The Iceman. Jeff Edwards

board under the glow of my desk lamp.

      It was hard work for Tom at first. I kept him busy trying to teach him the moves each piece could make while trying to antici-pate what my overall strategy might be. Devising both a defence to that strategy and an attack for his own pieces often drove him to distraction, but I refused to make it easy for him and he gradually showed signs of improvement. I respected him for sticking to the difficult task despite his many setbacks and he slowly developed a chess mentality.

      Finally Jim reached a level of proficiency where I believed that he could be competitive and allowed him to finally take my king.

      I can still see the smile on his face as he announced ‘checkmate’ and I tried hard to adopt a defeated expression. He leaned back in his chair with the look of a man who had just completed the marathon and had triumphed. My heart went out to him and I stood up and made my way around the desk before leaning in close and kissing his surprised lips for the first time. ‘To the winner, the spoils,’ I said softly.

      It was amazing how much his game improved over the ensuing days and I can still see the look of anticipation when victory now appeared to be within his grasp. I continued to win but did allow him an occasional victory, rewarding him each time with kisses that became more and more ardent.

      After one memorable victory our emotions boiled over and we made love for the first time on the office desk with the scattered chess pieces strewn around us and he proposed to me a week later in the afterglow of yet another win.

      It was after making love on our honeymoon and our naked bodies were entwined when Jim had asked me if I had been allowing him to win. I had kissed him lightly on the lips before conceding with a smile that I had. ‘But,’ I added, ‘you have come close on many occasions and we have the rest of our lives for you to learn how to do that. I’m going to make sure you do. Chess is a game that can be learned quickly, but it takes many years to become adept at it. I’ve been playing since I was a very small child. You have a lot of catching up to do.’

      He looked at me with a serious expression. ‘This has all been a game to you, hasn’t it?’

      ‘I wanted you from the first day we met, Jim Sutton, just like you wanted me. I was simply adopting a gambit to make sure that we both achieved our desires.’

      I sighed as I recalled those bittersweet times from my past but acknowledged that in doing so I had also released other, less welcome memories.

      The fog of despair returned and I wondered if I would ever be able to escape the past.

      Perhaps death was the answer after all.

      A nurse came by to take my blood pressure and asked if there was anything I needed.

      I thought for a moment before reaching a decision. ‘I’d like to speak to a minister. Is there one available?’

      ‘I’ll make a call for you.’

      Jim Sutton

      O

      n the way to the hospital I made a quick detour to a shop that one of our clients had told me about some time before. I found what I was looking for and instructed the staff to giftwrap it for me.

      On my arrival at the hospital I had expected to be allowed to go straight into Matty’s room, but a nurse on duty stopped me.

      ‘She’s speaking to a minister and has asked not to be disturbed by anyone.’

      ‘A minister?’

      ‘Yes. She asked for one to call on her earlier today.’

      ‘She’s all right, isn’t she?’

      ‘Your wife is fine at the moment.’

      ‘This isn’t like Matty at all.’

      ‘It happens sometimes to people who are faced with a serious illness,’ replied the nurse reassuringly.

      I impatiently paced the corridor outside her room, anxious to find out what was happening inside.

      The sounds of muted conversation came through the open door and I halted at the doorway, but with the curtains drawn around her bed I couldn’t make out what was being said and I continued my pacing. What could she possibly need to discuss with a minister? Matty and I had spent the greater part of our lives together and I thought I knew her, but this turn of events had taken me by surprise.

      Finally the minister said his goodbyes and I caught up to him as he walked down the hall. I introduced myself and asked, ‘Is Matty all right?’

      ‘Your wife is fine,’ he said reassuringly. ‘She wanted to discuss a problem with me. I think we’ve managed to sort it out and she seems much happier now.’

      Still confused, I thanked him and made my way back to Matty’s room where I found her propped up in bed and writing what appeared to be a letter.

      Seeing me, she quickly flipped the pad over and held out her arms. I hugged and kissed her. ‘The doctor rang me, Matty,’ I said quietly.

      ‘I told him to. I didn’t want you to have to hear it from me.’ She smiled her wonderful smile at me. ‘Don’t worry. I’ll get over this. It’s only a minor setback.’

      I hugged her tighter and prayed that she was right. ‘What did the minister want?’ I asked innocently.

      ‘He was on his rounds. Bringing a little peace into our drab lives,’ she replied brightly.

      That was not what I had been told by the nurse and it hurt me deeply that she was hiding something. I knew that there was little I could do and that now was not the time to press the point. Instead I handed her the brightly papered present that I had brought with me.

      ‘Christmas already?’ she asked cheekily as she tore at the wrapper. Her laughter was a sliver of sunshine on a cloudy day as she revealed the ornate chess set that lay inside. ‘Thank you, darling. This will certainly help to make the time waiting for my leg to heal to pass more quickly.’

      I suddenly realised that was what I did not want to happen. There might not be much time left and it would be a crime for what little time we had to go any faster.