Everything we do, in every personal relationship, business relationship, transaction or deal we make, there must be a mutual benefit for all. This is not a principle that most people live by in today’s society! Having a sense of honor in what we do, and how we treat people, is needed now more than ever. Developing the ability to understand other people’s motivations by observing their actions is an extremely important skill. Someone whose motivation was not that obvious has fooled us all. We end up disappointed, hurt emotionally and sometimes financially. Considering one’s motivation before taking action can sometimes save us from this disappointment.
Honor
Do you have a code of honor?
Do you have a sense of what is right and wrong?
Do you have the courage to stand up for what you believe is right, even when it is unpopular?
I believe true Budo teaches this. Sometimes we need to be a voice for what is right, even though it may jeopardize our position or others’ view of us. This can be a tough situation to be in, but if we have a code of honor, and conviction for the betterment of something, we must take a stand.
Taking this position can be scary and unpopular. But usually, if our intentions are pure, good will come of it. Sometimes, taking an unpopular stand is much better than living with the regret of doing nothing.
When we speak of honor, we have to think in terms of right and wrong.
Where’s the line?
How far can you go before you cross that line?
Does a line even exist?
Realize that sometimes in life, environmental influences exist that compels us to make compromises that we would not normally make. Compromise is important, but not at the expense of our honor. Remember that once you step over the line of right and wrong too many times, that line begins to disappear. We must do our best to keep our honor and ourselves in check.
The Constant of Change
Do you recognize the fragility of life?
Do you know what tomorrow holds?
Do you recognize that in a blink of an eye many of the things that we are blessed with can be taken away?
If you were to find out that you had only six months left on this earth, what would you do differently?
Would you be a better husband, father, teacher, or person in general?
Would you treat people in a kinder, more compassionate manner?
Would you really listen to the people who are close to you, and try to better understand what is important to them?
Would you learn or attempt something you’ve always wanted to do, but were afraid to?
Would you contribute something that would make a profound difference in the lives of other people, therefore leaving a piece of yourself behind...your legacy perhaps?
What will your legacy be?
What will people say when you’re gone?
Will it be positive?
Will people remember sacrifices and contributions you’ve made, whether they were contributions of time, money, or just of yourself?
Oh! That’s right, you will probably be here in six months. But with this philosophy and discipline, we can change our future actions and our appreciation of things in our life. Living with the philosophy of Budo in our lives gives us an appreciation for these blessings and allows us to see that nothing is permanent and things will always continue to change.
Respect
Do you understand the concept of respect, and that we must strive to respect others even if we don’t understand them? The martial way is all about respect! We must learn to respect our elders for the work they have done and the dues they have paid. Their experience in life can give us much insight and if we’re lucky enough, maybe they’ll share some of their knowledge and insights to make our journey a little smoother.
Conflict
So, if we are looking for an avenue of self-improvement, why train in the martial arts? What does martial arts training give us that is difficult to find elsewhere? Martial arts training teaches us about conflict and how to find better ways to deal with it. In it’s most basic interpretation, training in the martial arts teaches an individual how to deal with the conflict of an aggressive, attacking individual. The goal is to first build physical skills and abilities to neutralize the threat of physical violence. Building the qualities of speed, power, balance and stability, along with eye training in the context of the art’s basic fundamentals is essential in this stage.
In the more advanced aspects of this stage, students learn how to be more subtle and refined with their techniques and strategies. They will learn how to properly use angles to evade their attacker, enabling them to use their techniques more efficiently, as well as taking advantage of using the attacker’s force against them. At this stage, students should also learn strategies to enable them to manipulate the structure and balance of an attacker. Someone who cannot find balance cannot follow through with a powerful, effective attack.
As students progress through this first stage and learn how to deal with the physical conflict of an attacker, they should start to see the connection between dealing with the physical attack of an opponent and the non-physical arena of conflict in everyday life. This realization seldom occurs without a teacher who can expose students to the proper philosophies of the martial arts, and can point out the similarities of these conflicts. It is said that a good teacher can take you places that you’ve never been, while a great teacher can dramatically change the place you’re in. So, it is extremely important to have a teacher who can point out the necessary keys to enlighten the student to the fact that these comparisons exist. However, a true student of the arts may turn to many different sources for instruction, including any resource of written or verbal information that enhances the student’s perspective of these comparisons.
When we talk about conflict in a nonphysical sense, we have to think about the conflict that exists in our personal relationships, business/professional relationships, financial situations, and any type of situation in our life where we feel a sense of conflict. Strategies of warfare directly relate to daily life conflict. In warfare it is extremely important to know or understand our enemy.
Is it any less important to understand our spouse, co-workers, or family? In order to avoid or overcome conflict with people with whom we have relationships or dealings, we must not only understand them but also what’s important to them. Seeing their perspective on things goes a long way when it comes to avoiding conflict or overcoming it. That is not to say what we must agree with it, but being able to acknowledge their point of view is critical in resolving conflict. Sometimes, we must agree to disagree on issues!
Ever wonder why groups of people cannot get along with one another, even when they share the same perspectives and beliefs? Why is there always some sort of conflict? A certain amount of conflict will always exist among groups of people simply because every individual has a certain amount of internal conflict. Budo and the martial arts teaches us to recognize these inner conflicts, and gives us the strength to work towards eliminating them.
This is NOT an easy task.
It may certainly take a lifetime! Not only is it beneficial to work at eliminating these conflicts for the purpose of leading a more balanced life, but also it is essential in helping us make good decisions in a world of many choices. Nowadays, life is extremely fast-paced, and we are constantly bombarded with choices. I believe that working towards eliminating or gaining control over these inner conflicts produces a clearer, more receptive mind, and hones our instincts—all of which helps us to make better decisions and choices.
It all comes down to balance —external and internal. Ever notice how internal conflicts come to the surface, when we are feeling pressured by environmental influences?