Grandmother loved to play bingo and would visit her own siblings in Northeast Philly.
She was tough on the kids- but she gave them what they needed by being a stay at home mom.
Though my mom had a lot on her plate, she didn’t give into the agony and kept her head held high as the family didn’t believe they’d have to undergo the loss of their mother.
They’d have to find their way through life without her.
At the time, my mother was nineteen years old and was carrying twins out of wed-lock, something I wouldn’t comprehend until years later.
I would never meet my father. She said that he denied that we were his, he would never give her a dime and support his children.
To this day I call him my sperm donor. He disappeared after hearing about our anticipated arrival.
During her relationship with him, she had no idea of how dishonest he really was.
My mother found when she was pregnant with us that our biological father had another family. Before she was to go away with him for a so-called romantic weekend, a friend called to give her the news. She explained to my mother to not go with him, or to believe anything he said, for he was a complete liar.
She never imagine him lying to her. But the truth was for real. He was married with two kids. He never confessed and he told her she was insane.
My mom had no other choice but to believe the truth. She in time saw that real liar he was.
She realized she was going to be a single parent, as she would not be getting his support financially or emotionally.
My mother’s reaction was to not torture herself over this and move on.
We were due in September 1979, but my mom was hospitalized in early July from having some complications, that resulted in a early sudden birth.
Her father came to visit that day, not thrilled with the idea of her having a baby out of wedlock and had no idea until his arrival that he had twin granddaughters.
My mother’s remembrance was that she never imagined seeing her father cry- as he later told my mother that he would make his home our home too and help raise us due to the absence of our father. He also wished to name one of us after a dear family member.
In this new stage of his daughters life, Pop’s said that we were the most beautiful babies he ever saw and was astounded that we were his twin granddaughters.
I believe my mother held a unique relationship with her father, she recalls him being a tough one to deal with, but strong at heart.
Family meant to him that no one was left behind and he wasn’t going to leave his oldest daughter out of the house; he would continue to support her emotionally. He felt strongly that we needed a home, not a foster home, or an adoption agency.
Pop-Pop started to hold a beautiful, unconditional, loving bond with his granddaughters that would expand throughout the years to come.
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However, after our arrival the house was definitely full of chaos, as Grandmother was not doing well with the cancer. She became weak and tired which took her away from her daily affairs.
I’ve heard stories about how in December 1979, she was constantly complaining about how bad her head hurt from the treatments from the hospital. She was apparently suffering extremely from this devastating cancer, but as my mother shares her stories, she says that while at home Grandmother loved to put our socks on our feet and mix and match them.
Grandmother shared some quiet times with us as best as she could.
Today, I feel sad not remembering my Grandmother physically, but I know that she loved us deep inside her heart and we will meet her one day soon- in the heavens above. My mother says that she was happy she had identical grand-daugther’s- as she loved to spend some quality time with us as newborns.
Grandmother would pass away when we were only six months old and I know my family suffered a severe loss. My mom mentioned that they had a beautiful and memorable last Christmas together with Grandmother.
I formed my own projection of that last Christmas, as if they all sang songs on the piano while they laughed, like the good old times. I sometimes get a glimpse of that day, seeing my Grandmother smile with the ones she so dearly loved. I can only imagine how the departure of Grandmother caused a hunger in her own children and families’ hearts.
Grandmother passed away on January 17th, 1980…
Leaving her husband, their five children and four grandchildren at the time. I know this was a very mournful year for the family. My mother was only twenty years old and my youngest Aunt barely a teenager. My Uncles were young and anticipating other children and awaiting milestones.
Still the family lost this beautiful, witty, hardworking, loving woman at such a young age.
Never, would I give up longing to meet my Grandmother Rosemary and have her wrap her arms around me with her love.
Grandmother Rosemary
Rosemary
While gathering some stories together, I asked one of my family members some questions of my Grandmother Rosemary. I was honored to hear how much she impacted lives.
Rosemary, or as Pop’s called her, Ace. Was a good lady, raised 5 kids, and dealt with their everyday issues- 24 hours, 7 days a week, 365 days a year… with little help.
She loved Coca Cola, Charlie Chips, and Bingo. Of course her Salem cigarettes that probably killed her, but that is what she liked.
She somehow managed to give her children what they wanted and needed, on that $20 that Whiskey John gave her every week.
How did she do it?
She was also a caring person, who would always be willing to help out people on the block. If someone was sick, or died, she would make a cake, or a dish and bring it to them.
She didn’t work until all her kids were in school, then she worked as a janitor and cleaned house for a lady named Mrs. Crowell.
She was a pretty lady, and in her younger days, her and Pop’s wouldn’t go out very often, but when there was a wedding or a holiday party, she would get her hair all done, and get all dolled up.
She would be very attractive, she was funny… zany, kind of like Lucy from the Lucille Ball TV Show.
She could love ya one moment and smack the crap out of you the next!
Her kids use to press her buttons all the time, and they paid for it. She loved to play Bingo, and when she won, she would always bring pizza home