And so the rollercoaster starts – motivated by fear, you spring into action. Fear goes away, you lose motivation. Fear comes back, and you’re back in action, etc., etc.
Fear may motivate but it’s not the best way to create success in your life.
Myth 4: I am not motivated
Not true! (Unless you are severely clinically depressed.) Everyone is motivated about something – even if it’s to lie in bed on a Sunday morning. Ever “desperately” wanted that glass of wine at the end of the day? That’s motivation. You believe you aren’t motivated when you don’t want to do the things that you feel you SHOULD be doing. When you feel like doing something that you believe you SHOULD be doing then you say you’re motivated.
Motivation is merely a strong desire to do something (whether you feel you should or shouldn’t). You ARE experiencing that feeling on a regular basis.
Myth 5: Motivation is only for work tasks
Not true! People are motivated to do all sorts of different things: play sport, build strong relationships, to be more spiritual, to sleep on the couch on a Sunday afternoon, to climb mountains and swim in freezing rivers….. The list is endless.
Motivation is merely a strong desire to do something.
Myth 6: Giving rewards motivates people
Not entirely true! Like fear, it can result in getting people to do things that they may not really want to do. This way of motivating is called extrinsic motivation.
The problem with this method of motivating people is that they’ll focus on getting the task done as quickly and effortlessly as possible because their eye is on the reward and not on the task. They’re motivated to get the reward. They’re not motivated to do the task well – simply to get it finished.
For example, when I’m filing papers (which is something I hate doing), I set a timer for half an hour. I file furiously and when the half hour is done, I sit down with a nice cup of tea and do something that I enjoy (like writing this book). The problem is that sometimes I file documents in the wrong place because all I want is to get it over with and have my tea. I don’t intend changing my way of getting the filing done because most of the time this method works for me. However, this may not be a useful method to motivate myself when I am coaching someone. “Let’s get this done as quickly as possible so that I can go shopping” would not add that much value to my coaching practice!
Think about the way you run your life. Write down all your extrinsic motivators – as many as you can. What motivates you to keep healthy? What motivates you to see your family and friends? What motivates you to go to work? What motivates you to watch TV for hours? Be HONEST! For example:
♦When I avoid conflict it’s because I fear losing my job.
♦When I avoid doing a report I don’t understand it’s because I don’t want my boss to know that I can’t do it.
♦When I reach for that glass of whiskey I tell myself it’s because I had a long week and deserve it. What I really want is to forget all my troubles.
♦You’re quite capable of doing a task even if you don’t feel like it.
♦You’re responsible for your own motivation levels.
♦Motivation is not only about doing what you “should”. Very often you’re motivated to do things you “shouldn’t”. Either way, you are motivated. Let go of the thought that you are unmotivated.
♦You’ll only do something because you find personal value in doing it.
♦Motivation covers all aspects of your life.
♦Extrinsic motivation (rewards or fear) can motivate – but there are better ways to get you motivated.
Motivation truths
Truth 1: Motivation is a luxury – you don’t have to have it!
So true! A luxury is desirable but not essential – and, it’s often something that’s hard to get. So too with motivation! If you have a job to do and you’re highly motivated – that’s wonderful – enjoy it. However, we are all completely capable of doing something we don’t feel like doing. We’re capable of working even when we’re unmotivated and most people have experienced that feeling. If you’re not feeling motivated, acknowledge your feeling AND do it anyway.
Truth 2: Motivation is catchy
So true! Think back to a time when you were extremely motivated to do something. How high were your enthusiasm levels? Probably quite high... Motivation and enthusiasm seem to go hand in hand. In fact, one of the definitions in the Encarta Dictionary for motivation is enthusiasm. And, enthusiasm is highly contagious. Therefore, we can also deduce that motivation is catchy.
If you’re working on a project with someone who is highly motivated and enthusiastic, there’s a strong possibility that you’ll begin feeling the same way. So if you’re concerned that you’re unmotivated about a task, start faking the enthusiasm until it becomes real – and the motivation will follow. I’ve been doing this with gym lately. I wake up at 4h45 on gym mornings. In winter, when it’s cold, I despair when the alarm goes off. I shout out (in my head), “I really, really don’t feel like this!” Once I realised that a pattern was developing, I gave myself a strict talking to – after all the outcome of gym does have positive consequences. When the alarm goes off, I now say, “Yay, gym! It’ll be good to work out so that my body grows fit and healthy.” It definitely helps to get me out of bed.
Truth 3: You’re motivated by the consequences of your work
So true! I do quite a lot of pro-bono work with prisoners. The reason I choose to do this is not because I love criminals and certainly not because I love going into prison with doors locking behind me. I choose to do this work because these prisoners are unlikely to recommit crimes once they’ve been through the programme. Rehabilitation is the consequence of the work that I do in the prison and that makes the hours worthwhile, giving me a reason to go back. It’s the consequences of the work that motivates me.
If you are feeling unmotivated about a task, think about the outcomes of it. If the outcome inspires you in some way (hopefully it does, otherwise why are you doing it?), then visualise that outcome using all your senses. Run this movie through your head often to help with your motivation levels.
Truth 4: Start the work, motivation will follow
So true! I experienced this over and over again while writing this book. Often I didn’t feel like sitting down and writing. So I’d say to myself, “I don’t feel like this, and I’ll write anyway.” If I felt really bad, I’d promise myself that if, after 20 minutes, I still didn’t feel like it, I could stop. That never happened. Once I got going, my motivation levels rose, and then I didn’t want to stop. So get going, even if you don’t feel like it – motivation will sneak in while you’re working.
Truth 5: Motivation is a habit
So true! Humans often develop habitual ways of being in the world. If you’ve developed an attitude where you see hard work as negative and unpleasant, you’ll mostly feel unmotivated. If you focus on the hard work instead of the outcome of the hard work, you’ll