Rosemary was born on the winter solstice, December 21, 1918, just after the close of the First World War to a respectable upper middle class English family. But for her arrival on a propitious date, it would have been hard to predict the arc of a life that would bring her to worldwide fame. It seemed much more likely that she would grow up to live her life as one of countless anonymous conventional country ladies with a nice house and garden, who devoted herself to raising her family and supporting her church. Yet when Rosemary died in 2001, lengthy obituaries paying her tribute appeared in all the major newspapers, including the Times of London and the New York Times, as well as a full page in the less than horticulturally inclined Economist. Some speculated her birth on the winter solstice was prophetic; the stars would align for the rest of her life.
When Rosemary arrived, the war to end all wars had just ended. The English way of life had already begun to change as the gentry learned to make do without the servants lost to the war effort and England began recovering from the devastating loss of a generation of young men. The flu pandemic was also taking its toll on the population, with more than one hundred million deaths around the world. Born into a military family, Rosemary Isabel Baird Sandilands was the youngest of four children of Prescott Sandilands, an officer in the Royal Marines, and Gladys Murton, a former actress nicknamed “Slugs.” The pampered baby of the family, Rosemary joined the company of her older brother, Pat, named for her father, who was seven years older; Francis, who arrived two years after Pat; and her sister Christina, born a year after that. The gap of four years before Rosemary arrived was due, one would guess, to the intervening war years.
Rosemary adored her father and often talked of him later in her life. Prescott Sandilands was handsome and charming, but not very practical. His military salary was barely sufficient to raise and educate his four children in a style deemed appropriate to their social class. Finances were stretched, but Rosemary’s mother, a strong and intelligent woman, somehow managed it all even though the family was always short of money. Her friend and eventual sister-in-law, Gillian Lady Sandilands, observed that she “brought up all those children, found them all places at school. She was marvelous with them and she was very bright. I think that is where Rosemary gets her brains from.”
In many ways, Rosemary took after her actress-mother, inheriting her quick intelligence and her striking ice-blue eyes. Although she rarely talked much about her mother or their relationship, later in her life she did contrast her mother with her father. “My father had impeccable manners, but he wasn’t a great do’er. My mother was a great do’er.… My mother was a great influence on me.”3 Rosemary would certainly prove to be a “do’er.”
More often it was her father she recalled. But then Rosemary would always prefer the company of men. Her father must have cut quite a dashing figure in his officer’s uniform, and Rosemary was clearly proud of him. Military life caused the Sandilands family to move around, so Rosemary spent her early childhood familiar with various Royal Marine barracks. She said, “I have vivid memories of the band practicing on the parade grounds. Every time I hear a military band, I feel they’re playing for me.”4 Something akin to her father’s military discipline would be a fundamental trait of Rosemary’s adult character.
When she was ten, her father retired from the Royal Marines with the rank of Lieutenant-Colonel. He settled the family down in the North of England at Nortoft House, in Guilsborough, Northamptonshire. Life changed dramatically for the young Rosemary, especially when she graduated from her bicycle to her first pony. Horses would become a passion for the rest of her life; she would grow into a skilled and fearless rider and a devoted member of the local hunt.
Shortly after the move to Northamptonshire, Rosemary and her sister were sent away to board at Eversley School in Folkestone, Kent, where they qualified for scholarship aid; it helped that their mother and aunt had gone there in the 1890s. Pat, the eldest son, embarked on a military career like his father and also qualified for financial support for his education at Willington. Francis, the second son, was the beneficiary of the generosity of an aunt who paid for his tuition at Eton as her own son, who had intended to go there, had died tragically young.
Rosemary spent nine years at the Eversley School and admitted that she had almost no interest in gardening. The school was very traditional. All the girls wore uniforms with white crisp collars and striped ties. Visiting ladies came properly attired in hats and gloves. There, she was “trained not to waste good time. There was this amazing feeling of discipline and we didn’t fight it. It was part of life.”5
Rosemary devoted her energies to her schoolwork and athletics. “I loved playing games – tennis, lacrosse, netball, even ping-pong – which I regarded as a due reward after geography and science lessons.”6 Her competitive spirit was already apparent. By twelve, she had won a pony competition, and at sixteen, she won the Kent County Girls Single Championship in tennis. A year later, she lost in the finals due to “too much partying. My family did not allow me to be seriously competitive, but it was fun, and a great honour later to be allowed to play for the county.”
Despite her competitive nature and drive, Rosemary would always remain a product of the conventions and expectations of her generation and class. In her school years, she did not start out following the most predictable path for a young woman. Instead, her “one ambition was to go to college and study mathematics, the subject I most enjoyed,” an area of study by no means an easy or obvious choice for women. At that time, very few women would have even thought of seeking a college degree. But Rosemary was a bright student and her record was sufficiently impressive to cause the headmistress to be “generous” and send her “weekly to a tutor at Southampton University, who taught me enough to get me a place at University College, London.”7
In 1937, Rosemary enrolled at University College and moved in with her parents who had left Northamptonshire to take up residence at Coleherne Court on the Old Brompton Road in London. Instead of math, she found herself more interested in history and switched to economics and social history. Although economics was an unlikely subject for a woman, it is hard to know why she abandoned mathematics, the subject she most enjoyed and would later credit for her interest in garden design patterns. Her tutor was Hugh Gaitskell who was then lecturing there. Gaitskell would go on to lead the Labour Party in England for many years and become a forceful member of Parliament. Although he was highly regarded and was a contender, he never did become Prime Minister. Still, he must have been an exciting mentor and demanding tutor. It was an interesting time to study economics, with the world just beginning to emerge from the Great Depression. Hitler was on the rise and England’s leaders were intent on avoiding another war. In that same year, the King abdicated his throne to become the Duke of Windsor and marry Wallis Simpson; King George VI and his wife Queen Elizabeth were crowned.
Despite the tensions in Europe and the threat of war, life in London for those in the right circles continued predictably, observing longstanding social traditions. During the months of May, June, and July, a period that is still referred to as the “London Season,” the major social events take place since there are better odds that the weather will cooperate, at least some of the time. Ascot, Wimbledon, and the British Open all take place in June. For a girl her age, Rosemary was expected to be presented to society as a debutante and attend the endless rounds of parties and balls.
Thus began Rosemary’s schizophrenic existence; her serious academic studies were “in complete contrast to my debbing season and all the dances I went to in London and the country. It was like living in two quite different worlds.”8 Rosemary’s life as a debutante was almost a full-time job, yet