The way she presented herself became important to Mary when another doll of a person, with one eye closed and the other lazily winked, flashed a signal for her to sit with him. A shot of adrenaline hit her heart. With hesitation she thought am I lovely, is my face smooth, are my cheeks rosy and do I have a nicely contoured shape?
She looked him over and realized in so many ways they were exactly alike----good hair, sparkly eyes, and a hang-loose attitude toward life. It delighted to discover they were different, too. She was wonderfully female; he was wonderfully male.
Mary walked over to his table and stopped, “Excuse me, is this seat taken?”
His smile warmed her, “Not yet. Please, have a seat and join me for some tea.”
She took in his muscles, the clean-shaven square jaw and tuned into his voice. It was as deep as any man. He smiled with ease.
She closed her hand around her cup, feeling warmth.
After sipping tea and chatting with him, she learned his name was Adam, and he worked for the nearby furniture manufacturing company as a traveling salesman. He was in town every two weeks to work in the administrative office before another trip on the road. They exchanged phone numbers. She wondered if he had stuffing and if he did what kind?
They parted with a “call you soon”.
Parting brought thoughts of I want him. Maybe not for keeps, just to play, time will tell.
Mary saw this opportunity as a rope ladder dropped from heaven. She regarded the time ahead as her new dawn, bringing new opportunities, new friends, and new prospects. “It will be as looking through a clean, clear windowpane,” she said out loud for anyone to hear.
None of her past un-pleasantries quashed her zeal or her anticipation of her chance to aim higher, to spend more effort, and to come closer to her ultimate life goals. It was important that she have a fresh attitude in the face of this new beginning. She had stars in her eyes and saw only positive opportunities ahead.
Mary got a part-time job at Sam’s Fabric Shop as a salesclerk. Before work she would stop at the café and sit, sip tea, and daydream of Adam. She was hopelessly, madly, and passionately in love.
So, in the café, among the scents, the noise of people chatters and their occasional glances she gave herself a little of what it craved: the need to bond.
She met people helping each other make their lives and loves better. Mary thought we are born to need social bonds. We are born to need a sense of others, even if we are alone. So, I ponder this chance to rest a moment longer, to drink the aroma of this place.
Mary knew that her upcoming months would bring her new opportunities for growth, exploration, and discovery. Inwardly, she felt she would not be same person she was yesterday. She had awoken to the incredible resources of ideas, energy, and hope that would be at her disposal.
Mary graduated from high school, got a full-time job as a seamstress, moved out of her family home with her grandmother Edie’s sewing machine in tow and rented a furnished two-room apartment near the café and Sam’s Fabric Shop.
Every two weeks she met up with Adam. He was a man of the world; he traveled. He had stories of adventure and Mary was all ears. She had not traveled outside the county. Adventure excited her.
Then, a hilarious thing happened. The stuffing that each brought with them that seemed so appealing at first began to become a little annoying, and then irritating, and then downright infuriating.
Mary discovered that she had a lot of ideas about what a man should be like, which she had taken for granted. To her amazement, Adam did not share all her ideas. In fact, sometimes he thought a man should be the exact opposite of what she expected.
Adam had a lot of “ought” and “should” as part of his stuffing. In his family there was no physical demonstration of affection. So, when Mary teased him for a hug or a kiss, he pushed away. He denied his own longing for intimacy, so that Mary felt rejected and alone.
Mary did not understand she overwhelmed Adam with her demands for love and devotion. Instead of giving him emotional distance and privacy, she increased her efforts to draw him out. When this did not work, she criticized him for not loving her more. After a while, most of their interactions were about Adam’s failings as a romantic partner, rather than about all the great similarities they shared.
Mary connected with one counselor from years past. “Mary, we all bring our individuality and our histories to relationships.”
“You mean everyone is full of fearful stuffing?” Mary inquired.
The counselor reassured, “Everyone has stuff that prevents them from opening up to learn new lessons and from fully exploring the possibilities of growth and rapport with their partner.”
Mary anxiously asked, “What happened to the spark?”
The counselor suggested, 'To rekindle the spark in your relationship, I recommend you create some space in your togetherness so you can each spend time alone, time with friends, work on your job, and develop other interests.
The next time Mary saw Adam she announced, “We should spend some time apart from each other.” She paused, then immediately added, “For just a little while.”
Adam sighed and plopped down on the couch, “Well, I suppose we could both use a break.”
They found it uncomfortable to be without their mate; they felt alone, separate, and lost. Adam called to touch base.
“Adam, I am going to counseling….” Before Mary could finish…
Adam asked, “May I join you?”
Mary and Adam attended counseling sessions to work on their sense of identity. They discovered they could be more sensitive to another’s feelings. They attempted to get rid of the “should” in their relationship and to establish a more accepting, tolerant climate together. No more rejections, they vowed. No more bitterness or demands. Instead, they would try to notice stuffing-related issues as they arose and replace the fears with love and compassion.
Mary and Adam became more familiar with aspects of their inner selves, exercised new heart muscles, and learned to share a deeper form of intimacy with the other.
Several months later Adam, heading for a furniture convention in Las Vegas, asked Mary to join him. Adam and Mary took a road trip to Las Vegas for the convention and time alone.
On the drive Adam wanted Mary to savor the countryside with all her senses, observing and breathing in some of the most spectacular and diverse scenery in the world. Wide-eyed Mary burst with joy, “Adam, it is so beautiful, breathtaking. Thank you for bringing me with you.” He patted her leg and continued the journey.
Driving toward the famous Las Vegas, Mary did not understand, nor could she imagine what their next two-day adventure would be like. As they crossed the dry Nevada desert and topped the last bare hill, Mary exclaimed, “I can’t believe the sight right before me. Everywhere I look I see flashing lights and buildings that seem to touch the sky.”
Heading toward their hotel, they turned onto the Las Vegas Strip, a place of indescribable scale and scope. As they cruised this overly glamorous Strip, there looming was a striking visual, a glass pyramid with its beam of light, its chocolate-and-gold sphinx and rows of shaved palms, the Luxor Resort. “Mary, this is our hotel.” Adam casually mentioned.
“This is amazing. The hotel is in the shape of a huge, black, Egyptian pyramid. I believe my eyes are about to pop out of their sockets.” Adam burst into laughter as Mary continued to stare with unbelief.
Mary’s mind ran wild, “This hotel seems dangerously close to the airport runway's edge. I wonder if the rooms tremble when jets land. Did you notice behind the hotel are mountains kissed by dust, the hue of bone?”
Adam’s