After listening to Allan, I knew that everything would change.
What to write about? It took some time and some false starts but I worked it out three years later. The most obvious and significant things in life often sit in front of your nose.
What you write a book about is the topic that you live, breathe and think about every day. It usually is something you are learning about in your own life. “You teach best what you need to learn yourself” is a favourite thought of mine. So eventually my first book consisted of the inspirational messages that sit in my mind and on my refrigerator and which guide my life. They centre on self-esteem and confidence as well as daring to be different.
What will potential speakers choose as their topic of expertise? It is only when we’re prepared to share the lessons tossed up to us that we really have something worthwhile saying and sharing.
Find your own path as a specialist on life. You certainly don’t have to be a professional speaker to do that. Search out your truths. Tell others what you have learnt along the way. And never stop learning.
In February 1993, at a dinner meeting in Sydney I gave a speech to the Australian Executive Women’s Network as the winner of their Award. The title of my presentation was The Keys to Business Success and this was an opportunity to analyse just what had worked for me, and why, since deciding to put aside my husband’s well-meaning advice.
In thinking about success in business and relationships, I realised I use the experiences of my life, positively, to understand others. I can see myself in everyone I meet: their fears, their ambitions, their disappointments and their searchings. I have probably experienced most of them myself or will in the future. I can appreciate what is going on in their lives without living it. Emotions and desires are remarkably similar in every culture and in every age. The experiences of my life make me a more rounded and sympathetic onlooker and someone who can recognise integrity very quickly.
To be successful in business, especially in your own business, you must be practical. This was my second point. When I began my career in colour and image, I thought that the world was my oyster and that everyone would need my services. Well that’s true, they probably do, however they don’t realise it yet or more to the point, are not ready for it. So the masses of humanity did NOT come knocking on my door. I quickly worked out how much money I needed each week to live on, not to flourish on, just to exist on, and worked out a plan of action to achieve that amount. Don’t be airy-fairy about this, be very practical and if you have to take another job to bring in the rent, do it.
I set goals to work towards, dreams to believe in for my career and the kind of life I saw myself living. I thought about where I wanted to be in the short term, 12 to 18 months, and where I saw myself in 5 to 10 years-time. I worked towards those goals.
On reflection, I’ve achieved all those dreams and more. The most significant factor, however is that some of them didn’t come when I thought that they should: they came in the Universe’s time. I realise these days a very important lesson: my time is not Universal time. So now I say to my higher self, “this or something better, at the right and appropriate time.” And it never fails.
Another key to success in business is realising what being professional MEANS. To me, if you are not totally 100% professional all the time, you’re an amateur playing at professionalism. Some of the actions that to me are very basic to being a professional in business are:
•I walk my talk and do what I say I will do. Always.
•I answer my telephone cheerfully and with a smile and return all phone messages on the day or within 24 hours.
•I’m dependable. I turn up for appointments when I say I will; I have the submission on the desk of the person who requested it, on the day we decided on or earlier.
•I ask customers and other staff, “how can help YOU?” I know that I’m always part of their team too.
•I make others look good. We all bask in the radiated glory.
•I’m creative and different in many of the things I do. Although I’d never thought of myself as being particularly creative in the past, it’s amazing what happens to your inspirational faculties when you have creative friends and then decide to solve problems by using lateral thinking yourself.
•Last year, for instance, I wanted to send Christmas cards that weren’t like everyone else’s. I also didn’t want to pay a lot since I had more than 130 to send. I came up with the idea of using some of the publicity emanating from my Award, having it photocopied than made into a card y the local instant printer and including a message thanking that person for being part of my success. I love it. As it’s easy and so different, I intend creating a card each year that tells my clients something about my company and myself.
•I’m aware of some aspects of the private lives of my clients. How? I ask.
•I’m not nosey but when someone mentions that, for example, she played tennis at the weekend or was on holidays in Queensland we discuss that a little and I store that information away in my mind. I often make short notes about those leisure activities or business occasions in my diary or on their card. Social interaction is the name of the game. It gets business working smoother and faster and I have a reference point to start conversations next time.
•In terms of making phone calls and difficult decisions I follow this advice: “Walk up to the lion and it disappears: run away and it runs after you”. I know that we’re all inclined to put off the tasks we see as being difficult. The longer I find excuses, the worse the situation becomes. When I decide to be fearless and walk up to the lion the power that I’ve given it seems to melt away and the lion becomes a pussy cat. Without fail, I wonder why I’d built up the situation into a major event. So it is in all aspects of business. Sometimes we turn from professional to amateur because we’re frightened to speak out.
•In a world that sometimes loses track of basic values in business and personal relationships, I keep ordinary in an extraordinary world. By ordinary I mean, being honest, trustworthy, reliable, persistent, caring, compassionate and pleasant.
You can no doubt think of many other actions which professional have that others don’t.
In my speech I then went on to discuss some of the other keys to success that open doors for me. One of them is saying “yes” when I’m asked to help others or take on a difficult job. I say “yes, of course” and later work out how on earth I’ll do it. There is always a way. I find that if I’m open to new things, new opportunities occur.
A quote I came across several years ago expresses one of the most challenging and most rewarding aspects of my life, both in a business and personal sense: “dare to love all you meet”. This is the key to understanding yourself and your path in life. The people I find the most annoying, unprofessional, careless, and uncaring are exactly the people who present my biggest lessons. I know there’s much truth in the belief that what you don’t like in others is what you don’t like in yourself. So how do you dare to love all you meet?
Each time I deal with someone who annoys me, on the phone or in person, I remember that I don’t know the circumstances behind their behaviour. As I haven’t had their life’s experiences, how can I judge what causes them to behave the way they do? After all, everyone is doing the best they can. How can I criticise someone for their best?
When I dare to love all I meet, I’m a kinder, more loving person who is coming to terms with herself.
It isn’t always easy. I’m working on it constantly and still I find myself judging from time to time. At least I’m now aware of it happening. When it does work, everything in my life falls into place and small miracles happen.
I was advised when I started out in business to get to know well, and be on very friendly terms with