Collecting Background Information
Preparing for a Mediation
Moving from Positions to Interests
How to Identify Interests
Seating Patterns in Mediation
The Caucus
Prejudice and Bias
Impartial not Neutral
Knowing Ourselves
Power
Power Imbalance
Anger
Managing the Emotional Climate
Co-Mediation
Functions of a Mediator
Hallmarks of an Advanced Practitioner
Temptations for Mediators
Mediator’s Checklist
National and International Organizations
Canadian College and University Programs
Suggested Readings
Glossary of Terms
Memorandum of Understanding
Standards of Practice
Preface
The second edition of this book builds upon the information and skills contained in the first edition. Revisions reflect advances in my own thinking and comments from those who have used this book. Information about the mediation process has been enhanced and includes sample dialogues, as well as additional information on convening a mediation session. The list of national associations has been updated and a list of Canadian higher education training institutions added.
Mediating Interpersonal and Small Group Conflict explores the theory and practice of the first mediation. The book is organized into two distinct sections: the first dedicated to the major theoretical tenets of mediation, the second to the practice, skills, and strategies used by mediators.
Chapter one discusses the nature of conflict, various conflict styles, the continuum of conflict resolution, as well as the growth and critique of alternative dispute resolution. Chapter two is an overview of mediation theory. It examines the rise of the mediation movement, various ideologies and approaches to mediation, the process of mediation and role of a mediator, along with some of the issues and trends currently facing the mediation community. Chapters three, four, and five highlight the practice elements of mediating interpersonal and small group conflict. Chapter three contains an overview of the key elements of conflict assessment and management. Chapter four describes many of the communication skills used by mediators including reflective listening, effective questioning, reframing, immediacy, bridging, and confronting. In Chapter five, mediation techniques and processes are outlined. Some of these include: conducting an intake, collecting background information, identifying interests, managing the emotional climate, writing agreements, calling a caucus, co-mediation, and hallmarks of an advanced practitioner.
The strategies discussed in this book are based on my learning and personal experience as a mediator over the last twenty-five years. However, the ideas and skills are not mine alone. The study of conflict and mediation is a burgeoning field and many of the topics and suggested practices found in this book are described in other texts. I have included a list of popular Canadian and American books in the back of the book under the heading “Suggested Readings”.
The content of Mediating Interpersonal and Small Group Conflict reflects both my mediation model of choice and personal values which I want to make explicit. I believe that mediation has the potential to empower individuals to achieve greater “insights” into the cares, concerns, interests, and values that are at work in conflict – both their own and those of other parties, as well as insights into the relations that connect them. I believe that individuals have the inner resources to solve their own conflicts and are best placed to do so. I also believe mediation has the power to transform oppressive social institutions. And, I believe in most cases mediation is a better dispute resolution process than litigation or other adversarial processes. I identify myself as a relational mediation practitioner which means that I believe individuals are interconnected and possess the capacity for concern of self and others. My style of mediation is facilitative and largely non-directive, reflecting the principles of self-determination and empowerment. I refer to the model of mediation that I practice and teach as “insight mediation”.
This book has been a long time in the making. That it is being published now is to the credit of a number of individuals. Firstly, recognition must be given to those who have permitted me to mediate and learn from their efforts to reach understanding and empowerment. Secondly, I am indebted to all those who have been my students. Each of you have helped me to become a better teacher and a more reflective practitioner. Thirdly, I have been stimulated to examine the conceptual issues in the field of mediation by many of my colleagues and by my doctoral work. Finally, and most importantly, I want to acknowledge my family without whose support and encouragement I would not have ventured into this wonderfully rich and diverse profession.
1
The Theory
Chapter 1:
Conflict Theory
Conflict is an inevitable, pervasive, and important aspect of social life. It is a relational concept that involves the interaction of people or groups in society. Conflict is generated by differences in ideas, values, and beliefs. Although a familiar part of our existence, conflict has contradictory forms, processes, and outcomes. On the one hand, it can serve to enhance relations, increase productivity, and create new understandings. It helps to clarify and reinforce societal standards and provide an opportunity, for growth and moral development. On the other hand, conflict can create dysfunction and disorder in society, destroy relationships, and cause pain. The central assumption of conflict theory is that it has personal and social value – that it is “functional” for society (Coser, 1956). The study of conflict has been undertaken by a range of disciplines; its resolution has become the fascination of a diverse group of psychologists, sociologists, economists, and game theorists. The result is a field of study and practice that is both rich and stimulating.
The central assumption of conflict theory is that it has personal and social value.
History
Classical thinkers such as Plato and Aristotle viewed conflict as a threat to the success of the state, a view which led to the belief that conflict needed to be kept to a minimum, if not totally eliminated.1 Seventeenth-century philosophers Hobbes and Locke posited the social contract theory that order was essential for a proper society. In opposition to the belief that conflict was undesirable and harmful, contemporary theorists argue that conflict is as essential to the proper functioning of society as are stability and order. For example, Simmel noted that social phenomena appeared in a new light when seen from an angle that included conflict as a positive element; Coser suggested that conflict within a group could help establish or reestablish cohesion; Dahrendorf stated that “not