’s short for Marigold.”

      Craig frowned thoughtfully, ignoring the blunt hint in her smile—Aunt Nasturtia was not the only nympho in the house, if he was any judge. “Lily, Nasturtia, Marigold—is everybody in the house named like a flower?”

      “Um-hum, ain’t it a gas?” Her smile faded as the strains of “The Minute Waltz” sounded from nearby. For the first few measures, the notes were perfect. The beauty of the music was marred, however, by a clinker of a note. The pianist stopped, and then started over at the beginning. Craig smiled as the same note was again struck wrong, and the music paused once more. This time the pianist began the first movement of the “Moonlight Sonata” instead.

      At that moment, Jackie returned, with yet another elderly figure. This one seemed at least more sane than the other, a tall, willowy creature with quick, intelligent eyes and animated gestures.

      “Mr. Mathews, this is my Aunt Lily,” Jackie said. Mathews took the offered hand, surprised by the hearty squeeze he received.

      “Jackie says I’m to tell you all about our experience,” Aunt Lily said with a nervous smile.

      “I think that might be a good idea,” Mathews agreed. He was beginning to feel that the sooner he got out of this place, the better he would be. They were obviously looney; for all he knew, they might be dangerous. That one old girl had looked positively capable of devouring him—for that matter, Holmes appeared capable of that, in a manner of speaking.

      * * * *

      “Now then,” Craig said when they had seated themselves. “Suppose you explain about Butterfly. As I understand it, you’ve stumbled upon some sort of message, is that right?”

      “Well, I think so,” Aunt Lily agreed. “But it’s in a code apparently, so I don’t really know what kind of message, or if it even is a message. I’d better start at the beginning.”

      Craig nodded his approval.

      “Well,” she began. “It started this morning. You see, we have a poodle—Fritzie. Do you know Jackie’s poodle, Sophie?”

      Mathews had to admit that he had not, ignoring Jackie’s quick smile of amusement. “They’re twins,” Aunt Lily went on. “Except for the sex, of course. But the thing is, they’re both white, and rather spoiled, I’m afraid.”

      Mathews was having a difficult time seeing how all this tied in with Butterfly, nor was he particularly interested in their choice of pets.

      “And it was raining, this morning,” Aunt Lily said emphatically, as though that explained everything, which of course it did not.

      “I see,” Craig said helplessly.

      “Oh, dear, I don’t think I’m explaining this very well,” Aunt Lily said, putting a hand to her face.

      Mathews was about to agree with her, but Jackie spoke before he had the opportunity. “Take your time,” he said, “And don’t worry, Mr. Mathews is very patient.”

      “Of course,” Mathews agreed without enthusiasm.

      “Well, it was the rain. Nasturtia didn’t know it was raining, you see—have you met Nasturtia, Mr. Mathews? I can call her....”

      “I’ve had the pleasure,” Mathews informed her hurriedly. He had no immediate desire to further confuse the conversation by including the other aunt in it.

      “Anyway, it was raining, and Nasturtia didn’t notice, and she let Fritzie out into the yard to play. Well, you can imagine what Fritzie looked like when he came back in, just covered with mud and all. So I told Nasturtia she’d have to take him to the beauty parlor, only our regular shop was booked up, and couldn’t take him, so Nasturtia went to another one just down the street, one we had never been to before.”

      Mathews nodded, although he still was not able to discern the point of the story, and wondered if she might have forgotten why he was here.

      “They did a lovely job on him, I must admit,” Lily went on. “Except that when Nasturtia went back to pick him up, they had put clips on his ears—little sequined butterflies.”

      Mathews attempted to conceal his disappointment—was this all she had been talking about?—a pair of costume pins for a dog?

      Jackie too had a twinge of disappointment, but he knew Aunt Lily well enough to recognize at once that she had more to say. At that moment, however, Nasturtia, who must have been listening in the hall, appeared in the doorway.

      “It isn’t my fault,” she snapped defensively, although she had not in fact been accused of anything. “I told them not to put anything like that on Fritz—he’s a boy, after all.”

      “But they did put the pins on, and you didn’t even notice,” Aunt Lily said in a tone that indicated this subject had already been discussed at length between the two of them.

      “Well, I had things on my mind,” Nasturtia grumbled in a weaker voice.

      Mari, who had been quiet up to this point, snorted disdainfully. “You may as well admit it,” she said. To Aunt Lily, she explained, “She told me that the clipper there was a doll, and she was all excited over him. That’s why she couldn’t think of anything else.”

      “Mari,” Aunt Lily said reproachfully.

      “Well you needn’t sound so smug,” Aunt Nasturtia said petulantly to Mari. “Just suppose you tell how you went to the store with five dollars in your purse, bought all those things for Lily, and came back with five.”

      Aunt Lily raised one eyebrow quizzically and turned to Mari, silently indicating she would like an explanation.

      Mari glowered at Nasturtia for a moment before dropping her eyes to the floor. “Well,” she mumbled. “I met this sailor on the bus....”

      “On the bus!” Lily was shocked.

      “It was practically empty,” Mari said quickly, with a brief smile. “And we were all the way in the back. Anyway, he put his jacket over us, so nobody could see anything if they looked.”

      Nasturtia giggled triumphantly, and Lily only frowned her disapproval silently. Jackie coughed to hide his amusement, which was heightened by the crimson blush that flashed over Mathews face. The agent was finding the family a little hard to believe.

      “I think you’d better go on and finish your story,” Jackie said, heading off any possible quarrel. He was eager to hear the further details anyway.

      “Of course,” Lily agreed, giving both the other two ladies withering glances before she smiled in Mr. Mathews direction. “When Nasturtia brought Fritz in, with those awful little pins on his ears, I’m afraid I was a little perturbed. I scolded her, and then I took the pins off, but I was annoyed and I wasn’t too careful. One of them broke, and to my surprise, there was this note hidden inside it.”

      “I wouldn’t have read it,” Nasturtia said cheerfully, “But I thought it was a love note from the clipper.”

      Lily glowered coldly at her again, before producing a crumpled scrap of paper from her pocket. “To tell the truth, I wasn’t immediately suspicious,” she explained. “But then I saw it was in a code of some sort. That, and the fact that it was hidden, made me wonder. And then, there was the fact that it was a mistake—I mean, our getting the note.”

      “A mistake?” Mathews asked. He was watching the note eagerly, plainly impatient to see it. Aunt Lily, however, was intent on finishing her explanation before she handed over the note.

      “Well, it seems there was another woman there when Nasturtia went to pick up Fritz. And she was picking